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Tweets190
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Followers21K
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Following40
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Likes158
Why was the insomniac so boring? -He just wasn’t into resting!- 🥱🛌💤 #dadjokes
Why did the frog have to leave the job site? -He was wearing open toad shoes!- #dadjokes 🐸🚧🏗️🧰🦺
Where do clowns learn to ski? -Hill areas!- 🤡⛷️❄️ #dadjokes
Why do trains like bubblegum? -They love to chew chew!- 🍬🛤️🚂 #dadjokes
What’s a scarecrow’s favorite fruit? -Strawberries!- 🌾👩🌾🍓
Why was the butcher afraid to reach for the meat? -The steaks were too high!- 🥩🐮🔪 #dadjokes
Dad Joke Why do gas stations charge you to fill up your tires? Inflation
Why couldn’t the logger finish the crossword? -He was stumped!- #dadjokes
Nothing makes you feel younger than watching people take pictures with an iPad.
What do you call cheese that accidentally escapes the International Space Station? Space Da Brie I’m here all week, thanks.
If a child refuses to nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
Why did the tailor bring luggage to court? -It was a suitcase!- 🪡🧵🧳🧑⚖️ #dadjokes
TheComedyPickaxe @comedypickaxe
10 Followers 49 Following What's up, Cyberspace! Welcome to The Comedy Pickaxe. A weekly comedy show about everything and nothing! Tune in for laughs, stories, and terrible jokes.
They call me DADA @_DadPreneur
138 Followers 334 Following Welcome to my world, where I balance fatherhood's joys with entrepreneurial challenges. Join my journey of family, dreams, and daily balance. 👨👩👦🧑💻🍼💸
Craig Harrison @CraigHa75393540
3 Followers 8 Following
Ulfric Norseman @misplacednorse
349 Followers 414 Following I talk to gators. You've been warned. Apparently, Y'all aren't getting this. I'm not here to be nice.
Coach Irv @CoachIrvinPayne
101 Followers 214 Following Walter Johnson HS Girls basketball coach. ParaEducator. Let’s grow this next generation together!
Ronnie Ware @WareRonnie74497
0 Followers 55 Following
MrAdora @theseventeeeen_
1 Followers 104 Following
Cody Scarberry @CodyScarbe32122
66 Followers 255 Following
riddlesndadjokes @riddlesnda35271
12 Followers 26 Following Welcome to Riddled, your daily source for #dadjoke #riddles and #humor. Visit us on our other social media platforms.
cormac doyle @ballawley
212 Followers 2K Following
Jill Waltrip @JillWaltrip5
15 Followers 89 Following
Jordan Dilliplane @Jdill_10
3 Followers 15 Following
Carol Garland @GarlandCarol
1K Followers 5K Following
Dad Jokes @DadJokesSolana
93 Followers 128 Following That's what I'm token about! Web/tg will happen when I'm done fixing the toilet.
overcookedtofu @overcookedtofu
11 Followers 24 Following
Mr. Clean Comedy @MrCleanComedy
66 Followers 260 Following Follow for all kinds of humor, one liners, puns, and dad jokes. But, like, not the dirty ones. 🧼🤣
Timothy Credits @TimothyCredits
2K Followers 2K Following Open to work as UI Designer & illustrator || Obsessed With Outer Space
Gers007 @JustSports007
71 Followers 260 Following
ZeldaNerd @ZeldaNerd794254
0 Followers 60 Following She/her/them. Closeted aroace gamer who plays Mario, Zelda, Pokémon, and Pikmin games. I'm a Zelink shipper, and you can't stop me.
Bitcoin Bowhunter @CryptoBow82
3K Followers 5K Following Educating society about the nature of money. Fix the money, fix the world! #Bitcoin #2A #FreedomMaximalist #Libertarian #Carnivore 🥩
deborah padden @deborah_padden
26 Followers 307 Following
Bryce @Brycencarroll_
30 Followers 15 Following
aj @hairloss30
82 Followers 449 Following
Celeb Joke (parody) @celeb_joke
37 Followers 116 Following AI generated celebrities telling jokes (parody)
Charles @suburbdad57913
2 Followers 5 Following
CanadaBear @CanadaBear76
0 Followers 86 Following
Vintage Vibes @vintage_vibes24
677 Followers 2K Following Nostalgic soul. Obsessed with vintage advertisements, thrift shopping, NFL Football, Fitness and Coffee. #FlyEaglesFly #coffee #vintage
David Adam @iamelonbrother
36 Followers 240 Following
LoJean @loieJD
70 Followers 1K Following My regular account got hacked or something - Loiejean. I had 1,500 followers. Starting over. Ron Paul Libertarian/Fiscal Conservative, Anti-War, Health, Stocks.
Rncruuzyy @RaiRaisha20
13 Followers 49 Following
Colin Dunn @cdunnrunn
47 Followers 407 Following
FarmerJack Jokes @FarmerjackJokes
15 Followers 39 Following
lucas @I_dont_know_255
0 Followers 46 Following
Joe @JoeSKansas
14 Followers 87 Following
Ivan Ssemaganda @IvanSsemag66754
41 Followers 171 Following
Raj Nadar @tpsnadar
15 Followers 549 Following
#captwin Philly @CaptwinP
55 Followers 154 Following
S Brinklow @Brinx77
46 Followers 52 Following Going to get banned Follow my P&W band on Spotify, YouTube, Pandora, and Apple music
Abraham @Lequed9
77 Followers 138 Following
Amman Oyiza @AmmanOyiza2876
3 Followers 189 Following
Adam Howlett @ADAMHOWLETT
54 Followers 109 Following
Alex Rigg @riggy1009
20 Followers 419 Following
Rani Kaur @RaniKaur1353234
1 Followers 17 Following
blue_macaw @thebluemancaw
50 Followers 54 Following
AlphaPropMaint @AlphaPropMaint
3 Followers 41 Following
Tim Allen @ofctimallen
1.1M Followers 34 Following Santa? Buzz Lightyear? The Tool Man? Mike Baxter? Hey, I’m still that wisecracking kid from the Midwest, looking for answers to life’s big questions.
Dudes Posting Their W.. @DudespostingWs
2.3M Followers 27 Following Ironically Funny and Wholesome. DMs open for submissions 🥂 DM for Removal or Credit
President Biden @POTUS
34.8M Followers 5 Following 46th President of the United States, husband to @FLOTUS, proud dad & pop. Tweets may be archived: https://t.co/HDhBZBkKpU Text me: (302) 404-0880
Taylor Swift @taylorswift13
95.4M Followers 0 Following All’s fair in love and poetry... New album THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT. Out now 🤍
9to5Toys @9to5toys
85K Followers 16 Following We've got gadgets, gear, and the best deals on the web
Well Told @welltolddesign
918 Followers 2K Following Well Told: distinctive, well-made goods and gifts that tell your story.
World and Science @WorldAndScience
2.5M Followers 26 Following Frequently updated assortment of tweets related to the world of science (with some side tracking) - As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases
Hyperloop @Hyperloop
257K Followers 82 Following Official Twitter account for the @SpaceX Hyperloop Pod Competition
rmn @russelneiss
88K Followers 0 Following
SpaceX @SpaceX
34.6M Followers 113 Following SpaceX designs, manufactures and launches the world’s most advanced rockets and spacecraft
Faraday Future @FaradayFuture
69K Followers 50 Following We are a global intelligent mobility ecosystem company focused on empowering people everywhere to live, move, connect & breathe freely. @FaradayFutureAE
Tim Cook @tim_cook
14.9M Followers 70 Following Apple CEO Auburn 🏀 🏈 Duke 🏀 National Parks 🏞️ “Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?'” - MLK. he/him
The Hill @thehill
4.4M Followers 345 Following The Hill is the premier source for policy and political news. Follow for tweets on what's happening in Washington, breaking news and retweets of our reporters.
TIME @TIME
19.3M Followers 491 Following News and current events from around the globe. Since 1923. Subscribe: https://t.co/yT0dueLEm0
Coach Harbaugh @CoachJim4UM
1.9M Followers 635 Following University of Michigan J. Ira and Nicki Harris Family Head Football Coach.
Nicole Curtis @nicolecurtis
112K Followers 598 Following BMX racer-in my spare time, I’m also a TV producer, fierce advocate for good things & that blonde #rehabaddict @hgtv
WIRED @WIRED
10.0M Followers 452 Following Where tomorrow is realized || Sign up for our newsletters: https://t.co/webmuFK9lN
The Economist @TheEconomist
27.3M Followers 159 Following News and analysis with a global perspective. We’re here to help you understand the world around you. Subscribe here: https://t.co/RpUQAAnhog
Bill Clinton @BillClinton
13.1M Followers 39 Following Father, grandfather, 42nd President of the United States, Founder, Clinton Foundation. Follow @ClintonFdn for more on our work around the world.
Elon Musk @elonmusk
181.7M Followers 585 Following
Dana Carvey @danacarvey
332K Followers 48K Following TheWeirdPlace : https://t.co/KTkix3ndeg - SuperFly : https://t.co/gB8k3znYe9 - FlyOnTheWall : https://t.co/gB8k3znYe9
Bill Gates @BillGates
64.6M Followers 586 Following Sharing things I'm learning through my foundation work and other interests.
Lance Armstrong @lancearmstrong
3.0M Followers 747 Following Father of 5, Founder @wedusport, partner at @nextventuresvc, endurance junkie, and 7 MJ’s.
Britney Spears 🌹�.. @britneyspears
54.7M Followers 345K Following Artist 🎶💃🏼 Mamma 👩👦👦 Pray Every Day 🙏🏼✝️ Chef in the works💋👩🏼🍳
Justin Timberlake @jtimberlake
60.8M Followers 341 Following I write hooks but I’m really just here for the bridge.
Mitch Landrieu @MitchLandrieu
89K Followers 2K Following Founder, @unumfund | @CNN Political Commentator | Former Mayor of New Orleans | NYT bestseller, In the Shadow of Statues: A White Southerner Confronts History
Neil Patrick Harris @ActuallyNPH
24.4M Followers 167 Following Husband, father, random sayer of stuff. ALSO click the link below if you want to level up in Awesometown (or subscribe to exclusive content from yours truly).
Aziz Ansari @azizansari
9.5M Followers 0 Following Pasta lover. I don't tweet much. My new Netflix series Master of None is now streaming on Netflix. I wrote a book called Modern Romance.Happy Valentine’s Day to my forever Valentine!
33 Raptor engine static fire attempt soon
I clicked an unsubscribe link in an email and got taken to this page and I swear this should be illegal
He’s only your fiancé if he comes from the Fiancé region of France. Otherwise he’s just your sparkling boyfriend. A brosecco.
Why did the scarecrow win so many awards? -He was outstanding in his field!- 🌾👨🌾🌾 #dadjokes
So my brother walks up to me and says Hey can you hold this pamphlet? Then I go.... Bro sure Please don't unfollow me 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 #DadJokes @101dadjokes
Today we celebrate the wisdom, the fun, and the unfailing support of fathers everywhere. To my dad, and dads at Apple and beyond, thanks for all you do! Happy Father’s Day!
Tesla #FSDBeta making some impressive moves driving on the opposite side of the road to a void a closed lane. Full video 🚦youtu.be/qiBhjHWjP2g 🛑 @Tesla @elonmusk
Wishing a very Happy Father’s Day to all of the incredible dads out there - And thanks for all you do for us, not just today, but all year round. #FathersDay #HappyFathersDay #Dadjokes @101dadjokes
Thanks to everyone who worked so hard to make Tesla successful. My heart goes out to you.
Close the door, there is a draught in the bar @DadJokeMan @DadsPuns @101dadjokes
I don’t seem to be having much trouble getting people to “social distance” from me.
Dad-Joke Alert…. If the Chicago Bears moved to Detroit Michigan, then Detroit would field the Lions, the Tigers, and the Bears. Oh MI !
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