not now @6SenseIsCommon
What's it like being Snobby without a sense of humor? It's like jumping out of a car without a parachute - You're just an idiot & nobody wants that. twitter.com/search?q=(from… Joined August 2021-
Tweets20K
-
Followers828
-
Following435
-
Likes31K
not now retweeted
If they're not scared to lose you, keep them. They're the smart ones.
2
40
45
2K
4
not now retweeted
It’s refreshing to see that this app is still full of vast knowledge. I just saw someone talking about how you can get a grape out of your nose.
not now retweeted
Heated car seats: One of life’s greatest technological achievements. You get a heated back massage, a warm ass and by the time you get to work, you’re less stabby. It’s saving your back, your ass and lives.
not now retweeted
Me without coffee: Morning everyone, thank God it’s Friday. *mumbles, walks away. Me with coffee: Morning you fabulous fuckers, it’s finally Friday! Let’s do this. *probably still mumbles but with less attitude and a croissant.
not now retweeted
Keep in mind if I bend any other way things start getting weird
not now retweeted
If you absolutely must tell me about your colon polyps… bring a puppet
not now retweeted
Cupid draws his bow and aims at my heart Me: you break it you buy it
not now retweeted
How to get your man to quit complaining about throw pillows
not now retweeted
Remember when you could remember?
not now retweeted
Welcome to your 50's. You're now too old for young people and too young for old people.
not now retweeted
If it ain't fixed, don't break it.
not now retweeted
There are only two parts in a year. The one between returning from vacation and going back on vacation, and the shitty part.
not now retweeted
Due to inflation, the world’s 10 wealthiest people got nearly half a trillion dollars richer in 2023. You'd think inflation is a bad thing...
not now retweeted
Not now. I’m sipping hot cocoa and counting snowmen.
not now retweeted
Good morning to everyone, especially those who handle soft hearts with care.
not now retweeted
Roses are red Sky is blue I mind my own business So should you.
not now retweeted
My testosterone levels have dropped so much I started watching Bravo
not now retweeted
Have you tried a walk along the boardwalk of your favourite lake town about it?
not now retweeted
i swear i want to be a better person but people won’t let me
not now retweeted
Nothing sexier than a partner whose words water the garden of your peace and arms keep the storms of life away.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! @MadHatterMommy
23K Followers 4K Following sometimes funny, full of cheese, chocolate and unpopular opinions; don’t DM please https://t.co/IdtiajUsnd
The Ciscokidder @TheCiscoKidder
36K Followers 12K Following 99% jokes, 100% Stay home dad, atheist, BLM, feminist, pro LGBTQ+ and left af. https://t.co/HpCbHaktUa
💯ℂ𝕣𝕒𝕫�.. @Crazy_ButCute2
248K Followers 14K Following I lift things up and put them down. I love food. I look good naked. link in bio 💁🏼♀️ SLE/Fibro warrior! Every day stronger 💪🏻❤️💯
tazz @noneofyours99
85K Followers 46K Following Army Veteran, atheist, here to share some laughs, it's the universal language I ❤️Animals #supportmentalhealth squirrel mama ,wildlife rescue 🔥Memphis🔥
Alfie @DownFrontArtist
54K Followers 48K Following There is no show without business. https://t.co/X2EN341vnk
gas statіon dream g�.. @cheygoulet
22K Followers 5K Following kind of like a goomba, but with slower reflexes
мя gяєєη @iGreenGod
93K Followers 3K Following Mentally unfit. #ChatGpt #Copilot & #GoogleBard Professional Read #TheSanatanStories
nice things I say to .. @meantomyself
28K Followers 8K Following Hopeful idiot | your big suburban | Log Lady | X's hottest mom™️ | tired founder. Not funny or young enough to write tweets for Clorox. avi @popartcartoonz
🌌kristina 🌌 @inurnightdress
6K Followers 5K Following Alex Turner's favorite mistress/Samuel L Jackson of moms/B's snotty little muse https://t.co/FXGDC5Fus0
𝐀 𝐌 𝐀 𝐍 �.. @littlegiinge
66K Followers 18K Following I'm a silly kinda weird.. Coffee please? -`ღ´- https://t.co/OMVnn385QH
Jules @julcasagrande
78K Followers 7K Following Q ⚔️ energy. coffee cups and thoughts https://t.co/V349QaXUGV
paused mortem 💀 @LeeCram
12K Followers 4K Following life's foul-mouthed casualty • ig/alt: @pausedmortem
ρꪮꪮ𝓳ꪖ 🌸 @YourSomeone11
49K Followers 3K Following I lost my identity, I found myself. 📸 Mine https://t.co/djB5pKALgp
Kylo Ken @starwarsstanboy
7K Followers 7K Following Lightsaber smith.Nerd. Gamer. Dobie dad. Cosplay. Artist.Stage 4 cancer/BMT survivor. Allergic to your cat. Kings/Yankees/Broncos #starwars
Tipsy Angel Smoo🤍�.. @blonde_opinion
124K Followers 6K Following a kind person who occasionally likes pineapple on her pizza
♡ Eve ♡ @evecullen610
29K Followers 9K Following gently, touch me with your words (my tweets...my words)© •she/her• #oneforever
Charlesetta Alkana @charleset_alka
64 Followers 5K Following
Anja Bugarewicz @AnBugarewi
64 Followers 5K Following
Lilly-anne Zawacki @ZawackiAnn89834
89 Followers 5K Following
Samara Madero @MaderoSama33678
68 Followers 5K Following
Ayana @Loughs338392
46 Followers 155 Following
Estefana Dowlen @estef_dowle
71 Followers 5K Following
SAINO @THESAINOFAMILY
126 Followers 5K Following
Octavia Hollingshed @HollingsheOctav
42 Followers 5K Following
Fatimah Heuvelmann @FHeuvelma
66 Followers 5K Following
Pilar Bonavia @BonaviaPil25539
12 Followers 3K Following
Sherryl Petersen @SherrylPet38350
26 Followers 5K Following
Michael @michaelwCSC
91 Followers 692 Following
Eshal Retterbush @EshalRette6995
81 Followers 5K Following
Lola Appl @LolaAppl44541
75 Followers 5K Following
Taliyah Rojas @taliyah_ro57248
118 Followers 3K Following
Alaina @cookalaina86
239 Followers 3K Following
Nick @tgoon1373Nick
70 Followers 918 Following
Luis Gomez @GomezLuis44663
332 Followers 4K Following
Emma Scott @EmmaScott
14K Followers 12K Following Costume designer, bacon connoisseur, news junkie, foul-mouthed hockey fanatic, altruist, lover-of-naps, & dirty hippie. Preferred pronoun: y'all.
Marquita Johnson @JohnsonMar48801
119 Followers 3K Following
MAKUWA SANNEH @SannehMakuwa1as
89 Followers 5K Following My name is makuwa Sanneh I’m from the Gambia I love meeting new people. Let’s get to know each other more and share ideas. Learn new experiences 🙏
carabella mia @chris1983green
657 Followers 1K Following
Sharonsm @Sharonsm13
17K Followers 2K Following
Amanda Maxwell @AmandaMaxw97971
118 Followers 3K Following
Kylie Jenner @KylieJe41772993
5 Followers 100 Following My name is Kylie💋💓if you are in need of my service my rate is not high👌❣️♥️
Oh Nothing… Just Ho.. @HornyJust1
303 Followers 2K Following
Hiền Trần @HinTrn44939515
1K Followers 5K Following Tôi năm nay 60 tuổi.truoc năm 1978 có đi thanh niên xung phong ba năm giờ đã đứng tuổi ở nhà chăm lo cho gia đình..
Min Jeong @Jeongofficial02
138 Followers 2K Following Success isn't about how much money you make. It's about the difference you make in people's lives.
Christine Obert @cdpsolutions1
2K Followers 2K Following I used to be a scientist. Since I hit menopause, now I’m a mad scientist. Go Cougs. https://t.co/dc7XhKyIjM
raja shaker @rajasha79628696
22 Followers 410 Following
Claim Airdrop 🎁 @ClaimAirdrop23
458 Followers 5K Following
Lily-anne Symore @SymoLily
58 Followers 5K Following
K. 🕊🐾 @KMHKoala
988 Followers 949 Following Animal lover (so you're going to see a lot of them). Nature, antiques, art, humor, Bono. Curious about the unknown. Not sure how I got here.
May @maraldo_may
109 Followers 3K Following
Ch.muzaffarabbas@gmai.. @Chmuzaffarabba4
764 Followers 3K Following
Ira Murumi @ira_murumi
7K Followers 4K Following ⚠Explicitly satirical! Accidentally entered a twitterverse and have made myself home since then. /FUB free/No DM/.
Dakon 💚💜✨ ✨ @trillionsoFAces
15K Followers 16K Following ~ ✨🫰💥 👁️🫵awaken! ✨👀🔎 Spiritual Success 📚: “Mr. Dakon Greenhart”!🪞graphic designer 🌩⚡️⚡️punk soul with hippie tendencies✌️ 🥀🌸 human among all else 🖖
Gabriel Lora @Gabriel24943372
36 Followers 258 Following
Deadpool @bagonedeepak
90 Followers 1K Following
🪐🇺🇸 TRUMP 20.. @MaryOThompson1
19K Followers 21K Following #CHRISTIAN •here for President Trump only 🇺🇸 #KAG •Building The Life I Want 👌• #BuildTheWall • #MAGA •Married❤️💍 #1A.
Grimm Creator Stephen.. @creator_grimm
8K Followers 7K Following Writer-Director. Grimm, Ocean’s Eleven, Blue Streak. Rep UTA. #1 Bestseller “A BLOCKBUSTER” Entertainment Weekly: https://t.co/YKlNAVDb4n
Selina Neithercutt @neithercut52589
71 Followers 5K Following
Tonight Laundry @TonightL94358
593 Followers 4K Following I’m a bad person. I’m a troll. I only log on when I am truly sad. Happy to see your POV, however. also, if you are a real person let me know. I’ll apologize.
Stephanie Nunez @StephanieN38174
99 Followers 3K Following
Comedy Dinosaur @comedydino
551 Followers 2K Following Everything comedy. standup, bits, memes, pictures, quotes. retweets.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!! @MadHatterMommy
23K Followers 4K Following sometimes funny, full of cheese, chocolate and unpopular opinions; don’t DM please https://t.co/IdtiajUsnd
The Ciscokidder @TheCiscoKidder
36K Followers 12K Following 99% jokes, 100% Stay home dad, atheist, BLM, feminist, pro LGBTQ+ and left af. https://t.co/HpCbHaktUa
💯ℂ𝕣𝕒𝕫�.. @Crazy_ButCute2
248K Followers 14K Following I lift things up and put them down. I love food. I look good naked. link in bio 💁🏼♀️ SLE/Fibro warrior! Every day stronger 💪🏻❤️💯
tazz @noneofyours99
85K Followers 46K Following Army Veteran, atheist, here to share some laughs, it's the universal language I ❤️Animals #supportmentalhealth squirrel mama ,wildlife rescue 🔥Memphis🔥
Alfie @DownFrontArtist
54K Followers 48K Following There is no show without business. https://t.co/X2EN341vnk
gas statіon dream g�.. @cheygoulet
22K Followers 5K Following kind of like a goomba, but with slower reflexes
мя gяєєη @iGreenGod
93K Followers 3K Following Mentally unfit. #ChatGpt #Copilot & #GoogleBard Professional Read #TheSanatanStories
nice things I say to .. @meantomyself
28K Followers 8K Following Hopeful idiot | your big suburban | Log Lady | X's hottest mom™️ | tired founder. Not funny or young enough to write tweets for Clorox. avi @popartcartoonz
🌌kristina 🌌 @inurnightdress
6K Followers 5K Following Alex Turner's favorite mistress/Samuel L Jackson of moms/B's snotty little muse https://t.co/FXGDC5Fus0
𝐀 𝐌 𝐀 𝐍 �.. @littlegiinge
66K Followers 18K Following I'm a silly kinda weird.. Coffee please? -`ღ´- https://t.co/OMVnn385QH
Jules @julcasagrande
78K Followers 7K Following Q ⚔️ energy. coffee cups and thoughts https://t.co/V349QaXUGV
paused mortem 💀 @LeeCram
12K Followers 4K Following life's foul-mouthed casualty • ig/alt: @pausedmortem
ρꪮꪮ𝓳ꪖ 🌸 @YourSomeone11
49K Followers 3K Following I lost my identity, I found myself. 📸 Mine https://t.co/djB5pKALgp
Kylo Ken @starwarsstanboy
7K Followers 7K Following Lightsaber smith.Nerd. Gamer. Dobie dad. Cosplay. Artist.Stage 4 cancer/BMT survivor. Allergic to your cat. Kings/Yankees/Broncos #starwars
Tipsy Angel Smoo🤍�.. @blonde_opinion
124K Followers 6K Following a kind person who occasionally likes pineapple on her pizza
♡ Eve ♡ @evecullen610
29K Followers 9K Following gently, touch me with your words (my tweets...my words)© •she/her• #oneforever
Emma Scott @EmmaScott
14K Followers 12K Following Costume designer, bacon connoisseur, news junkie, foul-mouthed hockey fanatic, altruist, lover-of-naps, & dirty hippie. Preferred pronoun: y'all.
Christine Obert @cdpsolutions1
2K Followers 2K Following I used to be a scientist. Since I hit menopause, now I’m a mad scientist. Go Cougs. https://t.co/dc7XhKyIjM
K. 🕊🐾 @KMHKoala
988 Followers 949 Following Animal lover (so you're going to see a lot of them). Nature, antiques, art, humor, Bono. Curious about the unknown. Not sure how I got here.
Ira Murumi @ira_murumi
7K Followers 4K Following ⚠Explicitly satirical! Accidentally entered a twitterverse and have made myself home since then. /FUB free/No DM/.
Bae West @mommywhitfield
11K Followers 4K Following 'Let them eat cake,' she said, just like Marie Antoinette. @fatanddumb1984 supplies my orgasms
Jeff Jacobs @JeffreyPJacobs
86K Followers 74K Following Caught Me Between Bourbon & Cigar Pairings. Former Brand Guy. Threads: jeffreypjacobs. Blog at @PromoCorner. Enthusiastically Bad Golfer. #YelpElite @yelp
🪐🇺🇸 TRUMP 20.. @MaryOThompson1
19K Followers 21K Following #CHRISTIAN •here for President Trump only 🇺🇸 #KAG •Building The Life I Want 👌• #BuildTheWall • #MAGA •Married❤️💍 #1A.
MY CAT's A HO @Saltygirl64
402 Followers 912 Following My cat's yowling & reality trash tv helps my depression, I fear Hurricanes, #BrainAneurysmSurvivor, #KentuckyStrong
Charly Chow 📝👾�.. @whatcharlywrote
2K Followers 5K Following 🌸 Light seeker & friend to kind hearts ✍️ poems in Curio Cabinet, Duck Duck Mongoose, Lothlorien 🚫no DMs ❤️ @mattatronics
🌺Tita🍍🌈✊�.. @VTTPacificTita
8K Followers 850 Following ✨Will fk your Dad and make you my step kid✨ Deleted at 26k 🥺 USNavyCombatVet. MBA. AutismMom. Irreverent AF. https://t.co/DSfa9OImya
Kayla Chow Show @KaylaChowShow
47K Followers 15K Following 💙 Survived my mid-mid-life crisis. //SUPER MARRIED//BOY MOM//CATS//TACOS//SUNSCREEN//BEER//MURDERINO//LACTOSE INTOLERANT// 💙VENMO @ Kayla-Chow-Show
Lori Is Here @CornjerkerLori
8 Followers 9 Following
LoriAgain @again_Lori
4 Followers 4 Following
What are you going to.. @1999_jab
3K Followers 4K Following Just here for the lols/snark. If I lol I follow. Dad to 2 teens. Cat wrangler, gas-station hot dog connoisseur. A little lead guitar. What a time to be alive.😬
🪓ℙ𝕒𝕥𝕣�.. @thebrazenbeard
3K Followers 2K Following I write books, and I fix things. Books can be found at my link. I'm possibly 3 penguins in an overcoat. Married to @sirius_lee_me
J Las @xntrickmisery
1K Followers 2K Following hitRecorder, horror movie addict, I don’t litter and I smoke a lot of weed 🍕
Lemon Squash Soda @l3m0n5qu4shs0da
1K Followers 895 Following
Lindy Vogel @TheLindyVogel
2K Followers 5K Following Failed model. Mom of 6. Words: @PregnantChicken @MontereyBayParent @businessinsider EiC Sweary Mommy on @Medium.
Justan Jesse @justan_jesse
2K Followers 2K Following Design Lead at JLL. Drummer. Disciple. Twin Dad.
Reuben @Retired5_O
3K Followers 5K Following Retired Law Enforcement with 35 years of service. US Air Force (Disabled) Veteran.
Thomas @NoSignalStatic
162 Followers 392 Following A fine line between thought-provoking and needlessly edgy content.
Libra Moon. @JamiePitbull96
3K Followers 5K Following I follow back. I create quotes 🫶 Artist. Bisexual. 27. Shitposter. Reptile Enthusiast. Insta: libra_moon1996. Fb: Jamie Breanna Libra. Snap: pitbull_libra96.
CanadianLitChick🇨�.. @ConnieLukey
26K Followers 23K Following I am Pavlov's Hashtag dog. Mother of boys, passionate reader, writer, funny fitness fanatic, CPA. Happily married and older than dirt.
Draggin Father Behind @DragginFatherB
2K Followers 1K Following Dad of 3 under 10 whos at most a 6 with an 11 scale wife just keepin it comical & muddlin thru. Fueled by 🥃 & ☕. Featured on @TheDad, @todayshow, @huffpost
The Fledglings Contes.. @The_Fledglings
2K Followers 1K Following 🐥 For accounts under 2K followers! 🐣 Contest runs Friday AM to …?? Avi/Header by @Invisichad
Lucky ⭐️ @DoubleA33
45K Followers 9K Following former troublemaker trapped inside a professional nerd
Fomo Simpson @HaliPhacks
8K Followers 3K Following Keeping it funny on Twitter since its early days as a radio show. My tweets ➡️ https://t.co/Z2tnWjzeDx
MAGA Nation @slstevens24
21K Followers 23K Following Father, Patriot. End times in fight for democracy, the right side of history. God & family. Courage in the face of evil, together we must save America 🇺🇸
mim is glad it's spri.. @mimrebel
3K Followers 3K Following Rebel Scum, Mom, Legos, Geocaching, Flowers, Gardening, All Things Purple
Angela G. Cameron @ang33angela33
313 Followers 2K Following Im a sarcastic fun loving person with a great sense of humor!
Kris @sassybiatchkris
463 Followers 258 Following NSFW. Tits, ass, etc . I'm taken & definitely not interested in your dick. I'm a veteran, mc rider, & ally to LGBTQ+ & BIPOC communities.
Tyra Zafar ♥️ @tyrazafar
5K Followers 6K Following Canadian 🇨🇦| Animal Lover | Raptors 🏀 Blue Jays ⚾️ TFC ⚽️ | #KnowYourTrueWorth 👑
immortalitycult @immortalitycult
387 Followers 939 Following Immortal Humor and Cutting Edge poop jokes.
Rubi Diamond @RubiDiamond21
108K Followers 6K Following Never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut.” 💕💋💋💋CASH APP $DIAMOND4656
em jazzin cats @EmiAirHeart
905 Followers 647 Following I'm worse in real life. https://t.co/eDhO2pQB5L
Case of the Mondays @MondayCase
332 Followers 135 Following (Former) Themed contest to make Mondays suck less. 🍻 Shut down until Elon sells. 🎉🍺🙌
LookeyLou @InternetShrew
1K Followers 3K Following Just trying to make the apocalypse more entertaining . Anti-Communist. GOP is a limp weenie. Men aren’t women. No DMs.
Tay 🦇 @ayeotay
746 Followers 778 Following Taylor. She/her. 28. Mom x2. Wife. Pisces. Horror fanatic. Iced coffee enthusiast. ✨
AutumnSkye @AutumnSkye13
3K Followers 2K Following Melancholic coffeeholic, a bit poetic, always neurotic. Happily married to my soulmate @i2o ♥️9/24/22♥️My sleeping schedule is like a 14 yo dick, always up and never when I should be
If they're not scared to lose you, keep them. They're the smart ones.
My mom has been in the hospital for almost three weeks now, my sister and I are with her constantly. I had to leave to go home to eat and get some sleep and I’m sobbing cause I can’t fix this. I can pray, advocate, fight but fixing it is out of my control. Love the ones you love.
It’s refreshing to see that this app is still full of vast knowledge. I just saw someone talking about how you can get a grape out of your nose.
Heated car seats: One of life’s greatest technological achievements. You get a heated back massage, a warm ass and by the time you get to work, you’re less stabby. It’s saving your back, your ass and lives.
Me without coffee: Morning everyone, thank God it’s Friday. *mumbles, walks away. Me with coffee: Morning you fabulous fuckers, it’s finally Friday! Let’s do this. *probably still mumbles but with less attitude and a croissant.
So, Willie Nelson just started following me on TikTok. Be. Jealous.
Them: Put some eyeliner on and deal with it. Me: Can it be last night's eye liner? Like is smoky eye still a thing?
sometimes the horror community reminds me that some of us are chronically online and should collectively go outside and touch grass
Pork butt in the oven with a brown sugar based rub I made and a bottle of Sam Adams Octoberfest I found in the back of the fridge. My house smells so good. Pulled pork for dinner at 6. Bring a side dish.
Keep in mind if I bend any other way things start getting weird
If you absolutely must tell me about your colon polyps… bring a puppet
Cupid draws his bow and aims at my heart Me: you break it you buy it
How to get your man to quit complaining about throw pillows
Welcome to your 50's. You're now too old for young people and too young for old people.
There are only two parts in a year. The one between returning from vacation and going back on vacation, and the shitty part.
Due to inflation, the world’s 10 wealthiest people got nearly half a trillion dollars richer in 2023. You'd think inflation is a bad thing...
Trends for United States
639 B posts
259 B posts
128 B posts
14,2 B posts
259 B posts
63 B posts
5.594 posts
30,4 B posts
48,2 B posts
59,4 B posts
5.595 posts
33,7 B posts
28,9 B posts
39,4 B posts
24,4 B posts
6.831 posts
16,4 B posts
You might like
Houston Hard Hitters
@TXRednation01
2K Followers
Not You Again.
@NotYouAgain66
1K Followers
Neener Neener Neener�..
@neenertothe3
3K Followers
The Unruly Misfit
@TheSpotter8
2K Followers
ʍǟȶȶ ȶɦɛɛ cru..
@mattonaroof
4K Followers
Aaron King
@A_AronKing
5K Followers
Adrian Dad
@StyloDad
5K Followers
Turtle Sprints
@TurtleSprints
3K Followers
Jennay Gump 🦐 🍫..
@jovialjennay
2K Followers
Mushrooms & Onions
@drewpetrou
3K Followers
\m/🇨🇦
@drwhotfaskedyou
1K Followers
Taco Biscuits
@bgschnikelfritz
6K Followers
K Squared
@thatdentaldude
3K Followers
Lord Vulgaris
@VulgarisInsanis
946 Followers
Jeff the 4th
@grayskies365
707 Followers