Kyle 🌱 @KylePlantEmoji
I am incredibly online | King of edible leaves, his majesty the spinach | he/him | the hits https://t.co/13Ium8Yy25 St Paul, MN Joined February 2016-
Tweets92K
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Followers139K
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Following1K
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Likes740K
Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come,
Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come,
Gonna get my eye looked at today.. usually it's the other way around
Having the "biggest penis in Britain" has to be a bit like being the tallest dachshund
Having the "biggest penis in Britain" has to be a bit like being the tallest dachshund
"In a civil society, you should get to murder people who inconvenience you"
"In a civil society, you should get to murder people who inconvenience you"
You can fit caviar onto a nugget of cat shit and it's still gonna taste like cat shit
You can fit caviar onto a nugget of cat shit and it's still gonna taste like cat shit
Can't actually turn this into a full track because the stems are kinda dog shit but thought you might enjoy this; thee together a lil mashup of 80s hits: We Belong by Pat Benetar and Your Love by The Outfield
Genuine explanation for this is that MM/DD/YYYY goes in order of specificity. There are only 12 options for months, 31 for days, and then literally thousands of options for years. Whether or not you find that intuitive is almost entirely based on what you were raised with ofc
Genuine explanation for this is that MM/DD/YYYY goes in order of specificity. There are only 12 options for months, 31 for days, and then literally thousands of options for years. Whether or not you find that intuitive is almost entirely based on what you were raised with ofc
Tik Tok User: I bet if I pronounce this word in a silly way I'll get thousands of people commenting and drive up my engagement, making me more money Everyone: holy shit this person says this word SO fucking silly
Tik Tok User: I bet if I pronounce this word in a silly way I'll get thousands of people commenting and drive up my engagement, making me more money Everyone: holy shit this person says this word SO fucking silly
"this eclipse has got me thinking about we were also a perfect fit together, but I was blocking your light"
The fact that it's so easy to confuse etymology and entomology is just one of those linguistic bugs
Absolutely insane that the word "one" and "once" are pronounced the way they are. Ridiculous. Can't help but oneder how this happened.
Software engineer here, specifically front end web dev I don't know what the fuck this means
Software engineer here, specifically front end web dev I don't know what the fuck this means
Pandas in the zoo:
prance @bocxtop
277K Followers 1K Following former backup jv quarterback current ?? [email protected]
1984’s George Whore.. @EwdatsGROSS
135K Followers 2K Following unfortunately extremely online | senior creative, 2x cat mom, former emo kid & niche internet micro celebrity
abby govindan @abbygov
179K Followers 1K Following mgmt: [email protected] personal:agovindan97@gmail | i reply to DMs on passes | #sagstrong
Natalie @jbfan911
66K Followers 711 Following (in case my employer sees this) I love ethics and HIPAA | she/her
Big Tucson Dad @BigTucsonDad
56K Followers 2K Following When all else fails, all roads lead back to margaritaville. Cohost of @MinorBreakdown. the blue check is for ad rev, I hate Elon
jon drake @DrakeGatsby
112K Followers 2K Following they must have amnesia, they forgot that im him. 1/2 of @blastzonepod. senior brand strategist for @trymetafy
rudy betrayed @rudy_betrayed
38K Followers 1K Following if you follow me you agree with all of my opinions
Roxi Horror 💀🌸 @roxiqt
65K Followers 1K Following Extremely online internet gremlin & comedy content creator 🥄💜 @roxiqt on Bluesky & TikTok 🦝 https://t.co/JbrOVGHJgp ✨
phil @PhilJamesson
84K Followers 985 Following my job is writing funny things for cool stuff | comedy for @DibsNext, @adultswim, @nerial, @dropout | mgmt: [email protected]
madimoiselle ♡ @drivingmemadi
40K Followers 557 Following like a furby, but worse. unfortunately all views are my own
aubrey @aubviouslynot
12K Followers 244 Following bi (she/her) | 18+ | a Wednesday the cat fan account
Cian 🇮🇪 @nodrectionhome
3K Followers 3K Following sad-eyed lad of the lowlands. 20. https://t.co/Lj8D18lnyH
PolarBearfacts @kidsanimalskids
43 Followers 113 Following The Arctic is not a forsaken wasteland to a polar bear; it is home, and a comfortable home at that. ( Ian Stirling )
Uncork'd Entertainmen.. @uncorkdent
4K Followers 6K Following Home Entertainment and Theatrical Film Distributor | #horror #documentary #foreign #scifi
Confetti the Clown Co.. @cow_confetti
15 Followers 8 Following 🎉The name's Confetti🎉 Join me as I bumble through battlefields, stumble through simulators and trip over trivia in my chaotic corner of the internet!
Craven Moorehead @doordaesh
389 Followers 651 Following hey man we're posting here, shut the hell up and watch Oh hell yeah dude. LLR
Cassie🧶 @Cas_clouds
221 Followers 3K Following lvl 24 | Chaotic L2d artist, crocheter and home cook | 🔞 please | “Mama" to @VaccinialCargo and @Hound_Of_Hel (pfp from @_Milkmoo)
Agony Christie @TuppysMom
779 Followers 1K Following Mom to Tupper (OTRB 12/6/17). Motorcycle rider. Introvert. Smile at me, I'll smile back, though. Trying to not be a worrywart in life. I swear a lot.
Red eye thoughts @redeyethoughts
26 Followers 139 Following
SUE BALLEW @BallewSue
334 Followers 468 Following Married. Min Pin lover. Morality. Mandalas. Museums. she/her. https://t.co/1MQ9Zp0oC4
Zachary Weller @zacwel
3 Followers 19 Following School psychologist, gear head, mechanic, Masters of Science, underdressed, chronically online, special ed (provider), behavior tech, tired
Dr. Evil @ImSoFuckinCorny
46 Followers 127 Following I have a whole bag of 'shh!' with your name on it.
Zayn Izik Hassan @IzikZayn
6 Followers 155 Following
Jane Alice ❤️🇺.. @Jane_Alice_
52 Followers 2K Following I’m a Professional Reputable Artist 🌿 #Furry / #Protogen / Pfp / Sfw|Nsfw / 2D|3D / Animation in very Reasonable prices
ଓ༉‧.⭒ֶָ֢�.. @Salute10__
0 Followers 615 Following
taylor 🗡️🌹 @turnintoabat
49K Followers 1K Following i'm pretty sometimes and have brain damage all the time ✨ bi HEMA chick ⚔️🏳️🌈⚧️
Aman 🇵🇸 @mightaswellcode
245 Followers 922 Following he/him • 23 • @OfficialUoM Research Software Engineer • @softwaresaved fellow • @openlifesci mentee • @iris_hep fellow • @CIC_DelhiUniv IT & math • views my own
William Glory @WilliamGlo61007
12 Followers 112 Following
palsy @kidwpalsy
190 Followers 1K Following 28 nb but not reddit about it. I make porn, music and write mostly I just wanna be left alone lol
Shrug_Shrugsly @shrug_shrugsly
27 Followers 242 Following I just learned something 🫣WAIT!🤔False alarm🤤 //// For learning, visit my Xtwitter : “Shrug Shrugsly@whateversnottaken” 📲
beroncey @BeRonCey10
136 Followers 228 Following he/him. fan. BBN. UTFT On Cinema at the Cinema. #Gregghead Radiohead's best song is Creep.
ed @ed_hills1
0 Followers 113 Following
kbgreenland @kbgreenland
216 Followers 3K Following “Books are paper sandwiches for the mind and you are hungry” - Maureen Johnson
Ghost Guys @Kerryaic23
3K Followers 5K Following Ok, fine. I’ll do my bio. Vote blue. Trump is insane. Voice for innocent animals. Music is everything 💙
neat robot @dinnersruined
2K Followers 290 Following
Dalton @DaltonDoubting
24 Followers 157 Following
TheCapricornGent @T_djwhiz
68 Followers 658 Following Amapiano Dj | GSBW Founder 👕 IG:@official.djwhiz @gsbwcouture.co
Clara Francis 🇺�.. @ClaraFranc86277
678 Followers 2K Following I’m Clara , I’m Trans lady, hoping someone will love me like this
greentuna @greentuna
248 Followers 1K Following
Soph @Sophers927
0 Followers 25 Following
ezra 🍉 @liivingdeaad
9 Followers 48 Following
Alex Arturo @turin_turin94
16 Followers 122 Following En mi familia me llaman Arturo, mis amigos me dicen Alex.
killara112 @killara112
73 Followers 752 Following I’m sorry for the lil followers ,got hacked so I had to start again ,At the movie 🍿
Meiboo Bagou @BagouMeibo10305
3 Followers 72 Following
Dave Johnson 🇺🇲.. @DaveJoh325
151 Followers 2K Following I'm Dave Johnson the winner of the powerball lottery I won $283.3 million I'm giving out $30,000 to my first 2k followers... Approved By Government 🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲
James Bella @Bella61310James
50 Followers 271 Following
michaela okland @MichaelaOkla
287K Followers 296 Following Just a Girl, girling out [email protected]
prance @bocxtop
277K Followers 1K Following former backup jv quarterback current ?? [email protected]
1984’s George Whore.. @EwdatsGROSS
135K Followers 2K Following unfortunately extremely online | senior creative, 2x cat mom, former emo kid & niche internet micro celebrity
abby govindan @abbygov
179K Followers 1K Following mgmt: [email protected] personal:agovindan97@gmail | i reply to DMs on passes | #sagstrong
Natalie @jbfan911
66K Followers 711 Following (in case my employer sees this) I love ethics and HIPAA | she/her
Big Tucson Dad @BigTucsonDad
56K Followers 2K Following When all else fails, all roads lead back to margaritaville. Cohost of @MinorBreakdown. the blue check is for ad rev, I hate Elon
jon drake @DrakeGatsby
112K Followers 2K Following they must have amnesia, they forgot that im him. 1/2 of @blastzonepod. senior brand strategist for @trymetafy
sloane (sîpihkopiyes.. @cottoncandaddy
128K Followers 1K Following writer, editor, marketing-er, sales-er◦ former editor at @funnyordie ◦ nehiyaw ◦ canadian ◦ any pronouns
rudy betrayed @rudy_betrayed
38K Followers 1K Following if you follow me you agree with all of my opinions
Roxi Horror 💀🌸 @roxiqt
65K Followers 1K Following Extremely online internet gremlin & comedy content creator 🥄💜 @roxiqt on Bluesky & TikTok 🦝 https://t.co/JbrOVGHJgp ✨
phil @PhilJamesson
84K Followers 985 Following my job is writing funny things for cool stuff | comedy for @DibsNext, @adultswim, @nerial, @dropout | mgmt: [email protected]
taylor 🗡️🌹 @turnintoabat
49K Followers 1K Following i'm pretty sometimes and have brain damage all the time ✨ bi HEMA chick ⚔️🏳️🌈⚧️
Mike Bong @WeirdBongs
23K Followers 5K Following (He/Him) Weird bong and pipe maker. As Seen On @vice and @60secdocs . Twitch Streamer, Wrestling, Guitar Hero and more.
COVID and Cambria @BoringDrew
5K Followers 5K Following Filmmaker/Writer/Musician. I'm here to make you think about death and get sad and stuff.
IFY @IfyNwadiwe
106K Followers 3K Following Thot Dad™ | Comedian and Actor who writes TV shows, Video Games, and TV Shows about Video Games | Host of @umactuallyshow and (Redacted) on @dropout
SARAH SQUIRM @SarahSquirm
106K Followers 3K Following 🤡 sarah sherman on @nbcsnl 🪱 😛 come see me on tour 𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐄 + 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐇! 🧠
Yo Gabapentin @SomeTweeter420
3K Followers 2K Following the most California sober guy | ❤️ @curiocactus// 📸 @yophototakin
Dubbz @playdubbz
10K Followers 498 Following Elevate your game with secure wagering and discoverability $DUBBZ Discord: https://t.co/fAl7RsDqXh
Aeris (The least thou.. @EzioHanitore
645 Followers 1K Following Just a slut for da movies 27, Pansexual trans girl, She/Her 🏳️🌈 🏳️⚧️ NSFW account: @AerisExposed
🇵🇸 timothy 🍉.. @crulge
51K Followers 4K Following Go down any road far enough and you'll come to a slaughterhouse, but keep going and you'll reach the sea. healthcare newsletter: https://t.co/2DvHaC24rj
Palette Swap @PaletteSwapMag
5K Followers 31 Following The true colors of gaming & entertainment news // Gaming & entertainment news of a different color.
simone ! @parasocialyte
7K Followers 1K Following i have many thoughts opinions and interests | links in linktree | they/she ✡︎ for a free palestine
gilbert @memetazaa
8K Followers 2K Following real guy | italian🇮🇹 | virgin | loser | bald | 5'8 | forbes worst 30 under 30 | i love my girlfriend
They Are Online @PostingNormally
172 Followers 182 Following Private for that one they/them you know
Daggerlad @Daggerlad2
36K Followers 953 Following Stories to tell your grandchildren. @lilmeaties factory worker
Transphobes can't rea.. @LordAslanThe2nd
14K Followers 2K Following they/them Blocked by Jordan peterson, End Wokeness, Matt Walsh, Dave Rubin, Andy Ngo, Chris Rufo, Libs of Tik Tok So much for the free exchange of ideas.
ToonHoleChris @toonholechris
23K Followers 4K Following He/Him. Story on features by day/other stuff by nite: Comics - https://t.co/ImbvZGaypG Music - https://t.co/2Luq55HWov
worm food 🇵🇸�.. @frogs4girls
18K Followers 1K Following anna | she/her 🏳️🌈 | 25 | cutie pie | astrophysicist | virgo | jew for a free palestine | life’s more painless for the brainless! | pls be nice to me
Pyramid Chad @pyrameadhead
7K Followers 747 Following Communist, mead making guy, cosplayer. He/they. Married, monogamous. Bsky - https://t.co/S9wPKZKgZa
Thembo @OnlyAWorldAway
12K Followers 4K Following Beloved and renowned expert on all things unusual. They/them
pokey pup @Whatapityonyou
22K Followers 4K Following
horse dentist @equine__dentist
30K Followers 882 Following horse god formerly known as balthazar the exalted
Nate Purkeypile - The.. @NPurkeypile
19K Followers 407 Following A heavy metal horror game where you hunt monsters from folklore. 🤘🏹🔥Wishlist The Axis Unseen on Steam: https://t.co/CnSM7YlkqM Before: Skyrim, Fallout, etc.
xenofish @Xeno_Fish
42 Followers 74 Following
gregory house apologi.. @transcowboy
18K Followers 574 Following 64 years old, medical malpractice enthusiast, james wilson lover, legally dead
Muad’Denk @DDenkler
1K Followers 1K Following he\him • Drew • I do the voice of your favorite character and make dumb videos • BLM • opinions and jokes are my own https://t.co/LswDneDFGl
Sam the Tranquil @SamtheTranquil
80 Followers 99 Following Sam the Night Owl, but with more mundane and personal takes
Leen McBeans ꪜ @LeenMcBeans
13K Followers 7K Following ✨Good intentions, questionable methods✨ Recovering academic. Mother of Dad Jokes. A third fun sounding thing. 🏳️🌈
Accidental Bronson @AccidentalBron
68K Followers 16K Following Things that sound like Action Bronson lyrics
kels @sharkedupdown
246 Followers 105 Following
sword gf @punishedgarage
7K Followers 746 Following the most beautiful, the most popular, the most bulimic girl at the warren commission reunion spring fling • @ranneychrist ❤
beer person @CantEverDie
132K Followers 2K Following JUNE - L’CHAIM - TRANS DISINFO INFLUENCER - podcasting on @WesternKabuki & @CrateDiving - streaming games on https://t.co/kXjet8u2M2
alex 🐀 @tinysnekcomics
74K Followers 564 Following comics about tiny animals and political justice - polisci phd candidate @UCDavis - @BrennanCenter alum - rat verified - watching too much tv (he/him/his)
worms cited @christapeterso
59K Followers 3K Following Philosophy PhD student. very powerful. love birds (she/her) 🐝
Dina @dinahashem_
29K Followers 1K Following allah’s lil angel, NYC comic. Watch my new special Dark Little Whispers on Amazon prime
Annie Wu⸆⸉ (all s.. @Annie_Wu_22
47K Followers 2K Following 📍usually PHL | always online // digital + social @AOC @RepAOC @WorkingFamilies @AAPIVictoryFund @HelenGymPHL @johnfetterman @PAStandsUp views my own | she/her
making fun of students bravely putting their lives & futures on the line to protest a genocide is just a little laugh but do NOT come for her personal branding!!!!
The freaks attacking that woman for being body slammed from a place of White Privilege are of course right that there’s nothing you can say to stop a cop from attacking you: “I’m a professor,” “I’m 12,” “I'm your wife,” “this is my house an you broke in,” “woof woof woof,” etc.
I LOVE the idea of shadowboxing in front of someone when you meet them for the first time. I wonder if other people do stuff like this when they meet Trump. I’d probably show him how long I could hold my breath or how low my resting heart rate is honestly
Israel has lost Ken Bone
Ken Bone coming out of retirement to be based 8 years later was not on my 2024 bingo card
Scrolled past this like 10 times without realizing who posted it
For everyone cheering on the crackdowns at the university protests, don't forget the ketchup.
I have to stan her 😭😭😭
Just had drinks with coworkers and The Regret Of Everything I Did and Said That Was Weird is setting in
Who among us has not volunteered for a racial segregationist's political campaign for work experience?
baseball twitter has a new Kiké Hernández problem
it’s 7am it’s been cat on cat crime all night
fellas is it woke to not die from cardiac arrest
Phone boxes refurbed into defibrillators… what a time to be alive 🙄
My gf doesn’t like it when I compare her being raised Hasidic to me being a theater kid but I was cast as the lead in every school musical which makes me the chosen people
@KristiNoem when i say i got that dog in me, i mean Kristi Noem wants to kill me
i know this is bait and i shouldn't respond to it but: if you are a manager and your subordinate is doing their assigned work to a high standard and your concern is that they should be doing more work, maybe you should assign it to them. otherwise what exactly is your job
Olive Keogh: Quiet quitters are hard to handle because they continue to complete their assigned workload to the same (often high) standard, giving their managers an uneasy feeling but nothing specific to complain about. irishtimes.com/business/work/…
I am the same age (35) that Johnny Cash was when this photo was taken. I'm convinced people in the past were like rubbing gravel into their skin to make them look old as hell
Teen slang tier list S - lock in, rizz A - my bad, W, queen B - yap, ate, goat C - skibidi, bruh, cap D - fruity, gyat, mewing F - alpha, beta, sigma, bop
i didnt know the last time i went into Gladstone Pizza would be the last time I went in
hi it’s pizza week free of charge and in no order, here are the best pizza places in Portland Blind Onion Pizza Nostra Dove Vivi Gracie’s Apizza Otto’s Gladstone St. Pizza
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