Myrna Tellingheusen @PearlsFromMyrna
NOW ON MASTODON @[email protected] Retired executive secretary for Mr. Stanley Bogenshoots, Senior Vice President at Hughes Aircraft. Vaca Muerta Estates Joined September 2015-
Tweets19K
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Followers147K
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Following90
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Likes22K
I may have not read all of the Holy Bible, but I have read the parts that mattered.
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Be aware of people you’ve never seen before walking the neighborhood without a dog. I’ve seen some sketchy people lately.
Dear World, DON’T MAKE ME TURN THIS CAR AROUND
Successful habits like regularly cleaning my bathroom mirror place me in a closer relationship to God.
People with two first names strike me as indecisive.
People were more polite when we had three networks and Magnavox consoles.
Accordion music never fails to put some pep in my step.
I am currently pasteurizing my worries.
Today, for Earth Day, l used a manual toothbrush. (Did not have one so l fired up the Buick, drove to Safeway on the scenic route, purchased the toothbrush, took the scenic route back home and partook in my personal Earth Day celebration. Manual. Toothbrush.) 🌍
Muriel waved to me with a full dog waste bag in her hand. I consider this a macro-aggression.
My real age is nobody’s business, except when it comes to senior citizen discounts.
My nephew Lyle insists tomorrow is a holiday.
Paula said she was leaving our prayer group. We all said that we were sorry to see her go, even though we didn’t mean it.
Free Advice Re Teamwork™️ Carefully review an acronym before you launch it publicly.
If it says “scrub-free,” don’t believe it.
Where have all the marble cakes gone?
Please be quiet. I'm changing my typewriter ribbon.
People call them “friendship coffees” or “social gatherings.” I call them Grudge Rolodex Updates.
The Gormogons @Gormogons
16K Followers 3K Following Global Terror. Val Kilmer. Hello Kitty. Policy. Politics. Vampires. Poland-Lithuanian Irredentism. Anti-Esperantism. Six posters: CZ, GP, GorT, MN, ŒV, & ℞.
Annie Hatfield @AnneHatfieldVO
48K Followers 6K Following Tall, pale, relentlessly cheerful. https://t.co/vhLLPJmuO2
Salty MacTavish 🇺�.. @SaltyMacTavish
13K Followers 9K Following We hardly talk about clams anymore and frankly I’m steamed about it https://t.co/MEeOiowPL2
Blanche Swartzendrupe.. @swartzendruper
2K Followers 1K Following Resident of Vaca Muerta, can my own jam, avid birdwatcher, I don't flock around, Bingo Champion, I know how to handle the balls! Taught Vanna White how to knit.
Lizzy @LizzyLouWhom
5K Followers 665 Following I love dogs 🐾 • the Minnesota Vikings 💜🏈💛• Cupcakes 🧁• and Incandescent Lightbulbs 💡• Owner of a ridiculously adorable Basset Hound 🐶🇺🇸
Smatt - ס מ א ט �.. @mdrache
10K Followers 4K Following Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me, As plurdled gabbleblotchits, On a lurgid bee, That mordiously hath blurted out, Its earted jurtles, grumble
ℒ @FletchMatlock
4K Followers 597 Following
Maryfairyboberry🧚�.. @maryfairybobrry
44K Followers 7K Following Mom Humor, Nonverbal Autism, Adoptee Journey, Ocean
SpacedMom @copymama
25K Followers 3K Following Writer of freelance copy. Cultivator of small humans. Documenter of absurdity. / Header by the talented @mommy_cusses
Andrew Young - TANSTA.. @NucMM1retired
5K Followers 3K Following Never apologize! Seeking “Dad joke” Singularity, happily married, #UkraineIsAPyramidScheme #chinaisasshoe #PutinIsAsshoe #HamassIsAsshoe #HesAFed
Joycie Cougar 🍋�.. @JoycieCougar
774 Followers 529 Following Newest (and youngest!) resident of Vaca Muerta Estates, Phase 3B (the “good part”). Perky and fit. I love to party! My meatloaf brings the boys to the yard.
Clarence “CJ” Jac.. @CJ_Delivers
2K Followers 458 Following Postal Carrier for Vaca Muerta Estates, model rocket enthusiast, widower. Somebody keeps fooling with my hummingbird feeder.
Uncultured Purrl @AmericanPurrl
4K Followers 4K Following Retired USAF Missileer. Finally(!) completely retired Oncology RN. Plan to die alone surrounded by cats, as nature intended.
Sunshine Jarboly @SunshineJarboly
5K Followers 1K Following eagle trainer. puppy petter. drinker of milk. taker of naps. author. artist. my books available at https://t.co/tNhRJoHok6
Marly @VerbsRProudest
10K Followers 5K Following Mom, Wife, Scribbler - Tweets https://t.co/fmOqFyUryK OR exc replies https://t.co/oKTHFtbaqK header by talented friend @bucmarvin
Late to the party Lau.. @ericamorecambe
4K Followers 1K Following I’m not sure that it’s me who’s late or you who is early. On IG with same name. Also https://t.co/JnR26LsGSQ
Alexandra F. Baldwin @VerumVulnero1
4K Followers 651 Following Mom, Sister, Quasi-Mom. South Side born and raised (for real). Big City Public School kid. Credibly Accused of being an Arms Dealer![I was a snowball in hell. [he/him] I'm now a problem you can throw money at: https://t.co/wV6uDObiYO](https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/742195299523792897/zHMQ_4-f.jpg)
Bacon, Lettuce & Pota.. @DominicCaruso1
3K Followers 3K Following I was a snowball in hell. [he/him] I'm now a problem you can throw money at: https://t.co/wV6uDObiYO
shorthand academy @ShorthandHub
50 Followers 157 Following Here, i'll translate your Notes, Diaries , Quizzes , written in Pittman Shorthand, Gregg Shorthand or Teeline Shorthand. feel free to DM
Elizabeth L.W. @ElizabethLayn07
41 Followers 110 Following “What is done in love is done well.” -Vincent Van Gogh
Jacob de Wolff 🇳�.. @jfdwolff
12K Followers 12K Following Acute physician @lnwh_nhs, husband & dad, Wikipedian, Hirschian, yekke (sometimes late). @RCPLondon joint RA NW London. Own views (lots), no clinical advice.
Tianne Pierce @Tiannegaroo
9 Followers 100 Following NICURN/Nursing instructor- still learning how to roller skate backwards. California raised & working in the high desert. Give me golden hills & palm trees.
Amish NASA @derpdedooo
179 Followers 287 Following Everything I say is true except the things that aren't. All of my tweets are poems. I am immortal and I only eat cheese. THE MOON BELONGS TO ME.
Hollie Harris @allholls
531 Followers 182 Following Writer. Mom. Storyteller. #GenXer. And apparently the person in charge of what's for dinner until the end of time.
🥧 Pastriarchy 🥧 @pastriarchyer
12 Followers 230 Following "There will be another dream for me Someone will bring it I will drink the wine while it is warm And never let you catch me looking at the sun..." 💔⛈️🎂
Noah @Noah8280684927
25 Followers 542 Following
kaysia gotelli underh.. @UnderhillKaysia
37 Followers 187 Following
Edith @Evadne44427
38 Followers 1K Following I am a lively and cheerful girl who would like to meet a good friend.
jenna talia @jennafrmthebloq
12 Followers 135 Following
My own thoughts @hamilto12843_jb
50 Followers 428 Following I like funny stuff, 🎵,people who try to be good humans & knowing about the world. Take action & act up in equal measure as needed. Political Junkie in relapse.
Nicholas Perez (see p.. @ZephonSacriel
2K Followers 3K Following White 🇨🇺 writer of SFF. My short story THE WHO BECAME AN ENTIRE PLANET in TO ROOT SOMEWHERE BEAUTIFUL is out now!
Laura Wiles @laurARwiles
39 Followers 155 Following Raised by Texans in Arkansas. Oklahoma State and Texas A&M. LeadAR Class 19.
Forbidden Planet @AzimaAZA
133 Followers 280 Following Love: Books, SciFi, Fantasy, Horror, Manga, Anime, Coffee, Spotify, YouTube, TWITCH. Have a pleasant day 😊
Kali Ma Nocturnia @Chamberdeth
46 Followers 920 Following
DarkHolmePublishing @kerryholme30196
715 Followers 5K Following Shadows linger, heroes rise. 🌑 Seeking dark fantasy and horror chills with fresh perspectives for submissions. ✨ We want to hear YOUR story. 📝
Taco Enthusiast @enthusiast84590
9 Followers 23 Following
anxiousfangs ☾⋆�.. @anxiousfangs
652 Followers 2K Following she/they • ♎️ • (au)dhd • i hiss at children minors dni • terminal case of astarion brain-rot • will graham apologist
perpetually lost @lostvalley0
2K Followers 3K Following fondling my pains and in relationship with words and my mirror soul https://t.co/pXWlE7Eqsz
Ibrahim Abu Tuaima @ITuaima
444 Followers 3K Following I have a heart full of love and happiness for every wonderful person to follow me. ##. I am from Palestine 🇵🇸 Sad, please follow me❤️🇵🇸😭😢😢😭
DeDoodler…🌻☮�.. @DeDoodler
48 Followers 130 Following I cancel in the last minute, True crime junkie, a foodie, cook, reader…yada yada..besides I hold a degree in sarcasm
Mary Mills @mhmills51
426 Followers 288 Following
Rebecca Gunder @gunder_reb50753
11 Followers 43 Following
nemo @cebadams
270 Followers 2K Following Time Traveller. Currently moving forward at breakneck speed. I am nobody, hence, nemo (n.) Latin, literally no man, no one, nobody
Munib Gill @munib_gill61590
96 Followers 462 Following
Harrison @Harriso84914988
42 Followers 526 Following Turning dreams into plans. 🚀 | Adventure seeker | Coffee enthusiast ☕ Chasing sunsets and dreams | Digital storyteller | Making memories around the world 🌎
Michelle Burton @burton_mic713
32 Followers 77 Following I’ll never be the subject of an episode of Dateline.
Sander van Leeuwen @KLM644_ams
13 Followers 284 Following
David Brennan @DavidBr03575539
196 Followers 453 Following
Holly Volkman @HollyVolkman1
0 Followers 2 Following
These Two Cats @OP_Twocats
156 Followers 261 Following
x - 𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚝�.. @Martini_Shot_
7K Followers 8K Following #IATSE 🎬#LAKings 🏒🏆🏆#Dodgers💙 #Saints 𝑑𝑖𝑎𝑙 𝑢𝑝 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝕒𝕨𝕖𝕤𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝕓𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕜 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕜𝕟𝕠𝕓 𝕠𝕗𝕗!
Andrew M. Siegel @DrewSiegel65
4 Followers 24 Following
Zulqarnain Zahid @ZahidZulqa60558
20 Followers 48 Following
Kellie Leigh💙 @ArtistsUnitedWW
251K Followers 231K Following Follower of Christ~Now Booking @jc3music ~*Founder #MusicLov3rz Music Mag & Radio~†1 Corinthians 13:4-8†
Paige Louise (obe) (s.. @paigepseudonym
105 Followers 589 Following Deej DCD Dyspraxic. She,her,a him?Shehasrisen alilboy’ssoulgobshitebrat! scebbi lil ahrtist-writer +Anne’sFrankAdrianMole Diaries 🎒🌸🌻🌼 Gondi Fish
Jeannine McDevitt @JeannineKMc
193 Followers 719 Following
Leanna @leanna1017
468 Followers 2K Following NJ girl in AZ. Love knitting, crochet, canning, raising chickens, Jane Austen. Conservative & Catholic. Happily married. Lost mom to Covid19.
Jason Perverse and Fo.. @revjpoling
728 Followers 1K Following “God is our very peas, and he is our suer keper when we be oure selfe at unpeas, and he continually werkyth to bryng us into endlesse peas.” —Julian of Norwich
Rev. Jeff Doucette�.. @EnniskillenTyr1
181 Followers 301 Following I am part of an Affirming community of Faith in Tyrone, Ontario committed to loving everyone & not afraid to work for justice. I am also a #Bluejays fanatic.
Annie Hatfield @AnneHatfieldVO
48K Followers 6K Following Tall, pale, relentlessly cheerful. https://t.co/vhLLPJmuO2
Salty MacTavish 🇺�.. @SaltyMacTavish
13K Followers 9K Following We hardly talk about clams anymore and frankly I’m steamed about it https://t.co/MEeOiowPL2
Clarence “CJ” Jac.. @CJ_Delivers
2K Followers 458 Following Postal Carrier for Vaca Muerta Estates, model rocket enthusiast, widower. Somebody keeps fooling with my hummingbird feeder.
WittySassBasket™ @WittySassBasket
23K Followers 3K Following the realist bitch at this junior league function
Gabby Hayes @RealGabbyHayes
3K Followers 1K Following Old Sourdough, Prospector, Moonshine drinker. Writer for Fine Bunkhouse Livin' and 49er Style.
Rich Harrington @McNarstle
6K Followers 6K Following Somebody's gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes!
Meggan Van Harten @Meggan_DDP
86 Followers 76 Following Accessibility-Focused Designer & Business Leader | Partner & Strategic Leader at Design de Plume | She/her
Wisdomathome @Wisdomathome1
231 Followers 559 Following
SpankyDony @DonySpanky
2K Followers 5K Following Don Spanky, a/k/a #DonPoorleone Only POTUS impeached twice. Government Politics #DeepState #InaneMAGANews #VoteBlue “Let’s not become the evils we deplore.”🗳🌊
Dr. Glaucomflecken @DGlaucomflecken
711K Followers 438 Following Ophthalmologist. Comedian. Speaker. Tiktok. Contact: [email protected] *Personal views only* https://t.co/GMXSgqZUvF
Akanksha Saxena @akankshasxn
6K Followers 4K Following Editor @DWnews. Award winning journalist. Ex @BBCNews @TRTWorld. @ICFJ fellow “In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act.” -George Orwell
Nicole Rawkin @NRawkin
18 Followers 301 Following
David Fahrenthold @Fahrenthold
776K Followers 6K Following Investigative reporter for the New York Times, focused on nonprofits. Tips? [email protected]
NSDebbi (she/her) @nsdebbi
686 Followers 1K Following Faith+family rule. ♥️ music, red wine & live theatre. Proud Admin. Professional. My tweets are my own so don't believe everything you read. https://t.co/aLMuVXTlOB
Bridget Phetasy @BridgetPhetasy
365K Followers 8K Following Verified nobody. My tribe is tribeless. Find another hero.
Murphy Webster @MurphyWebsters
7K Followers 38 Following Lives across from Myrna and Lyle. Salty old retired cop. Enjoys the finer beers in life. Stay off my lawn.
Randy Havens @MrRandyHavens
132K Followers 639 Following Taylor Swift fan account. Also I do acting #StrangerThings #GotG3 #Stargirl
Arlene Dickinson @ArleneDickinson
382K Followers 459 Following I’m told I look a lot like that woman on TV.
Lois Weintraub @WeintraubLois
2K Followers 112 Following You know that .01% of bacteria, Lysol doesn’t destroy? It will kill every last one of us. You mark my words.
Tom Beer @TomBeerBooks
15K Followers 5K Following Editor in chief @kirkusreviews, @bookcritics member, former books & travel editor @newsday. Ask me what I’m reading.
Kevin O’Neill @KevinBuffalo
57K Followers 2K Following Feature Reporter & Broadcast Meteorologist @WGRZ. Recovering Buffalo Sports Fan. Autism Dad.
James Breakwell, Expl.. @XplodingUnicorn
944K Followers 841 Following Father of daughters. Owner of pigs. Writer of books: https://t.co/V7JWbsTXJ9
Jay Michaels™ @jaymichaels
3K Followers 868 Following I talk🎤 on @mix965Houston & @Hits1063 … I Love True Crime🔪 Shows & Chinese🥡 Food & 🍸’s… Terrified of 🐿! 🏳️🌈🇺🇦🔯 #Bahai #ASMR
Frank DeCaro @frankdecaroshow
13K Followers 3K Following Author, "Disco: Music, Movies, and Mania Under the Mirror Ball" and "Drag: Combing Through the Big Wigs of Show Business."
Ranae Holland @SkeptiScientist
28K Followers 641 Following Speaker | Writer | Co-Host #FindingBigfoot Inspiring the next generation of naturalists #scicomm #TEDxSpeaker
erin mccann | @mccanner
17K Followers 5K Following breaking news and internet ephemera at The New York Times.
Eric Renshaw @EricRenshaw
245 Followers 936 Following I think I'll use twitter to maximize my earnings potential and leverage my core competency.
JOE DOE 😷 @MORNAFAN93
1K Followers 304 Following Pseudonym. I don't argue - I just block. [email protected]
Lyle Tellingheusen @nephewlyle
14K Followers 64 Following Temporary part time parking valet. Full time Stay at Home Nephew. (@pearlsfrommyrna) Check out my Precious Moments bongs on Etsy.
Jim Spellman @jimspellmanTV
8K Followers 2K Following Was CNN Denver, now CGTN DC. Drums in @VelocityGirlDC . Guitar man in @foxhallstacks . I mos def don’t speak for my employer or anyone else. He/Him.
Henry 3000 @Henry_3000
31K Followers 12K Following Bad but not evil. I asked @JacCarly and she said, YES. 💍
Alfie @DownFrontArtist
54K Followers 48K Following There is no show without business. https://t.co/X2EN341vnk
🎙Laura Steele🎙 @RealLauraSteele
15K Followers 6K Following I talk for a living 92.5 The Fox in Cincinnati & 104.5WJJK Indy 13INsideTrack host on WTHR Lifelong Pacers fan 🏀 Colts Emcee 🏈 Columbia College Chicago Grad
Russell Brandom @russellbrandom
11K Followers 3K Following US Tech editor for @restofworld -- formerly @verge. [email protected] I want to talk very plainly to you, so that we are both comforted by the honesty.
Scott Linnen @ScottLinnen
17K Followers 2K Following Hamburger Helper. Because a severed hand told me to.
you @MissZindzi
19K Followers 1K Following Top notch clothes get the top of the dresser. header by @itsaleois
Doris Pumpergast @RaccoonLady_
11K Followers 416 Following Corner lot of the Vaca Muerta Modular Home Estates.
alice @alicefrmcroom
568 Followers 385 Following We don't have to agree politically to be friends. You do have to love animals, though. Otherwise I view you as a psychopath. Please spay and neuter your pets.
Michael Totzke 🐞�.. @TotzkeM
1K Followers 1K Following Writer/editor/playwright/actor/singer; happily mated (to Barry); beagle lover (down to one, sweet lemon Archie); often cranky; not as young as I used to be
Emily Deans MD @evolutionarypsy
21K Followers 4K Following Psychiatrist, most likely not yours. Cats and dog. Longhorn 🤘🏻 political centrist bound to annoy everyone
William_ShaRtner @Blarebare
6K Followers 3K Following @SonOfCha calls his sloppy-seconds 'noogies'? I try to put on those airs and act real cool. But I’ve got to realize that I’m acting like a fool.
gaslawsandpropofol(sh.. @sassistheword
11K Followers 8K Following tweets are not serious nor medical advice unless they are, figure it out. inappropriate humor is a coping mechanism. hostile vermin. man hating cunt
Grinch @GrinchLaw
1K Followers 681 Following Was a full time lawyer. Now a full time fundraiser. I just want to live in my cave away from all the Whos in Whoville.
@PearlsFromMyrna The retirement of console televisions left many ceramic cats and doilies without a home.
We lost our precious Cooper today. He went down hill so fast. They say words cannot express the sense of loss and grieve. “They” are right. He was a Gentle soul. A true and loving friend. The pain is unbearable. I don’t think that I have anymore tears. So I will call it a day and…
His name is Goose, and he's going home for the first time..🐕🐾🥰
@PearlsFromMyrna why are these not called Rice Krispies Treeps??
You're a handsome woman, Myrna. And this framed needlepoint (which I spent hours stitching) is just in time for Easter gifts for neighbors!🌷 CraftyMe#
Why “move on” when you can hold a delicious grudge?
@PearlsFromMyrna They always win, because Love Wins!
@PearlsFromMyrna Let’s have a lead paint night at the senior center and invite the grandkids
The young people in this halftime show sure have a lot of cartilage left
@PearlsFromMyrna Be sure to edit out the part on side effects. That will squash your cheerfulness immediately. PriceToPay#
What a long day… Had my 18th abortion, went to a drag show, and got my 14th booster all before lunch. Then I watched my kids play a couple of basketball games. I wrapped up my night on the monthly antifa zoom meeting in which I wore my mask to be safe. Can’t wait to see…
@PearlsFromMyrna Anne Merple takes credit for doilies she did not make. Susan Weller is indiscriminate and showboater when it comes to tipping. If you happen to pass Signal's kitchen window on some late nights you can smell her devils cabbage hippy brownies being cooked. It's a disgrace.
@PearlsFromMyrna A certain singer and certain sports person are rumored to be dating.
@PearlsFromMyrna Edna’s casserole is Costco and breadcrumbs out of a tube. And margarine.
@PearlsFromMyrna I don't like to repeat gossip so listen carefully the first time.
@PearlsFromMyrna My next-door neighbor is having an affair with the pool boy
@PearlsFromMyrna Oooh the things I could tell you. Nothing about you though, dear Myrna.
@PearlsFromMyrna Janet’s poorly refrigerated clam dip was the culprit for causing the city-wide bout of gastritis 3 years ago at the polka festival jamboree.
@PearlsFromMyrna My neighbors are having a cookout. And it's cold outside.
@PearlsFromMyrna I’m wearing yesterday’s undies.
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