Nick Swardson @NickSwardson
BACK ON TOUR!! All 2024 dates in bio link nickswardson.net Joined November 2011-
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Followers561K
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Following2K
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Nick Swardson retweeted
Eclipse is coming soon, time to channel my inner @NickSwardson
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Happy Easter. He has risen. We praise him. So many blessings. His name is Carrot Top. 🙏
You have two options. Dune 2 or Swardson live on the east coast. Niagra Falls, Mohegan Sun and Philly. Spoiler alert they’re the exact same. Nickswardson.net
Next up: - Niagra Falls - Mohegan Sun - Parx Philly UPPER EAST COAST Then Vikings Super Bowl !(crying naked at a petting zoo snorting squirrel pubes) nickswardson.net
Fort Lauderdale, FL THIS WEEK!! Dania Improv. Only fart edibles nickswardson.net
I wanted Fields. Fuck!!! Guess I’m moving to Colorado. 🤷♂️
Headed to the Denver airport. Ugh. What are your least favorite airports. This is in my top 3 with maybe JFK and O’Hare. Favorite is obviously Narnia airport.
So, been a weird week to say the least. Then this football news comes in hot. Packers got better and so did every team. We better draft the fucking Hulk or Mark Rosen on crack. Fuck. @MeatSauce1
Just casually woke up on TMZ. Travel tip: don’t drink and take edibles in high altitude. Fucking brain diarrhea. I’ll make it up to you Beaver Creek! ❤️
Aspen, COLORADO! March 5th. Belly Up. 2 shows. A lot of cologne farts.
#Top4Xmen Wolverine. Gambit. Nightcrawler. CarrotTop
OXNARD, CA, shows this weekend. Possibly my favorite name ever. What’s a better REAL city/town name? I’ll fact check it. Nickswardson.net 4 tix
OXNARD, CA this weekend. Full Nards. Nickswardson.net 4 tix
OAHU TONIGHT! Hawaiian Theater nickswardson.net
CALIFORNIA SHOWS 2024 Feb: 2-4 La Jolla Feb: 8-10 Irvine Feb: 16-18 Oxnard nickswardson.net
HAWAII shows Maui - Thursday Oahu - Friday! nickswardson.net
So people know I’m dropping a special this year and a new fall theater tour with a new hour. That’ll be announced soon.
Denver can’t wait!
Nick Swardson retweeted
Comedian/Actor @NickSwardson's stand-up comedy show is THIS Thursday, Jan. 18, in the Castle Theater! Tickets are on sale at: bit.ly/3QWrqYm #NickSwardson #LiveAtTheMACC #MauiStandUpComedy #MauiArtsAndCulture #MauiComedyShows #ComedyShowsAtTheMACC
Back on the road this weekend!! TAHOE TOMORROW!!
Back on the road this weekend!! TAHOE TOMORROW!!
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Eclipse is coming soon, time to channel my inner @NickSwardson
@NickSwardson @NickSwardson I choose Nick Swardson at Parx….LFG
Took my wife to a @NickSwardson show a while back and now she refuses to attend any stand up comedy shows with me ever again
Colin Farrell loved filming The Penguin but is "so glad to be done with it" #ColinFarrell #ThePenguin
Hope you get a taxi and a drink soon, man - SKOL VIKES 🤘🏼@NickSwardson
@NickSwardson Can he use his powers or props to resurrect Norm?
@NickSwardson Great show in Niagara Falls last night Nick, F*ck Montreal! 🤣
@NickSwardson Saw you live last night. Amazing show. Couldn’t stop laughing
@TiberiusJamesT @NickSwardson “Is the board spelt bored?”
@TheRealDudja @NickSwardson @RENO911CAPS Lmfao the best. Gay robot also an extremely underrated character
Omfg. When you laugh at @NickSwardson and he complements your laugh. Tonight was everything @NickSwardson thank you!!!!
@NickSwardson bro. U killed it last night!!!! Thanks
@NickSwardson No, I don’t want to ride your sandworm.
@NickSwardson Skol eithier way! Just bustin your balls😂😂
@NickSwardson Dallas, Denver & Newark! Though Denver has a Chic-Fil-A and thats a bonus.
@NickSwardson Check out the apocalypse murals: They were placed in the west and east wings of the airport near baggage claims, so they are hard for travelers to avoid. They are so fucking weird, and tin foil hat material for conspiracy bros. Enjoy
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