Evan “Evan Hull” Hull @blakemichigan_
Chicago, IL Joined January 2015-
Tweets3K
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Followers625
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Following672
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Likes38K
I think about killing myself in the same way I think about buying a hot tub where it’s like “man that would be nice but I am just soo not that guy.”
It’s crazy how quickly into robots we got sex robots. Like they made a robot vacuum that worked and then immediately they were like “well I guess it’s about time we start fuckin these things”
This is so god damn funny to watch
This is so god damn funny to watch
“You have to spend money to make money” I say, depositing yet another 100 dollars into my DraftKings account
Winning a parlay is nice but watching that crisp new 100 dollar deposit hit after losing my parlay ooooooh that’s the stuff
Every Uber driver in Chicago drives like they’re on the same type of crank they were feeding German pilots in WWII
Being a 27 year old white guy in Chicago means that rock climbing is ravaging my friend group like pills in a middle class suburb
I used to not get how robots could become sentient but then my roomba tried to throw itself down the stairs and I was like oh wow okay he really is just like me
Every nba team has one of these guys on it
If I made this and it could be proved beyond a reasonable doubt that I was mentally stable it would be justified for one of my friends to beat me to death with a sock full of batteries
If I made this and it could be proved beyond a reasonable doubt that I was mentally stable it would be justified for one of my friends to beat me to death with a sock full of batteries
1994: I couldn’t afford college so I went to technical school and now I’m a mechanic. 2024: I couldn’t afford college so here is day one of me living off my bicycle as I attempt to bike from Alaska to Argentina. Hopefully I will be eaten by a bear.
You always see catholic kids with culturally relevant names like “Peter” “Paul” or “Matthew” but you never see a Jewish kid named “Knee Pain” or “Gerd”
People say suicide is cowardly but I don’t think there’s anything cowardly about looking god in the eyes and saying “I call the shots now motherfucker”
dude has talent…
Savage
My grandfather died at 93. It’s okay, It was his time. Yet still I can’t help but wonder how things would have been if he hadn’t lunged for that cop’s gun.
I used to have it all (hundreds in my draft kings account) then I flew too close to the sun (a bunch of bad 20 dollar parlays)
Walking into the cologne store and saying “I’d like to smell like an Uber that makes you more carsick than you’ve ever been”
https://t.co/V2xUuoWDhW
JOE @LeBron_Eames
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the men in my family going back 5 generations have all died piloting poorly made homemade flying contraptions and when my contraption soars through the air i will succeed where my forefathers failed
That's right... nobody, and I mean NOBODY beats the Lakers 12 times in a row.
What do we think boys
Got a haircut appointment at JC Penney’s tomorrow. If you haven’t yet, follow my page to stay in the loop.
this was my first graphic design job, i think i did great!!
YOU GUYS STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM!!!!
Embiid over Jokic for MVP is still the wildest shit ever.
when i’m stressed out it really helps to hold all the world’s bad news six inches from my face til 2am