Reductress @Reductress
The one and only fake women's news magazine. Shop, learn and listen to everything Reductress: https://t.co/rZ2ivP7vKO reductress.com New York Joined January 2013-
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Woman Puts Laundry on Fourth Procrastination Dry Cycle: ow.ly/uA6V50RnvgR
Of Course Extrovert Wants Open-Casket Funeral: ow.ly/JLg750Rnvbt
Cute! This Couple’s Anniversary Post Lists All the Times They Should Have Broken Up: ow.ly/MHr150Rnv5h
The GENTLE PARENTING tee - available now at Shop Reductress: bit.ly/3TmaytT
Haha...Wow is BACK this May 20th at @UnionHallNY with Reductress editors and our favorite comics - get tickets now: bit.ly/4b8vZGe
Ready to try satire writing? You can take 20% off any of our self-guided, online courses this month only with code APRIL20 at checkout: education.reductress.com
Woman Knows She Could Just Fuck Up a Spelling Bee Right Now: ow.ly/e6EF50Rnv0U
How to Listen to Your Body Even Though It Has No Idea What It's Talking About: ow.ly/jLWF50RnuXb
Oh No! Woman Has Definitely Already Told This Story but She Doesn't Remember to Whom: ow.ly/PXUX50RmENp
I LIVED IT: My Gynecologist Made a Face: ow.ly/erKV50RmEEr
Cat Up for Adoption at Shelter Bonded to Other, Less Impressive Cat: ow.ly/s3Ki50RmEvo
Saying 'I Should Get a New Job' Maximum Effort Woman Putting Into Getting New Job: ow.ly/Eqsg50RmEo0
Fuck! Woman Who Looks Good in Outfit Standing Up Now Has to Sit in It: ow.ly/BlkH50RlEvz
Why I Don’t See Other Women as Competition Unless We’re Going Thrifting: ow.ly/lXUt50RlEmb
'We Support the Right to Freedom of Expression,' Says University Official Who’s Trying to Contact the National Guard: ow.ly/plM750RmwXe
Columbia University Qualifies That Students Only Allowed to Stage Protest if It’s Quiet and Ineffective: ow.ly/ulvC50Rmwkl
Woman Who Actually Finished a Book Finally Starting to See What All the Fuss Is About: ow.ly/RKOQ50RlEjT
REPORT: Just Because Fake Plant Doesn't Need Water Doesn't Mean It Wouldn't Like Some: ow.ly/k4sJ50RlEgW
Woman Refuses to Throw Out Old Makeup Just in Case She Needs Eye Infection One Day: ow.ly/zVov50RlEaR
How to Be an Active Participant in the Conversation Without Bringing Up Your Cats: ow.ly/Lyvp50RkbBo
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26K Followers 1K Following Comedian, co-host @straightiolab, former editor @gawker. Let's do this!joe castle baker @joecastlebaker
26K Followers 1K Following I’m gay and I love seeing gay guys cooking together on YouTube!Sudi Green @Sudi_Green
26K Followers 836 Following (she/her) Model, Activist, writes for SNL & ShrillHideo NoHo @milesofgray
23K Followers 2K Following Co-host of @dailyzeitgeist nuclear war lololol ハーフ BlackCaitlin Durante @caitlindurante
16K Followers 1K Following comedian. writer. story analyst. co-host of @BechdelCast Black Trans Lives Matter she/theyMarcia Belsky @MarciaBelsky
24K Followers 2K Following I wrote 100 Tampons and more 🚀new album out now:REID POPE DUMB IDIOT @rpopetweets
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18K Followers 2K Following too tired to pee, too full of piss to sleep. staff writer @lifehacker. headline contributor @TheOnion @reductress.Max Silvestri @maxsilvestri
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42K Followers 1K Following Co-founder https://t.co/faCXwpaFue. Co-host Daily ZeitgeistAnnabel Meschke @annabel_meschke
16K Followers 2K Following i’ve never been serious in my life! || comedian/ twin ~ Instagram: @ armsandlegs (ˀ̢⋅⃘‧̮⋅⃘ˁ̡ી˂ᵒ͜͡ᵏᵎ⁾meg✨✨ @mjhorgss
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1 Followers 25 FollowingMG @minnagamal13
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0 Followers 25 FollowingSteven Wild @YouSirNayme22
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7 Followers 26 FollowingMauro Luinetti @MLuinetti
4 Followers 60 FollowingBlueIron @I3lueIron
121 Followers 2K Following Fan of games of all kinds Streaming (when I can) My schedule changes all the time https://t.co/asC7bqlijpSlummy Mum @slummymum
90 Followers 429 Following I am a proud slummy mummy - I love my family, I work full time and I am passionate about feminism and diversity.... and I'm terrible at housework!Kat Dee 💎 @skeletalfinger
37 Followers 142 Following Novelist 📚 Writer ✒️ 📜 TV and Film enthusiast 📺🎬 Far too opinionated 🤨 Love Eastenders💂♂️ 😍 - I also love cop shows! 👮♀️🚔Jose ramirez @BandFortaleza
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17 Followers 435 Following If you don't want an egg sandwich, there's no reason for you to be here.Chucky @ChuckyIsReal
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5K Followers 78 Following Celebrating Phenomenal voices & @phenomenalbooks by centering women & underrepresented communities. Co-producing @strangeloopbway @salesman_bway.darth™ @darth
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21.5M Followers 2K Following owner: @aviationgin - @MintMobile - @maximumeffort - @Wrexham_AFC❤️ Jameela Jamil .. @jameelajamil
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119 Followers 428 Following ICU RN, research nerd, Canadian expat, slow runner, fast talker, happy lifter, pop culture lover, bad feminist. Views my own.Zack Bornstein @ZackBornstein
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51K Followers 2K Following #GrandCrew on @nbc / #Digman on @comedycentral / @collegehumor / @ucbtla / #JFL / sheMaggie Maxwell @maggiemxwell
1K Followers 1K Following Comedy Writer & Performer. I put the "humor" in "humorless feminist." @goldcomedy @KidsTheseDaysHa @bringthefunny @reductress, cohost - Would You Rather she/herIngrid Ostby @ingridostby
5K Followers 551 FollowingHeidi Lux 🇵🇱�.. @Heidi_Lux
983 Followers 821 Following Watched Crushed on @Tubi bc I wrote it!! |TV writer - Nickelodeon| managing editress @The_Belladonnas| satire up on @Reductress @McSweeneys & moreSeeing way too much “college kids are out of control” and not enough “they’ve uncovered multiple civilian mass graves in Palestine”
If you’re involved in any of these anti-genocide actions at universities, please make sure to save your emails, flyers and other papers so that in 50 years your university can proudly display them as part of their special collections
This would be the funniest way to reveal Kate Middleton back to the world
'The Masked Singer' introduced four new contestants on Billy Joel Night, and revealed one — Spaghetti & Meatballs — as this TV personality and restaurateur. ew.com/the-masked-sin…
i too would do a gone girl if my bald ass husband cheated on me with someone who looked exactly like me but horsier
@Reductress @DriveAwayDolls @FocusFeatures it's me, i'm the mom
I wrote this for Reductress and spent the next two years receiving emails that were half-death threat-ish and half "is this actually satire pelase tell me i can't stop crying"
We sat down with the stars of Lisa Frankenstein @colesprouse and @kathrynnewton to talk about the hottest historical figures they’d raise from the dead, and got some insightful dating advice for our fans. @lisafrankenfilm premieres in theaters nationwide This Friday.
I'm just looking for somebody to talk to and show me some love if you know what I mean
Hey I couldn’t be more excited to partner with my favorite @Reductress to bring you the OH BUDDY, BIG FEELINGS crewneck sweatshirt. Go get it here! shop.reductress.com/collections/sw…
Kellyanne: I think Democrats wake up every morning and they look at the calendar on the iPhone and it says January 6th. The date never changes. And then they get into an electric vehicle and go get an abortion.
this is a Reductress post
Dear Abby: I’m 22, I think my 55-year-old boyfriend just wants me for sex trib.al/yuvtpB9
Keep your chin up Matt Rife…they don’t wanna see a black man win
“Look, it is true that Gazans did at one point elect Hamas. But if you think that makes them all complicit in war crimes their government commits, then boy, do I have bad news for you about decades of U.S. foreign policy.” - @iamjohnoliver huffpost.com/entry/john-oli…
Media news: G/O Media is shutting down Jezebel after failing to find a buyer. Memo just went out from Jim Spanfeller:
id personally never speak again if martin scorsese and robert de niro did this to me
Leonardo DiCaprio's improv on the "Flower Moon' set wasn't always flawless. Martin Scorsese says: “Every now and then, [Robert De Niro] and I would look at each other and roll our eyes a little bit. And we’d tell [Leo], ‘You don’t need that dialogue.’” variety.com/2023/film/news…
Boy math is needing 15 attempts to count the votes correctly to become Speaker and then shutting down the government 9 months later