Hayley Ellman @HayleyEllman
Comedian/ writer She/her hayleyellman.wixsite.com/hayleyecomedy Joined March 2011-
Tweets901
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Followers550
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Following583
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Likes5K
Bruh eating eggs with chicken in it is a psychedelic experience
This is what genocide looks like. These are the 2913 Palestinian children killed by the Israeli military this month, as of Thursday, October 26. As the Israeli airstrikes on Gaza intensify, we recognize with horror and grief that this death toll is already inaccurate. 1/5
I feel like Ready Player One is masc Barbie movie
Stop Cop City
Mattress stores are the only place that treat a set of conjoined twins like a King
As long as you’re in student debt, you should get a student discount
What’s the worst example of cultural appropriation you’ve ever seen? I met a white woman named Ebony AND SHE WAS A COP
I was frustrated with the difficulty of getting a text back from my adhd friends but adding a picture of my kitten is 100% effective
Why don’t ppl only get black and white tattoos and use themselves as a coloring book
Well we did it. We raised alopecia awareness. I’d like to thank everyone involved in the slap for creating the most successful campaign since the ice bucket challenge!
ACTION ALERT: Protect your first amendment rights! SB 171, which would criminalize the right to protest, will be heard TOMORROW in the Senate Judiciary Committee at 4 PM. We need you to take action against this harmful, regressive piece of legislation. schr.org/action-alert-t…
Forget robots gaining self-awareness, I’m afraid of me gaining self-awareness
In these anxious times, it’s so important to take a deep breath in but def spit out that poison ASAP
There’s no excuse not to dress your baby in a cute lil costume all year round. It’s not like they have to look professional
shaunak godkhindi @ShaunakIsCool
2K Followers 925 Following Standup comedian | I’ll Take It a comedy WebSeries linked below!
samm severin @waitressboner
2K Followers 2K Following poets are always lying about being comedians but I’m not
e rolling on molly @Evanszanycomedy
992 Followers 545 Following stream my podcast “And That’s The Podcast” now! 5 stars with over 14 ratings
blaire erskine @blaireerskine
410K Followers 2K Following Writer for @jimmykimmellive. “The woman playing Yaccarino”- @THR. Rep: CAA
Laura Peek @laurapeek_
10K Followers 941 Following standup, sweetheart, likes the outdoors💧🌿🍉🦀 • from Nashville, in LA • IG - @ laurapeekcomedy • mgmt - [email protected] & [email protected]
John-Michael Bond @BondJohnBond
4K Followers 2K Following Groucho Marx then Richard Marx then Karl Marx. Photos. Standup. Listen to my jokes: https://t.co/sveF3au4nf
kyle rehl @kylerehl
2K Followers 1K Following
Kevin @SoSure
1K Followers 3K Following
Chris Nikitas 🦕 @CjNikitas
332 Followers 308 Following Bus driver 🚌 Ambulance man 🚑 Ticket inspector 🎟️
WELCOME TO HELL @wtfdeannatroi
566 Followers 513 Following Views expressed are my own and are questionable at best.
Nathan Owens @nateowenscomedy
1K Followers 1K Following comedian, writer, ATL fan & resident. #FILA, 25% of @forthandten podcast. West Virginia born Georgia raised. https://t.co/ZUEENZ1wLX
Petty Hardaway @PlugChapman
742 Followers 552 Following Jokeslinger, 2016 #ABFFComedywings Finalist,Comedy Central's Hart of the City, proud dad, black swimmer,free thinker, 88'table hockey champion, Kareem Leonidas
MILKY WAY GHETTO 🌌 @JayJurden
30K Followers 2K Following he/him. comic / actor / writer / X-Men nerd/writer! - bisexual demon / booking - https://t.co/ikhegHrDPH
Dulcé Sloan @dulcesloan
41K Followers 907 Following Comic | Actor | Correspondent on @TheDailyShow | Honeybee on @GreatNorthFox | Producer of @dontreachinbag
Hillary ❤️ @tshila40926981
24 Followers 2K Following trans girl 🏳️⚧️ i’m not active here, follow @hillary_ts
Hamisu Abubakar @HamisuAbub81541
232 Followers 677 Following
Hillary ❤️ @hillayts204433
22 Followers 2K Following trans girl 🏳️⚧️ not active here, follow @hillary_ts
Barbi 🍧 @adeats52441928
30 Followers 2K Following Post-Op Trans girl 🏳️⚧️ princess with a twist follow my main @pradabarbix
Hillary ❤️ @hilats4874267
23 Followers 2K Following Trans girl 🏳️⚧️ princess with a twist follow my main account @hillary_ts
Missy 🎀 @DannyBO00656044
50 Followers 3K Following trans girl 🏳️⚧️ private account 🤗 follow my main @transmissy
Missou 💋 @RABINDR61602036
118 Followers 3K Following backup account 🏳️⚧️ follow my main @transmissy
Brian Cochran @BrianCochr66237
129 Followers 3K Following
Elyse Fuentes @FuentesEly27764
112 Followers 3K Following
Janae Fisher @fisher_jan10888
99 Followers 3K Following
James Oden is Seeking.. @Official_Oden
848 Followers 5K Following Seeking Representation - PSIFF Best Fantasy Script Award Winner, The Script Lab Quarterfinalist. Writer of Sci-Fi, Fantasy⚔️, Horror☠️
sea hag @SeaDoesTweet
45 Followers 191 Following
Cori Isla @xtragravybscuit
36 Followers 133 Following ɪ ʟᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ғᴇᴇʟ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ TᕼE s♥h♥i♥t♥ b͙u͙t͙ b͙o͙y͙ y͙o͙u͙ c͙a͙n͙t͙ o͙u͙t͙ ⒻⒶⓇⓉ ᗰE 💅
Modelface Comedy @ModelfaceC
366 Followers 710 Following Melissa Hahn, booking and producing comedy shows in Asheville North Carolina
Ghost Host @ghosthostdl
124 Followers 128 Following Greetings and Salutations! I host Ultimate Werewolf: Live on Twitch! Check out Twitch to see the ongoing adventures of a millennial haunted by a cool ghost
Andy Abramson @ImprovAtItsBest
629 Followers 5K Following Improv At Its Best! Improv Shows & Classes, Around The World.
Katie Hughes @katiebruise
1K Followers 696 Following World’s Stupidest Genius. ATL. // Team Coco House // 2019 StandUp NBC Finalist // 2019 Creative Loafing ATL Critics’ Pick Best Comedian
Chris Pattison @ChrisPcomedie
5 Followers 39 Following Charlotte NC based comedian just trying to become a radish. A boy can dream, right?
Brandon Ream @Reamkore
4K Followers 3K Following He/Him I Dumb Jokes with typos | Co-host of The Nostalgic Front Podcast.
Patrick McCormick @Patrick81095547
38 Followers 34 Following
Jodi @TraderJodi
527 Followers 773 Following Beastie Boys and Paramore enthusiast. Trader Joe’s stan. she/her.
The Empty Pockets @theemptypockets
2K Followers 4K Following “Make It Through” out now. midwest roots rock. wnba obsessed. baseball band. liberal AF. Erika: she/her
Stephen Jones @stephenjones766
161 Followers 448 Following 26 I am a comedian just trying to find out his way in the world and when in doubt always remember the mid still selling
Gabaguci Mane @mkultra615
143 Followers 135 Following I am human and I need to be loved IG @eastsidecomedy615
Cyd Chaia Schwartz @CydneySchwartz
194 Followers 732 Following Just another cynical Jewish girl in New York. A wannabe comedian, full time designer
Dr. Andrew Salyer @AndrewSalyer
616 Followers 2K Following Visiting Lecturer @GeorgiaTech. Part-time Art Dept Faculty @Spelman. Artist. Curator. Writer. Art Collab @Salyer_Schaag. PhD & MFA @UWMadison. BFA @HerronSchool
𝔡𝔢𝔤𝔢𝔫�.. @angelbaby_emoji
249 Followers 171 Following idle vapourings of a mind diseased :3 (she/her)
Tequila Trash House @TequilaTrashPod
3 Followers 60 Following sometimes dad jokes, always bad jokes. email: [email protected] https://t.co/Zk2RN2GUeO https://t.co/vvG5Gv58ZO
Rebekkah Epperson @bekepperson
47 Followers 488 Following
shaunak godkhindi @ShaunakIsCool
2K Followers 925 Following Standup comedian | I’ll Take It a comedy WebSeries linked below!
samm severin @waitressboner
2K Followers 2K Following poets are always lying about being comedians but I’m not
e rolling on molly @Evanszanycomedy
992 Followers 545 Following stream my podcast “And That’s The Podcast” now! 5 stars with over 14 ratings
blaire erskine @blaireerskine
410K Followers 2K Following Writer for @jimmykimmellive. “The woman playing Yaccarino”- @THR. Rep: CAA
Laura Peek @laurapeek_
10K Followers 941 Following standup, sweetheart, likes the outdoors💧🌿🍉🦀 • from Nashville, in LA • IG - @ laurapeekcomedy • mgmt - [email protected] & [email protected]
Roy Wood Jr- Ex Jedi @roywoodjr
437K Followers 6K Following I tell the truth like white draws. FORMER: @TheDailyShow CURRENT: Social Recluse. FAMU grad reppin 205. Took me 5 yrs to get a 4yr degree, don't take me serious
John-Michael Bond @BondJohnBond
4K Followers 2K Following Groucho Marx then Richard Marx then Karl Marx. Photos. Standup. Listen to my jokes: https://t.co/sveF3au4nf
Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman
200K Followers 4K Following Year round iced coffee drinker. Stand-up special "People Pleaser" out now. Previously: Last Week Tonight, Mrs. Maisel, Head Writer/EP Desus & Mero.
kyle rehl @kylerehl
2K Followers 1K Following
Kevin @SoSure
1K Followers 3K Following
Chris Nikitas 🦕 @CjNikitas
332 Followers 308 Following Bus driver 🚌 Ambulance man 🚑 Ticket inspector 🎟️
Laurie Kilmartin @anylaurie16
106K Followers 6K Following Comedian / Emmy-Nominated & WGA Award-Winning Writer / Seen on After Midnight, Conan, Corden / NYT Best Selling Author / "Cis Woke Grief Sl*t" out now.
WELCOME TO HELL @wtfdeannatroi
566 Followers 513 Following Views expressed are my own and are questionable at best.
Nathan Owens @nateowenscomedy
1K Followers 1K Following comedian, writer, ATL fan & resident. #FILA, 25% of @forthandten podcast. West Virginia born Georgia raised. https://t.co/ZUEENZ1wLX
Jeff Lawson @jeffiel
46K Followers 155 Following Owner of The Onion. Entrepreneur, ex-CEO and cofounder of Twilio. NYT Worst Selling author.
Good Cop / Rad Cop @cop_rad
619 Followers 221 Following GC/RC AB. Chattanooga’s Bastards of Pop Country. We are 100% sure that Hank done it this way.
plague rat 🐀 @x3r0gxx
8K Followers 7K Following federation of plague rats against forced mass infection 🐀 🐀 🐀 🏴
ATL Antifascists (kol.. @afainatl
25K Followers 828 Following Fuck Musk, follow us everywhere else especially Mastodon: Linktree: https://t.co/Q7RBRzQrbt Mastodon: https://t.co/V8H4SeQhsF All main posts originate on Mastodon.
Franchesca Ramsey @chescaleigh
247K Followers 3K Following tv writer, producer, actress | podcast: #LemmeFixIt - as of 11/29/23 tweets by FR assistant Chloe
Atlanta Community Pre.. @atlanta_press
18K Followers 499 Following We're a collective of writers and researchers in Atlanta.
Melissa Blake @mblakewriter
2K Followers 191 Following Co-EP Based On A True Story Writer EP The Wilds Writer Co-EP October Faction Writer Co-EP One Mississippi Writer Supervising Producer Sleepy Hollow
Tom Smuts @TomSmuts
1K Followers 898 Following Mad Men, Bosch, The Good Wife, etc. Husband of WGA President @MeredithStiehm. Speaking solely for myself.
Brian Egeston @TheBrianwrites
779 Followers 296 Following Amateur failure. Professional TV/Film Writer. THE GAME, ON A WING AND A PRAYER, PERFECT HARMONY, THE QUAD, SAINTS AND SINNERS. Oh and I'm a whistle blower.
Hannah Riley @hannahcrileyy
32K Followers 1K Following occasional writer/organizer/abolitionist. trying to make journalism a little better. stop cop city!
Brandon K. Hines @thumpio
2K Followers 397 Following TV Writer (Harlem, Fellow Travelers). Reps: Rain & Gersh. #BlackLivesAlwaysMatter 🏳️🌈 he/him
derek guy @dieworkwear
799K Followers 964 Following Menswear writer. Editor at @putthison. Creator of @RLGoesHard. Bylines at The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Financial Times, Esquire, and Mr. Porter
Right Wing Cope @RightWingCope
417K Followers 139 Following DM Submissions, documenting cope in all forms | "happily lapping up vintage sour grievances" - Slate | Manager: @IAteTheMango
Adrienne | Creative C.. @brownandbella
24K Followers 2K Following Creative Consultant. Resident Know-It-All. Equal Parts OG and Pinterest Mom. If Snoop and Martha Stewart had a love child, she'd be me.
depths of wikipedia! @depthsofwiki
880K Followers 4K Following Hello I am @anniierau Please take away my blue check! I did not ask for it!
Callum Stephen (He/Hi.. @AutisticCallum_
70K Followers 553 Following Autistic ADHD’er 🧠 | LGBTQ+ 🏳️🌈 | Writer ✍️ | Dreamer ✨ | IG and TikTok: @ autistic_callum_
carina adly mackenzie @cadlymack
109K Followers 636 Following writer/producer/disaster. we were liars, roswell new mexico, the originals. she/her
Katie Hughes @katiebruise
1K Followers 696 Following World’s Stupidest Genius. ATL. // Team Coco House // 2019 StandUp NBC Finalist // 2019 Creative Loafing ATL Critics’ Pick Best Comedian
ParisSashay @ParisSashay
2K Followers 144 Following My Comedy Album ‘My Honest Ignorance’ is available on all platforms! 'Thats WILD' on YouTube! #Supportthecampaign
Gender Pay Gap Bot @PayGapApp
231K Followers 27 Following If you tweet about #IWD2023, I'll retweet your gender pay gap 👀 Tweet '@paygapapp pay gap for (company name)' to get a reply with an employer's pay gap stats.
Claire Penis @ZeroSuitCamus
102K Followers 6K Following I’m the only one who thinks The Pyramids are normal
Gigi ⚡️Tech & Mon.. @1stgenmoneymuse
10K Followers 668 Following Teacher👩🏾🏫 → Team #JobsATM (Apply to Me) → Dev Advocate👩🏾💻helping you pivot into remote tech roles & live financially free #BlackTechTwitter
William Hudson Foskey @wtfoskey
400 Followers 202 Following These are things I write when I’m high. Instagram: @wtfoskey
Vanessa Gonzalez @vanessagcomedy
3K Followers 847 Following 📺 @TruTV @HBOmax @ComedyCentral @latewithlilly 🧜🏽♀️ Listen to my album and/or buy a pin! 🔗 https://t.co/lu5nEgBoSH
😈🌼 @devildaisies
2K Followers 274 Following I'm Ali ('97 she/they) ❤️🔥 AZ based illustrator / designer / student / dungeon master / pig rescue volunteer / busybody
Sofia ''Buff Girlfrie.. @sofiabuffgf
149K Followers 922 Following Bush league slut. Shit post hobbyist. NSFW account @SofiaRosa69
Jenny Zigrino @jennyzigrino
8K Followers 847 Following stand up comic all around badass. insta @jennyzigrino
𝔡𝔢𝔤𝔢𝔫�.. @angelbaby_emoji
249 Followers 171 Following idle vapourings of a mind diseased :3 (she/her)
Brian JK Regan @brianjkregan
191 Followers 70 Following President. Friend to all. Frenemy to even more.
F This Platform @MehranX
3K Followers 579 Following not really interested in a medium run by an ugly bigot.
Amanda Kruel 💨🐿.. @skweeds
12K Followers 3K Following Puns, politics, & pedantry. Captions, “crazy” ideas, & crosswords. Formidable farts. Life doesn’t give us a break from tragedy, so why take a break from comedy?
Pooja's Behavioural I.. @HiShelli
3K Followers 131 Following Culture Editor & Writer | @voguemagazine @archdigest @thrillist | Detroiter in Chicago | ⚢
Rekha Shankar @rekhalshankar
51K Followers 2K Following #GrandCrew on @nbc / #Digman on @comedycentral / @collegehumor / @ucbtla / #JFL / she
Natalie Palamides @natdogkatdog
11K Followers 465 Following my comedy special, Nate: A One Man Show, is on Netflix
Krystina Arielle @KrystinaArielle
83K Followers 7K Following |Host Star Wars : The High Republic Show| Bob @dimension20show | Bearah Pawcett & Prophetess on @criticalrole| Judy #HeadlessSeries|
cal? @cal_gif
88K Followers 609 Following prisoner of war in the battle between Toyotathon and Happy Honda Days 🦕 NO PPV onlyfans // https://t.co/aKpLWFiLKt // also @arabellnightly
"Doctor Who" star Ncuti Gatwa says “there’s so much white mediocrity that gets celebrated, and Black people have to be absolutely flawless to get half of [that] anyway." “We’re trained to be like, ‘If I’m not exceptional, I won’t be loved.’ I think I’m just learning now like,…
@sauermom_ At 21 I dated a man who was 31 and it was the worst experience of my life. 0/10 I would not recommend it to any young lady. THERES ALWAYS A REASON WHY THEY ARE SINGLE.
@NegativeGain @ghoul_alert trans ppl aren’t a third gender but congrats on doing biphobia and transphobia at the same time
Uhm what’s with younger queers hating when straight people use “partner” for the SO??? We literally asked them to do that. We spent YEARS asking them to do that so it would be normalized and we weren’t immediatley outed in unsafe situations. KEEP SAYING PARTNERS
Now me personally? I wouldn’t have written this
OK gentle French fries- i need to rehearse: TMB “I am RIGHT NOW available to listen to 45 minutes of comedy material in exchange for a t-shirt!” If that description fits you! Thank you. I know should be doing this on another platform.
TODAY! 7 pm Eastern!
🚨 FREE, ACCESSIBLE WORLDWIDE, VIRTUAL EVENT! 🚨 Stay in your jim jams from anywheee in the world for a talk for @QPLNYC about my memoir, "Sure, I’ll Join Your Cult," with Mia Jackson & David Shoemaker. 🚨Watch it on Facebook & YouTube! 🚨Watch HERE -> bit.ly/3x4Kuw3
OK behooved and beloved fellows in the fish net- i need to rehearse: TMB “I am RIGHT NOW available to listen to 45 minutes of comedy material in exchange for a t-shirt!” If that description fits you! Thank you. I know should be doing this on another platform, but haven’t gotten…
@sebjenseb high iq correlating with lack of health conditions (e.g. constant wellness, no dizzy spells) when paired with the military context makes me think that the presence of brain injury might've been another deciding factor
@sebjenseb The police one is the most likely to not replicate outside of the military, and maybe the constipation since they’re all eating the same diarrhea inducing food
(Note: this is a military sample I suspect that the one for being attracted to the opposite sex will not replicate).
@WeNotSocks HAAHAHAH I said Dominican republic first and ran with it cause the word problem went too fast to switch to Denmark 🤣🤣
In 1997, Julia Hill climbed a 200-foot 1000-year-old Californian redwood tree and did not come down for 738 days to prevent Pacific Lumber Company loggers from cutting it down. She ultimately reached an agreement with the company to spare the tree and a 200-foot buffer zone…
here are two men with different builds, yet both look great in high-rise trousers
@dieworkwear I dont think everyone can pull off the high-rise trousers
Just a reminder of what Brad Pitt's kids think of him.
JK Rowling has used her personal and financial ties to support famous men accused of abuse and/or rape for years. For the reasons below, @jk_rowling is not a good advocate for feminism, women™, or domestic violence victims. All public information is sourced and dated. Long 🧵:
@holy_schnitt My favorite part about this description is that she blatantly thinks this girl has no inner life or thoughts at all. Just likes pottery and fruit nothing else
Hi! I am hosting the Writers Guild Awards in New York City in two weeks, and I don't have a fancy publicist so I am boldly taking to this app to ask: Are there any brands that want to give or loan me a cool suit to wear during the ceremony?
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