Kellalena @topaz_kell
Make me laugh & I’ll love you forever twitter.com/search?q=from%… Joined February 2014-
Tweets353K
-
Followers83K
-
Following9K
-
Likes388K
If I were running the country right now, I’d probably just throw the remote at the wall.
That’s the last time I perform an exorcism on a Friday
Plan carefully. Execute accordingly.
I told two different friend groups today that I’m really sick and i feel like hell. Not one person said feel better! So at least i know where I stand with literally everyone
Me in my 20's: "so nice to meet you" Me in my 40's: "move along, nothing to see here"
My therapist is not familiar with the band Oasis and I'm not sure how I feel about that.
Hear me out, underwear with a beer pocket...
God: no one will ever have to clean if we make space a vacuum Angel: lol what
Autocorrect changed opinion to opossum and now it's backing into a corner and hissing and haven't seen something that accurate in a while.
You don't scare me, you're not a group of middle schoolers I have to walk past
If you’ve ever enjoyed sex while you’re dead inside, wait till you’re dead on the outside too
You know you're getting old when you find yourself genuinely thrilled about your favorite dish sponge coming in a few new colors.
The biggest lie 90s dudes told was that there was something in that wallet that made it worth chaining up
A dry wedding is just like a regular wedding but with no reason to be there
Sometimes you gotta fill the bathtub with rice and sit in it to fix yourself.
funny men with filthy minds are my fucking kryptonite
who you are when your vibrator loses charge is the real you
the sexual tension between your grip around my throat
Honesty is a very misused word nowadays.
if i’m in your twitter circle, welcome to rock bottom
Jetta like the car�.. @JetBomb25
122K Followers 3K Following moody af ⚡️🏳️🌈💅🎶❤️🔥🧀🌈 NO DMS https://t.co/JdUwFtwgVRChelle~ @BombChelleMama_
153K Followers 5K Following Little cheeseburger aficionado. Disclaimer: I am not responsible for how you interpret my tweets.Siren 💫 @CallSignSiren
108K Followers 5K Following Southern girl with eyes on the stars in the southern sky.𝓜53♕ ☠︎ 🌸 @contradiction70
104K Followers 16K Following Whenever I pick up a power tool, I press the trigger twice.Veruca's Alt @AltVeruca
42K Followers 6K Following Bad Egg/ Don't care how, I want it now. venmo: @ veruca-salt-1 cashapp: $altveruca ***tip before you dmtazz @noneofyours99
85K Followers 46K Following Army Veteran, atheist, here to share some laughs, it's the universal language I ❤️Animals #supportmentalhealth squirrel mama ,wildlife rescue 🔥Memphis🔥S̲uper H̲uman A̲ut.. @_indica_sky
45K Followers 2K Following🌷 𝕥𝕚𝕥𝕤.. @good_vibes_girl
65K Followers 4K Following 🐈 spread sheet queen 📈 🚫raw dogging (oreos) 🦖reptar for life🫶🏻 “the dick a girl could get over”Burning Mom ⚡️ @MomOnFire
75K Followers 2K Following Smooth like nitroglycerin. Sidekick to @gingerhotdishRed Riding Hood @RiderofWolves
154K Followers 23K Following My pronouns are, I have a vagina. Conservative before anything else. https://t.co/WpBwMirRaPnatalayhehoo @highprobably1
38K Followers 3K Following This is not the profile you’re looking for. Gemini and Vol for life. Taken not stirred.Tony P. @Tbone7219
43K Followers 19K Following.:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin
55K Followers 3K Following • goth daria vibes • fear does not exist in this bio • muppet enthusiast • reba/dolly 2024 • subscribe •your other mom @difficultpatty
37K Followers 964 Following Bad at hydrangeas. Ibuprofen enthusiast. We write jokes here. https://t.co/sVPCoTC4Pwinspector ratchet @_hood_mona_lisa
19K Followers 7K Following Public menace. Bog Witch. Level 58 Trainwreck. Costco Gold Star Member.Lyfe of Ryley @LyfeOfRyley
30K Followers 13K Following True Taurus. This is where I say whatever I want. No filter. Single AF. @ThatGirlRyley My bestie is @luvhugnkissesClaire Behind The Hai.. @urmumsausername
44K Followers 6K Following PayPal➡https://t.co/Kf0eVciHmW tweets➡ https://t.co/EJvcH671EQElon Musk X-Global @elon_xglobal
30 Followers 506 Following He is the founder, chairman, CEO, and CTO of SpaceX; angel investor, CEO, product architect TeslaScarlett Jones @ScarlettJo215
9 Followers 118 Following DM me with your cashapp tag or PayPal mail for giveaway 🥰Kathy Hudson Edwards @MyInfo44162055
2K Followers 5K Following 💚💙GO HAWKS💙💚 💜💛DAWG FAN 💜💛 JUST BREATHEQuintin Stone @QuintinStone89
161 Followers 131 FollowingBJ (brown Jophiel) @NovocaineBrain
188 Followers 802 Following 'Supervegan'. if i don't reply to you it's because i haven't seen the notification or i'm horrified. Kali life. rated pee pee. odd core.Tawnest @tawnestk
318 Followers 306 FollowingSodapop Stardust @sodapopstardust
94 Followers 257 Following Never let anyone know what you're truly capable of. Being underestimated gives you a tremendous advantage. Having knowledge does not excuse you from hard work.Jessica Beadle 🇬�.. @jjagbeadle
24K Followers 23K Following A bit of an old goat who has nothing better to do in life and needs all the followers she can get. UK based. #ResistDave Johnson 🇺🇲.. @DaveJoh102
64 Followers 918 Following I'm Dave Johnson the winner of the powerball lottery I won $283.3 million I'm giving out $30,000 to my first 2k followers... Approved By Government 🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲Tom144 @pickelseatpple
259 Followers 522 FollowingYippeKiYay @YippeKiYay1
1K Followers 3K Following old account @peaceplay. Building Back Better! #VoteBluePookharaj Khatri @pookharaj
10 Followers 190 FollowingMatt Ward @MatthewWar17843
1K Followers 5K FollowingChad Hardy @ChadHar14662402
1K Followers 183 Following 49 divorced not here to play games or give out moneyAkok Mamer Akok @AkokMamer71467
9 Followers 175 FollowingAlex Sherwin @AlexSherwi76003
41 Followers 63 Following🇿🇦Lucas🇿🇦 @Langboer84
246 Followers 948 Following The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the greatest intention.Tamiami 🦇🪦 @sirius_lee_me
260 Followers 250 Following Recent housewife. Mama bear. I design book covers as a hobby. Not a pro, won't DM you. Married to the love of my life @thebrazenbeard 15 yrs!Robert Hull @RobertH56920965
277 Followers 2K Followingdavidmarhasll @davidmarha96187
208 Followers 173 Followingcarl @dm1000121
34 Followers 522 FollowingMinus802 @minus802
224 Followers 85 FollowingBrandon @Brandon1333689
253 Followers 349 Following I am a CONSTITUTIONAL COSERVATIVE and proud of it! Not interested in crypto or investing! TRUMP 2024 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸Daddi8ig @daddi8ig
722 Followers 1K FollowingSILVA BRISS @SILVABRISS1
15 Followers 60 FollowingRyuujin @Ryuujin09909530
388 Followers 5K Following Gamer; Japanese Culture Fan; MS in Physics - Quantum ComputingPerry @Perryhickey6
1K Followers 4K Following I'm deleting this app bye everyone have fun lieing and scammingBarry Neuenschwander @BarryNeuenschw2
233 Followers 820 Followingd @hendersondj87
0 Followers 107 FollowingBallerchic @ballerchic83
144 Followers 802 Following Married! on here for fun, laughs, and that’s it. love a good gif and meme. No DMs 🚫Kevin Tuck @KevinTu98055509
303 Followers 2K Followingace games @Aceleo666
158 Followers 2K FollowingAlexx @Alexx799510
112 Followers 410 FollowingDaniel @BearMedina99
185 Followers 280 FollowingIamNOTknoWING @IamNOTknoWING48
96 Followers 213 Followingdavey @Daveydejango
107 Followers 1K Following am me just me like a laugh up for most things am straightJetta like the car�.. @JetBomb25
122K Followers 3K Following moody af ⚡️🏳️🌈💅🎶❤️🔥🧀🌈 NO DMS https://t.co/JdUwFtwgVRChelle~ @BombChelleMama_
153K Followers 5K Following Little cheeseburger aficionado. Disclaimer: I am not responsible for how you interpret my tweets.Siren 💫 @CallSignSiren
108K Followers 5K Following Southern girl with eyes on the stars in the southern sky.𝓜53♕ ☠︎ 🌸 @contradiction70
104K Followers 16K Following Whenever I pick up a power tool, I press the trigger twice.Veruca's Alt @AltVeruca
42K Followers 6K Following Bad Egg/ Don't care how, I want it now. venmo: @ veruca-salt-1 cashapp: $altveruca ***tip before you dmtazz @noneofyours99
85K Followers 46K Following Army Veteran, atheist, here to share some laughs, it's the universal language I ❤️Animals #supportmentalhealth squirrel mama ,wildlife rescue 🔥Memphis🔥S̲uper H̲uman A̲ut.. @_indica_sky
45K Followers 2K Following🌷 𝕥𝕚𝕥𝕤.. @good_vibes_girl
65K Followers 4K Following 🐈 spread sheet queen 📈 🚫raw dogging (oreos) 🦖reptar for life🫶🏻 “the dick a girl could get over”Burning Mom ⚡️ @MomOnFire
75K Followers 2K Following Smooth like nitroglycerin. Sidekick to @gingerhotdishRed Riding Hood @RiderofWolves
154K Followers 23K Following My pronouns are, I have a vagina. Conservative before anything else. https://t.co/WpBwMirRaPnatalayhehoo @highprobably1
38K Followers 3K Following This is not the profile you’re looking for. Gemini and Vol for life. Taken not stirred.Tony P. @Tbone7219
43K Followers 19K Following.:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin
55K Followers 3K Following • goth daria vibes • fear does not exist in this bio • muppet enthusiast • reba/dolly 2024 • subscribe •your other mom @difficultpatty
37K Followers 964 Following Bad at hydrangeas. Ibuprofen enthusiast. We write jokes here. https://t.co/sVPCoTC4Pwinspector ratchet @_hood_mona_lisa
19K Followers 7K Following Public menace. Bog Witch. Level 58 Trainwreck. Costco Gold Star Member.Lyfe of Ryley @LyfeOfRyley
30K Followers 13K Following True Taurus. This is where I say whatever I want. No filter. Single AF. @ThatGirlRyley My bestie is @luvhugnkissesClaire Behind The Hai.. @urmumsausername
44K Followers 6K Following PayPal➡https://t.co/Kf0eVciHmW tweets➡ https://t.co/EJvcH671EQNaïve American @nahdude83
403 Followers 678 Following I'm a middle aged man restarting life. I also need help. See my GoFundMe or I can make something for you through my Etsy shoppe below 👇🏽 DM for custom art!Sam @3366bb
20K Followers 1K Following A quiet man with the loudest fucking mind. . 2nd account (@333666bbb)Infocliffmy @InfocliffMy
1K Followers 1K Following Be cool,or get lost,DM OK.professional driver,get away artist. serious inquiries only.part time film location locatererica @ericanextdooor
10K Followers 9K Following making parlays & petting strays • 𝐣𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐤𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞Redkat5000 @Redkat5000
119 Followers 474 Followingjdecory1 @jdecory11
735 Followers 1K Following Awesomeness, just kidding, toxic masculinity, no not really, me too, not that one, the one where I get to play too one, laugh while you canNinisaurus @momoftwocats
4K Followers 2K Following The original chick in a pig suit. Podcast👇🏼https://t.co/eqw7XcsF0KAnnaBanana @annatheenigma
15K Followers 4K Following Queen of Random•Lover of all things Fun•Hippy at Heart•Gypsy Soul•Solar Powered•Loves the Water• Gemini•Butterfly Whisperer•American GirlThe Real Kim Shady @boobalander
2K Followers 656 Following yeah it’s me, ur favorite baddie. anyway, $4 a poundE💕 @mexicanxthighs
109 Followers 135 FollowingAndi @smiles_and_nods
413 Followers 242 Following Andi 2.0 Lost everyone during my Twitter sabbatical. please follow again.Silver Hi99o 🦛 @Silver_Hi99o
2K Followers 5K Following UltraMAGA 🇺🇸 Chicago Bears 🏈🐻⬇️ Chicago Bulls 🏀Chicago Cubs ⚾️ Peloton Junkie 🚴🏻 WWE 🤼♀️ Workout Warrior 🏋🏻💪🏻 Trump 2024 🇺🇸 #FJB #LetsGoBrandonJohn Cougar's Melon C.. @bimbonicwoman
985 Followers 140 Following the ghost of @bitzydimbo 💋 https://t.co/3SQ3Rkdciu 🔞ɴᴏ ᴄᴜᴛs ɴ�.. @damn_elle
23K Followers 11K Following "𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘨𝘦, 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵" - 𝘛𝘶𝘱𝘢𝘤 𝘚𝘩𝘢𝘬𝘶𝘳 💛🌼 #fuckcancerAmy @AmysGotBirds
6K Followers 6K Following Thank you for the gift of your advice. By any chance, did you keep the receipt?swapnu @nairs40
198 Followers 473 Following Single Mom and Working Professional. Raising a boy with humor and love. Obsessed with observing life's little quirks and finding the humor in every situation.🇺🇦Evil Goateed .. @ryno_san
1K Followers 3K Following RN. This is my bio. There are many like it, but this one is mine. Back on this account for reasons that weren't explained.Rene @rowdyjeepgirl
222 Followers 211 Following Jeeping, biking, software developing, rock n rolling, artistic country girl with precision aim. I really joined in 2010, don't tell Elon.Marissa 💚💛 @michimama75
10K Followers 3K Following Parenting tweets. Pittsburgh sports. Peloton obsessed. Pro-choice.Dana Marie @playboyblonde
734 Followers 397 Following just a legally blind type 1 diabetic who may not be able to see you but I can feel you, you feel me?🇺🇦Gnome de Guer.. @Gnome_DeGuerre
1K Followers 3K Following I enjoy overthinking and worrying about things over which I have no control. Neil Gaiman retweeted me. Formerly @ryno_san. RN. #Sober φιλόμαστος now on b skyAndi @andiindarkmode
98 Followers 76 Following formerly @smiles_and_nods It’s gone now and I don’t think I can get it back.Marci Me @marci_me_g
2K Followers 3K Following I rarely interact. If I like I follow. If I don't you're a douche. Oh 🇨🇦 Eh... Udderly proudly followed by @Devincow #LibAFFather Beavis @superkidricca
1K Followers 2K Following I'm the nicest and meanest person you'll ever meet. Now fuck off and have a great day.🙃 Homer J Simpson is my hero and life coachKarenCehulicEichinger @EichingerKaren
1K Followers 2K Following Wife,Mom,Grandma,pet mom,Triple Negative Breast Cancer Survivor, Fibromyalgia, Metal, Horror movies. 59 y.o. Married 32 years. 🎃CashewQueso @cashew_queso
766 Followers 698 Following On today’s episode of I have no idea what I’m doing… https://t.co/p2R6kolXhTJodingersCat-astrophe @JMoneySlimer
2K Followers 2K Following If you think I post a lot of crap, you should see what I delete: Ghost account for @JodingersCatpuggles 💕 @gmeposhpug
3K Followers 740 Following • infp • poet • apolitical 🇺🇲 • humanist 🤍 • 🎞️📺🎶 enthusiast • https://t.co/zPYXFkPnMLThat tired old fat cr.. @BobyKSharmz
1K Followers 3K Following Curmudgeon,coffee and cussing is what life is all about Motorsport and Football fanatic No I won't put on pantsLorazeKim ™ 🏴.. @_KimberleyAnna
1K Followers 904 Following Villainous, cantankerous. They call me NightHawk. I’m everywhere. I’m nowhere. If I don’t text back it’s ‘cause I’m helping Batman, baby #FuckCancerIf I were running the country right now, I’d probably just throw the remote at the wall.
That’s the last time I perform an exorcism on a Friday
You're the fucking light, at the end of this tunnel....
😂🙌 @topaz_kell
Do people that talk incessantly not get sick of their own voice? Jfc.
I told two different friend groups today that I’m really sick and i feel like hell. Not one person said feel better! So at least i know where I stand with literally everyone
Me in my 20's: "so nice to meet you" Me in my 40's: "move along, nothing to see here"
My therapist is not familiar with the band Oasis and I'm not sure how I feel about that.
Hear me out, underwear with a beer pocket...
God: no one will ever have to clean if we make space a vacuum Angel: lol what
Autocorrect changed opinion to opossum and now it's backing into a corner and hissing and haven't seen something that accurate in a while.
You don't scare me, you're not a group of middle schoolers I have to walk past
If you’ve ever enjoyed sex while you’re dead inside, wait till you’re dead on the outside too
In your fucking eyes, is where, I long to be....
You know you're getting old when you find yourself genuinely thrilled about your favorite dish sponge coming in a few new colors.
The biggest lie 90s dudes told was that there was something in that wallet that made it worth chaining up
A dry wedding is just like a regular wedding but with no reason to be there