Mad Hatter Mommy!!! @MadHatterMommy
sometimes funny, full of cheese, chocolate and unpopular opinions; don’t DM please https://t.co/IdtiajUsnd twitter.com/search/from:Ma… @[email protected] Joined August 2014-
Tweets142K
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Followers23K
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Following4K
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Likes159K
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
How many of you have or would be comfortable going alone to a wedding especially when you only ‘sort of’ know the person who invited you?
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Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
My therapist is not familiar with the band Oasis and I'm not sure how I feel about that.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
A girl in my class always has dried boogers on her nose. — My child throwing stones from the comfort of his glass house
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
My 5yo was bragging to his brother about how he does the highest flips on the trampoline. I’m not sure where he gets his need to be better than other people, but he’s mistaken because I’m the highest flipper.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
sometimes i tell myself “jessica you need to stop drinking” but then i remember my name isn’t jessica
Nothing like a last minute to actually get things done.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
It’s 2024 and i’m still overthinking things I did in 2019. Pass me a straitjacket please.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
When I encouraged you to share your experiences, I didn't mean anything that happens in the toilet, but here we are
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
Hot messes in your area looking for way more than you can give
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
I’ve reached the browsing cushions instead of getting work done part of a Friday.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
Buying clothes a size larger to grow into isn’t exclusive to children you know.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
Me: *turns on vacuum cleaner* My cat: this is abuse
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
You: "talk is cheap, actions speak louder than words" Me: *flips you off
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
My kid said she can’t wait till she’s an adult and can eat chips for dinner, and I’m just happy she has some goals.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
Helpful tip: Don’t write out your grocery list while watching a true crime documentary on a husband-murdering wife, or your husband might think you're taking notes when he walks into the room.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
Listen, idk how it works but my bed becomes infinitely more comfortable from the hours of 5:30 am to 8:00 pm.
The urge to peel off the bandaid immediately after putting it on.
My standard ‘5 more minutes’ of sleep is 1 hour.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
Teen: You put “take a nap” on your to do list. Me: And your point is? Teen: Teen: No point. Carry on.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! retweeted
The amount of likes a tweet gets has no bearing on the quality of the content, I tell myself as I write yet another underrated gem...
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@chennaimotorist @MadHatterMommy Is there an open bar?
😂
Adulthood is all about knowing when to give up (now).
How many of you have or would be comfortable going alone to a wedding especially when you only ‘sort of’ know the person who invited you?
My therapist is not familiar with the band Oasis and I'm not sure how I feel about that.
@MadHatterMommy That’s how I do things now because the mess just dissolves into thin air or something.
@MadHatterMommy That last minute pressure just hits different.
A girl in my class always has dried boogers on her nose. — My child throwing stones from the comfort of his glass house
sometimes i tell myself “jessica you need to stop drinking” but then i remember my name isn’t jessica
@MadHatterMommy Me: *2 hours later* Well, I guess I'm not going out early today....
It’s 2024 and i’m still overthinking things I did in 2019. Pass me a straitjacket please.
When I encouraged you to share your experiences, I didn't mean anything that happens in the toilet, but here we are
@MadHatterMommy I so "feel" this! 😉😅
Hot messes in your area looking for way more than you can give
I’ve reached the browsing cushions instead of getting work done part of a Friday.
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