Cristela Alonzo @cristela9
Podcast: https://t.co/roKdARojsk Stand-up 🎤: #MiddleClassy #LowerClassy @netflix Book: #MusictoMyYears Sitcom: #Cristela #DallasCowboys #ClipperNation cristelaalonzo.com Los Angeles, CA Joined July 2018-
Tweets31K
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Followers47K
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Following1K
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Likes10K
Yes, of course I’m watching Clippers and I’m eating sunflower seeds. Walgreens brand. No joke. They’re soooo good. My go-to.
Weird. Between mass shootings at schools and hospitals refusing to treat fatal pregnancy issues, I’d think that way more people would be excited to have kids
Weird. Between mass shootings at schools and hospitals refusing to treat fatal pregnancy issues, I’d think that way more people would be excited to have kids
That’s right 🚨 @cristela9 has 5 shows coming up at Punch Line & tickets are ON SALE NOW! Secure your spot to see Cristela in person from Aug. 8-10 at livemu.sc/3JAeAub 🔥😆 If you haven’t already, watch her Netflix special called “Middle Class” 🎥
BREAKING: Supreme Court that blocked vaccine mandates & struck down quarantine orders suddenly VERY concerned about immunity.
👏STOP👏CALLING👏'EM👏WEEPING👏WILLOWS!👏THEY'RE👏TRYING👏TO👏TURN👏THINGS👏AROUND!👏YOU👏AREN'T👏HELPING👏AND👏WHATNOT!👏
I love this so much. So good.
It’s the evening and I just out a neon rope light under my desk and now I think I need to get one for my monitor because I’m planning on writing…but I want it to feel like I’m gaming. Also I’m drinking ginger tea. I’m so fucking cool.
Kyrie can be fun to watch until I remember his vax/flat earth stuff.
HOLY SHIT NORM! We haven’t had a Sixth Man like this since Jamal. And I loved Jamal.
Look. I’m putting a shelf together, drinking a michelada and watching the @LAClippers and can’t nobody tell me anything.
Low scoring game two on deck. Looks like Lawler’s Law might not happen to either.
I hate the Wingstop “no flex” commercial so much and I don’t know why because I love Wingstop.
KAWHIIIIIIIIII! OMG OMG OMG.....YES..... I decided last minute to not go tonight to the game because I'm tired from traveling. It'll be fun to watch though.
It’s easy to criticize Tesla, but at least owning one leaves your family with extra money for the funeral
Just saw an ad for an app called #LGBTQ+ride - ride sharing app for the community/allies. I wanted to post about it in case anyone knows anything about it because the ad says drivers keep 75% of their fare and that makes me interested in trying it. Drivers deserve more of the $
Shocker and whatnot.
Shocker and whatnot.
Laurie Kilmartin @anylaurie16
106K Followers 6K Following Comedian / Emmy-Nominated & WGA Award-Winning Writer / Seen on After Midnight, Conan, Corden / NYT Best Selling Author / "Cis Woke Grief Sl*t" out now.
Lalo Alcaraz @laloalcaraz
52K Followers 13K Following Editorial Cartoonist, Herb Block Prize '22, Chicano Artist. TV Writer & Producer, 2x Pulitzer finalist. #LaCucaracha, IG:laloalcaraz1, FB lacucaracha & Threads
Laura Martínez 🥑 @miblogestublog
39K Followers 2K Following Professional Mexican and taco enthusiast. Opinions are mine, and not those of the @nytimes because I don't work there.
Jesse Thorn 🤷�.. @JesseThorn
65K Followers 982 Following @Bullseye @JordanJesseGo #JJHo @MaxFunHQ @PutThisOn. Satin for them draws, velvet for the mic and a pound for the cause. Tips go to @AlOtroLado_org.
Eliza Skinner @elizaskinner
73K Followers 1K Following Stand-up comic and Emmy winning comedy writer… Co-EP/Headwriter/Roaster Toaster for #EarthToNed (Disney+)... she/her/mistress… comedy album linked below👇
Marcella Arguello @marcellacomedy
45K Followers 2K Following Comedian. Known Bitch. HBO special #BitchGrowUp on MAX. Comedy albums: Mercury in Reggaeton & TheWokeBully. Podcast: Comedy Is Dead! ░T░I░X░ ░I░N░ ░B░I░0░
Yesika Salgado 🥭�.. @YesikaStarr
30K Followers 619 Following Poet | Columnist | LA born Salvadoran 🇸🇻🥭✨ please refer all inquiries to [email protected]
♥ Gloria Calderón .. @everythingloria
62K Followers 2K Following Showrunner/Director/Writer/Actor @onedayatatime @withloveonprime #TheHorrorOfDoloresRoach Mom, Wife @davekellett Proud @womenshistory Ambassador🇨🇺 🇺🇸
Jimmy Pardo @jimmypardo
29K Followers 731 Following Standing up comedian & host of the award-winning podcast @NeverNotFunny. Appeared on Conan, Tonight Show, Late Late Show & more. I quit Bryan Adams' band.
Jackie Kashian @jackiekashian
45K Followers 2K Following 🎤Touring Stand-Up Comedian 📺See me on After Midnight, HBO, NPR, Conan, Corden, & more! 🎤Podcasts — Dork Forest🌳 Jackie & Laurie Show🎧
Juan Escalante @JuanSaaa
33K Followers 12K Following Former undocumented immigrant. Politics/National Parks. 🇻🇪•🇺🇸 — opinions are my own https://t.co/YUvtqfFZzg☁️
Amy Miller @amymiller
27K Followers 3K Following 💜✌️ female comedian / coastal elite white trash / not talking to you, talking to your dog / never not touching my head
Jenny Lorenzo 🇨�.. @JENNIZZLES
21K Followers 3K Following Actor/Writer/Comedian • Creator of Abuela's Family • Voice actor on Jellystone, Sharkdog and Hamster & Gretel • SAG/TAG • She/her • @selectmgmtgroup @sbvtalent
Julissa Natzely Arce .. @julissaarce
22K Followers 2K Following Best-selling author, My (Underground) American Dream & Someone Like Me. You Sound Like A White Girl Mar 2022 Board @nilc_org @ascendfundny Bylines @TIME & more
Voto Latino @votolatino
115K Followers 3K Following We’re a grassroots political organization focused on educating and empowering a new generation of Latino voters. We work to hold our leaders accountable.
Thicklena @mala_munoz
6K Followers 1K Following Gotham/Variety Audio Award Winner ‘22 #MarijuaneraPodcast @locatora_radio @iheartradio @myculturapod 🎙🌹As seen in @allure_magazine @forbes @latimes @variety
Maria Hinojosa 🥑 @Maria_Hinojosa
108K Followers 8K Following Pres/Founder @futuromedia, author of #OnceIWasYou, anchor & EP @latinousa, host @inthethickshow, distinguished journalist in res @barnardcollege
Erika Andiola @ErikaAndiola
52K Followers 4K Following Immigrant Rights & Progressive Advocate | Comms Director for @TheYoungCenter | Former Press Sec for Bernie 2016 | ❤️ @Kai_Newkirk 🐾 Luna | Opinions are my own
Prisca Dorcas Mojíca.. @priscadorcas
10K Followers 2K Following Nicaragüense | Masters of Divinity | Founder of @latinarebels | femme as in smart af | book 2 is available for preorder @sealpress 📧:[email protected]
Emiterio Velázquez @veemiterio
48 Followers 474 Following
Mary J @maryloubird
42 Followers 1K Following
Nora @Nora92249460250
0 Followers 2 Following
Wendy Fiorini @FioriniWen97172
0 Followers 4 Following
Ray j. Gazil @gazil_ray
565 Followers 773 Following
Bolita y Charada Soci.. @Bolitaycharada
2 Followers 385 Following Un grupo de aficionados de web3 con la misión de empoderar a millones de seres humanos, utilizando este adorado juego de nuestro patrimonio nacional.
mg @mg0258949978742
18 Followers 302 Following
Musa McSweeney @McsweeneyM42286
62 Followers 1K Following
S @samari0004
0 Followers 450 Following
Rafael Lopez @RafaelLope42089
0 Followers 12 Following
Chuy @Chuy182075
7 Followers 43 Following
Harlan J Vermilya @HJVerm
1K Followers 3K Following Liberal Democrat, attended MSU '62/65 & FSU '66....Drafted '66 completed Artillery OCS '67...was an adventure....married since '65.
Dudu.E.P @Ep1982D
0 Followers 172 Following
Young Sir @RobertT00515811
49 Followers 3K Following
True67 @true676
696 Followers 1K Following Health & Fitness Industry. Martial Arts, Boxing. Enjoy the Outdoors, Camping, Music, Photography. Curious, Quirky....Just Me 😁
Leo of the day @Leooftheda31610
151 Followers 382 Following
Carol Rogers @CarolKnosBest
186 Followers 939 Following enjoys Twitter in spite of my demographic profile.
Abigail Hills @AbigailHills
224 Followers 1K Following Published writer and editor, copywriter and content strategist, bachelor's in creative writing and English. Book lover, mental health advocate, she/her 🖋️📚
HunnyHiive @HunnyHiive
287 Followers 1K Following Tasks of Parenting is WILD FYI you're not alone on the journey.
Aaron Reese @duce499
140 Followers 180 Following
Kristin Reid 🌊 @KristinMReid11
3K Followers 4K Following Democrat. Realist. Dedicated to the preservation of Democracy. Views are my own. #BidenHarris2024 #TeamMalcolmKenyatta #BetoRoadWarriors #BidenFlightCrew
ZzZ @SchemfS
14 Followers 29 Following
Sandra Torres @SandraT23517808
38 Followers 298 Following
宇宙大爆炸 @wangrui230203
26 Followers 209 Following
Hi I'm Spencer @Clipper_Spencer
890 Followers 2K Following I'm Spencer a Artist,♒, ⛳Golfer #ClipperNation Est. 94' 💙🤍❤, #RaiderNation 92' ☠🏴, Dodgers Est. 96', Poet, #CinanbonNation, UnApoLoGeTiCaLLy BLACK✊🏿🇺🇸🇬🇾
Normant Ince @NormantI7364
5 Followers 212 Following
Denise @iamdeniise
349 Followers 308 Following an eternal love bullshit you know you’ll never mean ♡
Suraj @Suraj141909
0 Followers 19 Following
Yirga Wendmu @wendmuyirga
532 Followers 7K Following Am a man who gives more honour & respectoin for my Mother & wife in the world...
Lets make world a bet.. @bossafzal5
1K Followers 5K Following ITpian & Freelancer from Maharashtra. Big Fan of Rajnikanth. Movies,Travelling,surfing. RTs r 4 more views & opinions. Believe in Humanity. Live & Let Live
Tony Dashiell @StickSpecialist
1K Followers 4K Following Jazz Performance Major at the University of Wisconsin. Session work with multiple acts in the Duluth and Minneapolis areas.
🌹🏴☠️⚜�.. @999_y99917521
449 Followers 3K Following
The Oz-alorian @the_gr8_oz
146 Followers 2K Following
Natasha Olive @natashaolive615
2 Followers 36 Following
OUNAR KOUYATE @ounar37038
61 Followers 100 Following
Inga Trapp @IngaTrapp
296 Followers 576 Following Become addicted to constant and never-ending self-improvement.
VIAJES Y VACACIONES C.. @turismocaceres
726 Followers 4K Following ¡Saludos y Feliz Día! https://t.co/r1u54wRCys https://t.co/ch9gw3Uo6A https://t.co/6vvHKzR2vr https://t.co/P6oM3OYryA
Melissa Brondo @Brondo81
3 Followers 125 Following
maryaweel @maryaweel995321
137 Followers 6K Following
Hanz Elijah @hanz_elijah
3 Followers 83 Following
Mon amie la rose @NoBetterMeow
296 Followers 2K Following
Chucky_1 @Chucky_210
1 Followers 7 Following
hhtgvuyfgg @hhtgvuyfgg41034
6 Followers 22 Following
Laurie Kilmartin @anylaurie16
106K Followers 6K Following Comedian / Emmy-Nominated & WGA Award-Winning Writer / Seen on After Midnight, Conan, Corden / NYT Best Selling Author / "Cis Woke Grief Sl*t" out now.
Lalo Alcaraz @laloalcaraz
52K Followers 13K Following Editorial Cartoonist, Herb Block Prize '22, Chicano Artist. TV Writer & Producer, 2x Pulitzer finalist. #LaCucaracha, IG:laloalcaraz1, FB lacucaracha & Threads
Laura Martínez 🥑 @miblogestublog
39K Followers 2K Following Professional Mexican and taco enthusiast. Opinions are mine, and not those of the @nytimes because I don't work there.
Jesse Thorn 🤷�.. @JesseThorn
65K Followers 982 Following @Bullseye @JordanJesseGo #JJHo @MaxFunHQ @PutThisOn. Satin for them draws, velvet for the mic and a pound for the cause. Tips go to @AlOtroLado_org.
Eliza Skinner @elizaskinner
73K Followers 1K Following Stand-up comic and Emmy winning comedy writer… Co-EP/Headwriter/Roaster Toaster for #EarthToNed (Disney+)... she/her/mistress… comedy album linked below👇
Marcella Arguello @marcellacomedy
45K Followers 2K Following Comedian. Known Bitch. HBO special #BitchGrowUp on MAX. Comedy albums: Mercury in Reggaeton & TheWokeBully. Podcast: Comedy Is Dead! ░T░I░X░ ░I░N░ ░B░I░0░
Yesika Salgado 🥭�.. @YesikaStarr
30K Followers 619 Following Poet | Columnist | LA born Salvadoran 🇸🇻🥭✨ please refer all inquiries to [email protected]
♥ Gloria Calderón .. @everythingloria
62K Followers 2K Following Showrunner/Director/Writer/Actor @onedayatatime @withloveonprime #TheHorrorOfDoloresRoach Mom, Wife @davekellett Proud @womenshistory Ambassador🇨🇺 🇺🇸
Jimmy Pardo @jimmypardo
29K Followers 731 Following Standing up comedian & host of the award-winning podcast @NeverNotFunny. Appeared on Conan, Tonight Show, Late Late Show & more. I quit Bryan Adams' band.
Jackie Kashian @jackiekashian
45K Followers 2K Following 🎤Touring Stand-Up Comedian 📺See me on After Midnight, HBO, NPR, Conan, Corden, & more! 🎤Podcasts — Dork Forest🌳 Jackie & Laurie Show🎧
Juan Escalante @JuanSaaa
33K Followers 12K Following Former undocumented immigrant. Politics/National Parks. 🇻🇪•🇺🇸 — opinions are my own https://t.co/YUvtqfFZzg☁️
Amy Miller @amymiller
27K Followers 3K Following 💜✌️ female comedian / coastal elite white trash / not talking to you, talking to your dog / never not touching my head
Julissa Natzely Arce .. @julissaarce
22K Followers 2K Following Best-selling author, My (Underground) American Dream & Someone Like Me. You Sound Like A White Girl Mar 2022 Board @nilc_org @ascendfundny Bylines @TIME & more
Voto Latino @votolatino
115K Followers 3K Following We’re a grassroots political organization focused on educating and empowering a new generation of Latino voters. We work to hold our leaders accountable.
Maria Hinojosa 🥑 @Maria_Hinojosa
108K Followers 8K Following Pres/Founder @futuromedia, author of #OnceIWasYou, anchor & EP @latinousa, host @inthethickshow, distinguished journalist in res @barnardcollege
Erika Andiola @ErikaAndiola
52K Followers 4K Following Immigrant Rights & Progressive Advocate | Comms Director for @TheYoungCenter | Former Press Sec for Bernie 2016 | ❤️ @Kai_Newkirk 🐾 Luna | Opinions are my own
Never Not Funny @NeverNotFunny
28K Followers 214 Following A weekly podcast hosted by comedian @jimmypardo and producer @mattbelknap. Tweets by @MyNameIsGaron unless noted -JP or -MB!
Julio Ricardo Varela @julito77
41K Followers 8K Following @MSNBC columnist. Founder, Latino Rebels. Futuro Media alum. @suffolkmsoccer fan. Opinions mine and mine alone 🇵🇷
Garon Cockrell @MyNameIsGaron
7K Followers 4K Following #LGBTQIA Horror & Pop Culture Nerd/Screenwriter/Author/Streamer. Cast Member on @NeverNotFunny. Producer @PodHowToSurvive. @PopCultureBeast. TipJar Open! He/Him
Diego Bernal @DiegoBernalTX
30K Followers 6K Following Texas State Representative for HD 123. Daddy to Xan. Lawyer. Artist. Advocate. IG/FB: @DiegoBernalTX
Elmo @elmo
605K Followers 14 Following Elmo's Elmo! Elmo lives on Sesame Street and was told to tell you that Elmo is official! (account run with the help of Elmo’s mommy and daddy)
Mirjam Swanson @MirjamSwanson
8K Followers 4K Following Sports columnist. 🗞️ Southern California News Group. Trying to kick something that means something. Please, do tell. 🐙🍷😭🙏🏽🔑
Imani Gandy (Orca’s.. @AngryBlackLady
265K Followers 2K Following Three dogs. Two kitchens. Zero chill. | Lawyer. | Journalist. | co-host #BoomLawyered | “Queen of fucking Twitter or something.” | The Real Racist™ | 🏳️🌈
Negin Farsad @NeginFarsad
22K Followers 6K Following Comedian/TED Fellow, Regular on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me. Host of #FakeTheNation. Maker of @MuslimsRComing & @3rdStBlackout. Actor on Adult Swim's #BirdGirl.
Mychal @mychal3ts
150K Followers 3K Following “Having fun isn’t hard when you’ve got a library card” 📚
Camila Fernandez @CamilaFReports
2K Followers 2K Following AP Award Winner. Bilingual Journalist. @FIU. @IUBloomington. Retweets are not endorsements. 🚫
Yashar Ali 🐘 @yashar
725K Followers 37K Following HuffPost/NY Mag [email protected] Direct Messages Open Text/Call/Signal/Confide/WhatsApp: 310-795-2497. AGENTS: UTA
Carol Lombardini @ItsMeCarolAMPTP
7K Followers 392 Following cat mom. recovering buffy addict. lead negotiator for the AMPTP. parody of a person. contact: [email protected]
Kristina Bas Hamilton @kbashamilton
3K Followers 4K Following I help progressive advocacy & labor orgs in CA win #CALeg policy & #CABudget funding | Lobbyist | Host of Blueprint for CA Advocates Pod | Author of Changemaker
CADomesticWorker @CADomesticWrker
3K Followers 1K Following Organizing to expand and enforce rights and dignity for housecleaners, nannies, and caregivers in CA. #MyHealthMyDignity
Paul Morrissey @PaulMorrissey
5K Followers 4K Following Writer & Comedian from Late Show with David Letterman & Late Late Show on CBS. ABC Sports Anchor/College 🏀 PG/New Album “Ice Cream vs Everything”
Matt Fulchiron @TheFullCharge
11K Followers 1K Following The Power of How Podcast https://t.co/viLyQmSB8Q
Rich Talarico @richtalarico
3K Followers 1K Following Writer/Producer — Key & Peele, MADtv, SNL, Second City, Improv Olympic, WGA and SAG-AFTRA.
SAG-AFTRA @sagaftra
223K Followers 71 Following SAG-AFTRA is the world’s largest labor union representing performers and broadcasters. Reposts or follows do not equal endorsements.
Jesse Beer @thejessebeer
140 Followers 211 Following Music Manager and sports enthusiast. Father of 3 amazing children
Doin it! with Danny Z.. @doinitpodcast
471 Followers 107 Following Doin It! with Danny Zuker and Jenny Johnson, the podcast that will change your life! With @dannyzuker and @jennyjohnsonhi5 ! New episodes every Tuesday.
Colin Allred @ColinAllredTX
107K Followers 3K Following Dad, 4th generation Texan, former NFL linebacker, and Congressman. Running to be the next U.S. Senator from Texas.
Brig Muñoz-Liebowitz @brigliebs
4K Followers 1K Following Big fat TV writer - Showrunner #GorditaChronicles on @hbomax, @OneDayAtATime, Love Life, @peopleofearthtbs, @nbcbrooklyn99 // Especialista de tontería
Phil Lord @philiplord
116K Followers 5K Following Project Hail Spider-Man Across the Last Lego Cloney With a Chance of Jump Strays Han Batman Cocaine Afterparty Movie on Earth-Verses the Machines
Martha Kelly @MarthaKelly3
27K Followers 2K Following Alvin & the Chipmunks fan account. #BlackLivesMatter Instagram: @mkellyatx
Alicia Taylor @AliciaTaylorNXT
19K Followers 803 Following #WWE Ring Announcer 🎙 Pro Drummer 🥁 Rock n Roll Outlaw ☠️ #WWENXT Tuesday nights on #USANetwork 📺
Josh Gates @joshuagates
383K Followers 1K Following Explorer. Host of #ExpeditionUnknown, #JoshGatesTonight, & #TalesFromTheExplorersClub on @Discovery. Adventure is out there. Go find it!
Sara Rodriguez @sara4WI
9K Followers 5K Following Wisconsin’s 46th Lt. Governor. Proud mom. Wife. Nurse. Epidemiologist. Small Business Owner. Alum @JohnsHopkinsSPH @JHUNursing @CDCgov Official @LGSaraRodriguez
kim newmoney @kimnewmoney
1K Followers 759 Following photographer, daughter of vietnamese refugees, charming but in a sad way.
Raphael CF @RaphaelC_F
633 Followers 888 Following Chief of Staff @RubenGallego | Alum: @SenatorMenendez, @DeptVetAffairs, @ColumbiaSIPA & @RutgersU
Parker Molloy @ParkerMolloy
235K Followers 3K Following I write the media/culture/politics/whatever newsletter @readTPA: https://t.co/b5eKnkYTbA Chicagoan / wife of @KaylaPekkala / not an activist / likes baseball
Svante Myrick @SvanteMyrick
25K Followers 17K Following President and CEO of People For the American Way. @PeopleFor | @RightWingWatch | @YEONetwork. Just another version of you.
Culinary Union @Culinary226
17K Followers 642 Following Culinary Union represents 60,000 hospitality workers & has been fighting & winning for Nevadans for 89 years.
Natalia Cordova @YOSOYCORDOVA
48K Followers 921 Following
Rosario Dawson @rosariodawson
760K Followers 2K Following
Nina Garcia @ninagarcia
3.0M Followers 2K Following Official Account - Nina Garcia, @ELLEMagazine Editor-in-Chief & Project Runway Judge - Twitter Oficial de Nina Garcia
Olivia Julianna 🗳 @0liviajulianna
367K Followers 6K Following 21- Professional agitator, amateur political activist/strategist. WWE Fanatic 🇲🇽🏳️🌈 All Opinions are my own 💅🏼
Angelica Salas @AngelicaCHIRLA
3K Followers 2K Following Proud immigrant, activist for social change and mother. ED of @CHIRLA
Teri Kanefield @Teri_Kanefield
197K Followers 415 Following Former appellate defender. UC Berkeley Law graduate. Book prizes include the Jane Addams Book Award.
Helen Hong @funnyhelenhong
13K Followers 2K Following My comedy special “Well Hong” is on Amazon Prime/AppleTV/YouTube. NPR Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me, Never Have I Ever, Silicon Valley, The Unicorn. Innovative Artist
Immigrant Alliance fo.. @IAJEofMS
577 Followers 253 Following Immigrant led org in MS focused on sustainable change through education, grassroots organizing, consciousness-raising & civic participation.
Television Academy @TelevisionAcad
318K Followers 3K Following Home of the #Emmys, Television Academy, Television Academy Foundation & #emmymagazine.
Marisa Lagos @mlagos
15K Followers 2K Following Political correspondent for @KQED -- radio, TV and digital. Co-host of Political Breakdown podcast. Cali native, SF denizen. email - [email protected]
Jason Ritter 🦋 @JasonRitter
208K Followers 4K Following My only existence is for your amusement, and that is why I'm here with you. (he/him)
Jenn Stowe @JennOStowe
2K Followers 641 Following Executive Director @domesticworkers | Senior Advisor @CareinActionUS | Black feminist | mom ♥️ | #HUBison
The Talk @TheTalkCBS
507K Followers 938 Following Official Twitter for #TheTalk. Watch new episodes weekdays 2pm ET / 1pm PT on @CBS and @ParamountPlus.
Jennifer White @JWhitePubRadio
14K Followers 1K Following Jenn w/ two ns. Host of 1A from WAMU and NPR. Host of the Making Oprah, Making Obama and Sixteen Shots podcasts. Herder of small dogs. https://t.co/hqZECS2Tdj
Death by Toys @danpolydoris
28K Followers 10K Following I make custom toys/collectibles/garbage for a living.
No.
Look who I found outside of the Supreme Court! @KatiePhang
That look like the claw from a lobster with high blood pressure.
You’re not black if you don’t eat this!
the "stand-up comedians over 35 who don't wanna keep posting clips" lobby is far more powerful than you could have ever imagined
Biden has signed the bill requiring TikTok to be sold or banned in the U.S.
Mammogram results were good! Nothing suspicious! ❤️ Black women: PLEASE schedule your mammogram and don’t be like me and put it off!
the way those Wakefield sisters with their aquamarine eyes had a hold on me in my teenage years
you wouldn’t last an hour in the asylum where they raised me
Just saw a Mary Tyler Moore Show episode whose guest cast was Mary Hartman, Hayden Fox, Agent Larrabee, and Fred Flintstone. This might be my most @TVMoJoe tweet ever.
…just got the writing gig of my dreams, going to cry, throw up, never give up
JJ Redick is a great example of how you gotta be a sicko to be a coach. Any normal person would look at a cushy No. 1 analyst gig with two very successful podcasts and say "sweet, I'm set." But this man can't help but think he can fix the Hornets.
The effort. And just for us folks still here on Twitter. Thank you.
i think beyonce might get her fashion inspiration from betty white: thread
Wait, the guy wrote Oleanna????? Wowee. Who woulda guessed?!
David Mamet slams Hollywood's 'garbage' DEI initiatives. 'It's fascist totalitarianism' latimes.com/entertainment-…
First half MVP: ALL OF THEM, EVERY LAST ONE!!!! Most focused half we’ve seen. That said. The next 24 min will be the longest of the season. This one is far from over.
I’d prefer better vote quality than consecutive record.
Sen Susan Collins just cast her 9000th *consecutive* roll call vote.
When my dad died, a lot of comedians came to the funeral to offer their support and ask how they could get on Conan.
Okay look, I merely implied that the audience was full of nerds who don't like to party. I myself am also such a nerd!!!
In his 2024 WGA Awards monologue, Josh Gondelman jokingly admitted he ‘likes to party’ the way people on Twitter have been speculating he does since 2020. trib.al/ldEFUux
THIS Saturday... April 20, I am once again taking over the Yoo Hoo Room at @FlappersComedy in Burbank! The great @WendyLiebman joins me! Get tix: flapperscomedy.com/shows/jimmy-pa… In the meantime, here's a pic of me hanging out w @MotleyCrue & Sir Paul in 1984.
I love this caption/picture combo because it makes it look like I won an award for this joke. (I did not win an award.)
"One thing that’s special about our union, is that we don’t only represent TV and film writers. Our membership also spans several other dying industries." – Host @joshgondelman kicks off with jokes at the 2024 #WritersGuildAwards
@cristela9 I saw him in '79 after 52nd Street came out. Standing on the piano singing Big Shot. It was a blast.
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