gnome "will never get his comeuppance" chompsky @nihilists4jesus
radical space mormon, pope of mormon chili town mailchi.mp/1c0866943622/c… high fiving a million angels Joined April 2020-
Tweets4K
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"You cyclists screw up all the streets!" the warrior yelled from his gleaming chariot. His fury burned at the thin men in lycra. How feminine they looked in their tight clothing and head protection!
if I were living in feudal Japan and someone told me to slice my own guts open I’d be like uh arigato but no arigato
I tend toward abolitionism except that I believe littering should be a capital crime
I know God isn’t real because Gordon monson gets to tell people he is a professional writer
I know God isn’t real because Gordon monson gets to tell people he is a professional writer
is it okay if I say that one of the great tragedies of history is that the Prussians defeated the Austrians in the battle for control over greater Germany
the world is so beautiful and we get to live in it
one thing about me is I’m that bitch who loooooooooooves to meander. catch my goofy as just ambling about town!!!!!
I have said this before but it must absolutely whip ass to be a pigeon in the big city.
we need to bring this haircut back for men
professional theologian here. you are experiencing what we call a "job" situation in which god is letting you suffer to win a bet with the devil. my expert recommendation? curse god and die.
professional theologian here. you are experiencing what we call a "job" situation in which god is letting you suffer to win a bet with the devil. my expert recommendation? curse god and die.
this is what I look like if you even care
He explained this already in the sign
He explained this already in the sign
incorrect, gaston was a proto communist and the village will be overwhelmingly blessed by the return of a benevolent aristocratic ruler bestowed with divine right, even if he looks like a gay habsburg
incorrect, gaston was a proto communist and the village will be overwhelmingly blessed by the return of a benevolent aristocratic ruler bestowed with divine right, even if he looks like a gay habsburg
just wait until the missionaries show up at every single one your doorsteps tomorrow
just wait until the missionaries show up at every single one your doorsteps tomorrow
;) @lmaoxdlol0
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A @AprilOwens3572
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french canadian shai .. @c0dymavr1ck
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President Joe Bison @JoeRBisonJr
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chica barnes @i_mean_really
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Mikey G @therealkinjin
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Ben Kay @benkay47
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Dwight D. Eisenhower @IFrickinLoveIke
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Professional Yapper�.. @NeverM0re666
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Rachelle @Rachelle_F
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Delanie @Surly_Temple
532 Followers 2K Following Terribly short and terribly rude. she/her. I eat. I read. I write. I rant. I cherish The Snack Club.
Johannah Palomo @JohannahPalomo
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エリオット cowbo.. @Elliott28091nig
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Tanner Wilcox @wilcox_tan78641
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Clint @clintsimmons
415 Followers 379 Following I just want to be left alone, except for when I don’t. Libertarian. Hablo español
Incensed Papist @IncensedPapist
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Jason Allen @TerreJason
67 Followers 391 Following
SurfSkateThrash @SurfThrash
14K Followers 8K Following Survivor. Banned for sharing music that is accessible on YouTube. Born during a Ramones set. 🎶 I was a surfer I had a skateboard backup: @surfskatethrash
NYU-gawa @BYU_craiggers
939 Followers 759 Following “Look at this face, broken by the system.” Board certified sinternist. Pulm/crit fellow. @saushecimres @wustlmed and @byuamstudies grad. Diet Coke. #Mormon
Jean-Michel Connard �.. @torriangray
21K Followers 2K Following Irritable in the streets, unable to sleep between the sheets. Senior contributor to my underfunded 401(k). 2006 runner-up Britain’s best bum of the year
Linda Hamilton @lhamiltonwriter
1K Followers 303 Following She/Her. Historical Gothic Horror Writer. Feral housewife. Mormon feminist. History nerd. Rep: Rach Crawford at Wolf Literary
emily @emilykmay
34K Followers 3K Following "mid and delusional" | doubt-filled believer | peak millennial | girl's girl | unfortunately very sincere
StevenP @SciHoroscope
1K Followers 420 Following Evolutionary Ecologist/Writer/Poet. In a constant state of awe at the wonder of the Universe(s). At amazon: https://t.co/4PkM3e4tB9 he/him/his
Sunshine Jarboly @SunshineJarboly
5K Followers 1K Following eagle trainer. puppy petter. drinker of milk. taker of naps. author. artist. my books available at https://t.co/tNhRJoHok6
Acts of the Apostles @actsofapostles_
6K Followers 964 Following Documenting the acts and sayings of all 103 modern day apostles. Thomas B Marsh to Patrick Kearon. Currently working on Apostle #52 Richard R Lyman
Stealymann @StealyMann
777 Followers 563 Following @GetAlternative’s Businessman - s’go mets/s’go devils/s’go ravens - he/him @RichardStaff’s Goomar/Life Partner
⛳️ Jalenooperdogg.. @JalenooperDogg
1K Followers 745 Following Professional Amateur Golfer | #GoCougs 🤙
Surprised Eel Histori.. @greenleejw
36K Followers 269 Following Surprised historian, not surprised eels. Doctor of Medieval History. Talkin' 'bout eels, maps, my kids & my dog. Maps on commission: https://t.co/ZmGIhKXK52
Amanda Jacobsmeyer @JacobsmeyerAJ
483 Followers 659 Following Media Strategy @InkHousePR. Tweets a hot mess of politics, Taylor Swift, Mormon drama and occasionally my job. she/her. [email protected]
Noah Smith 🐇🇺�.. @Noahpinion
321K Followers 1K Following Writes about economics, posts about rabbits. For serious opinions/analysis, read my blog: https://t.co/KfUxUlCYPz
Brandy Jensen @BrandyLJensen
150K Followers 2K Following See that she chews her food well, and sets her foot down firmly on the ground when she walks, and you're all right.
moll-ad’dib @molllllusk
4K Followers 2K Following 🍉dominic sessa’s biological mother. amanda knox dni
Oliver Dahl @OliverWDahl
30K Followers 4K Following Published novelist & photographer. Fan of neon signs, small towns, and good art. A bit unconventional. https://t.co/qq4oeEmNRn
chris wei (he/him) @therealchriswei
995 Followers 1K Following phd candidate @ univ. of iowa; author; editor; teacher; tutor; artist; postmormon; socialist. my books, articles, podcasts, albums, & videos are @ https://t.co/1ECAfPyZSL.
The Utah Pig Bus @UtahPigBus
6K Followers 3K Following Pork roasting tailgate professionals. @utah_football fanatics. 2X @collegegameday guests. Visiting fans welcome to join. Guardsman Lot. Go Utes!
Brittany G @Fibby1123
2K Followers 3K Following I tweet for myself. Amusing you is just an added bonus. || Utah Man | Insomniac | Awkward | Pedantic know-it-all | Stat nerd | Mediocre gamer | she/her
jaclyn @j_n_foster
13K Followers 4K Following genetics BS➡️history MA➡️PharmD student | 🌈👩👩👧👦 | 🇨🇦➡️🇺🇸 | antimicrobial stewardship 🦠 | what you get when you order “pharmacist” on Wish | any/all
Scott Drakeford @TheDrakeford
2K Followers 4K Following Rise of the Mages from @torbooks // Former corporate stooge, engineer // Rep: @MattBialer // Co-host of @PublishingRodeo
Taco Bell Quarterly @TBQuarterly
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Borscht the T is sile.. @InternetHippo
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Recovering Govvie @singrdave
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Populism Updates @PopulismUpdates
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Lead Actor from Pixar.. @ByYourLogic
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Eastern European Cart.. @EasternOoC
227K Followers 73 Following Soviet and Eastern European animation mostly pre 90's | war sucks 💙💛 | host @redwaytoo | https://t.co/lApL31fOl0
uh oh, the nut jobs who feel threatened by people on seven pounds of aluminum have found my tweets
Rumors are true. New hat and sweatshirt.
THEY MADE FUN OF MY CYBERTRUCK
@GordonMonson imagine saying this to muslims or jews about their faith
I didn’t have any time to yell curses at cyclists today because I’m busy taking the young men camping at the beach.
lol I thought the hating cyclists thing was a bit for twitter not something you interrupt your day to do in the real world
@Adam__Alba Sitting in a 7,000 lb testament to man’s hubris and yelling at bikes for wrecking the road is an objectively great bit though.
And though he fought with strength and skill, the win was bitter in the warrior's mouth. For he knew the war had only begun. Would his thumbs flag from the tireless tweeting against bicycles? When dawn breaks, would he have the strength to defend his stupid-ass truck?
The soft men astride their two-wheeled steeds were no match. Heads low, they begged for mercy and forgiveness. Victory claimed, the battlefield hushed.
"You cyclists screw up all the streets!" the warrior yelled from his gleaming chariot. His fury burned at the thin men in lycra. How feminine they looked in their tight clothing and head protection!
@nihilists4jesus Did you recently yell at cyclists from your Cybertruck?
@nihilists4jesus "But who's gonna pay for your plumbing when it breaks?" Landlords after a long hard day of hiring a plumber for $200 after already making $11000 off the property:
Gnomo arigato Mr. Roboto
if I were living in feudal Japan and someone told me to slice my own guts open I’d be like uh arigato but no arigato
Based Carol Oates
unless you are desperate, it is never a good idea to summon police officers. these are armed individuals who have gone into police work because they like to "control"--(could be "bully," "manhandle," "assault")--others who are usually no threat to them. when there is actual…
Me, to me when I look at his profile and see I already had Manhattva blocked.
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