Senor Spongester @Spongester

The unauthorized account for Spongester, the sponge of Damocles. favstar.fm/users/Spongest… Beside your sink. Joined December 2009

Tweets

1K
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229
Following

752
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2K

Smith &Company ⚖ ™ @Justica4all

6 years ago

@ericspiegelman This

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Sarah Silverman @SarahKSilverman

6 years ago

I really hope @NYGovCuomo sees this awesome @RandyRainbow video from one great New Yorker to another (@chelseahandler you got competish)

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Lance Parkin @ParkinLance

6 years ago

Boomers: the Coronavirus is important, because it kills people over 60, let's close the borders Millennials/Gen Z: It is called COVID-19 and its spread shows how connected the world is, how health is a social justice issue. Gen X: Too ra loo ra too ra loo rye aye. COVID-EILEEN

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Todd 'Papi' Carlos @TheToddWilliams

6 years ago

In England, math is called crisps

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Matt Oswalt @MattOswaltVA

7 years ago

I guess his other shirt, "Build the wall or I'll gargle your balls" was at the drycleaners

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Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien

7 years ago

A detail lost in the story of Jesus: how frequently, and early in the day he began turning water into wine.

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Dan Rather @DanRather

8 years ago

Just a thought: Which should be considered more “marginal” - believing in Santa at age 7 or not believing in climate change at age 72?

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Fred Delicious 🍆 @Fred_Delicious

8 years ago

Siri, show me the worst possible combination of words independent.co.uk/arts-entertain…

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Paul F. Tompkins @PFTompkins

8 years ago

Becoming a grandparent is the one time it’s acceptable to choose your own nickname and people blow it EVERY TIME. Why would you be Grampy when you could be DEATHBLADE.

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ceej @ceejoyner

8 years ago

said some terrible things about a coworker's newborn when she called it a "week old baby" and I thought we were roasting it

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Senor Spongester @Spongester

8 years ago

Leaving Michigan.

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The Hill @thehill

8 years ago

GOP strategist: Trump "beclowned himself" at G7 summit hill.cm/rjNJ8Qn

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Eli Braden @EliBraden

8 years ago

Roseanne puts the “Ambien” in “I am bein’ racist”

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Jess Dweck @TheDweck

8 years ago

To show their patriotism, before kickoff every NFL player will be required to conspire with a foreign adversary to influence a US election

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Stephen Colbert @StephenAtHome

8 years ago

South Korean official response: “We are attempting to make sense of what, precisely, President Trump means.” Welcome to the fucking club.

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billy eichner @billyeichner

8 years ago

If Obama had found the cure to cancer Trump wouldn't let us use it.

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Senor Spongester @Spongester

10 years ago

A towel on the rack means I'll use it again. A towel on the floor...please replace. A towel in the suitcase...I am taking this towel.

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Danny Zuker @DannyZuker

9 years ago

Dear Trump Base, Last night while you were sleeping the Senate fucked you. They didn’t even leave you any money on the dresser. In fact, they stole your dressers & gave them to families that have plenty of dressers like the Trumps & the Clintons. #TaxBillScam