zynon girl of the 21st century @wendys4forwhore
not only mildly ridiculous but absurdly so. she/her. austin, tx Joined October 2010-
Tweets78K
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Followers1K
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Following386
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Likes3K
me yesterday when I got stopped at a red light for 9 minutes
me yesterday when I got stopped at a red light for 9 minutes
packing a bouillon cube in my upper lip like a zyn
Pastor opening his sermon after finding out his wife cheated on him:
Pastor opening his sermon after finding out his wife cheated on him:
There are really only two seasons: soup salad
Could a depressed person do this? *builds long straw so I can drink juice in bed without sitting up*
Boss is off today so that means I’ll be driving the forklift to the strip club at lunch
not you went on a date w mr.krabs lmao
we been hearing "boys will be boys" since we started walking on this earth. You'll be alright. Suck it up bubba
we been hearing "boys will be boys" since we started walking on this earth. You'll be alright. Suck it up bubba
The HOA can suck my balls, this dude is going on my lawn.
I get a 3 year retention bonus at work and it’s split up over every quarter. So i’ll damn near be at 4 years by the time I get it all… but the 5 year bonus is a quarter of my annual income. Guess I’m locked in for a bit here
I'll probably never get the credit for keeping most of my crazy in check
wonder what he’s up to these days
I am howling 😂😂😂😂😂😂
i have no comeback for this
inside of me is a hateful cunt and the kindest girl in the world both fighting for dominance
the only correct answer
the only correct answer https://t.co/ud2NDGToil
A girl recently told me “guys love to show you a video” and now she will never get a video out of me. She messed up. I have so many videos
is he… y’know… *imitates crab claws*… from maryland???
i would like to learn other languages, but only so i can eavesdrop more broadly
Joelle 🍌 @Joelle__M12
3 Followers 491 Following Wаnt to indulgе in а pleаsurablе аnd eхciting аdvеnturе?
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Grey @sadbokkie
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Ryan Robinette Fan - .. @ryanrobinettef1
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madie @melllomad
32 Followers 185 Following I will use somebody's laugh to gauge if I trust them or not. I don't trust somebody until I hear their laugh&know that it's, like, a full real laugh -john lurie
marissa @mlmyers24
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subway rat 🐀 @ScarletO_SARAH
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Jake ♡ @ninkiiminjajj
2K Followers 3K Following "𝙏𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙪𝙜𝙡𝙮 𝙗𝙞𝙩𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙗𝙤𝙤𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙢𝙮 𝙚𝙜𝙤" Cupcakke follows 🌸
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omg me @BlondeHazy
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PAZ @pazpaz
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@[email protected].. @JonBaker
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marissa @mlmyers24
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yalls obsession w celebrity sex lives is so weird and invasive
DONALD GLOVER IS FUCKING CHILDISH GAMBINO????
“Cocky want boing boing” is going in mental rotation
At the beach - Where the hoes at? Cocky want boing boing!
a mouse leaving his apartment: phone, wallet, cheese
😭
It is with a heavy heart that we announce the passing of our beloved retired mascot, Butler Blue III, aka “Trip,” at the age of 12 after a brief illness. Trip’s jersey and portrait will be displayed in Atherton Union from Monday, April 8, through Sunday, April 14.
You drank so much white monster it turned you into one
this was peak comedy
What video is the reason they shouldn’t ban TikTok?
I just did all of these. I feel wrung out like a towel.
Idk how critical shit is on your end but… this nigga saved my fuckin life 😭😭
They’re big but I wouldn’t say they’re ostrich sized
Sydney Sweeney: ‘I had boobs before other girls and I felt ostracized’ trib.al/Ly1ddyV
my boyfriend made a letterboxd because i asked him to and the only thing he’s done on it is give tenet 5 stars and say “this shit whips ass.” he has not even followed me back
I'm not allowed to eat sugar because I get violent
“therapy doesn’t work for me” ok well I hate to break it to you but the mental illness isn’t working for you either
they put so many potatoes on my spicy soft taco that i’m blushing
@wendys4forwhore I mean yeah as far as storms go she was serving major cunt Yanno
*bites through your collarbone* sorry i just thought you were cute
for the small price of 3-4 drinks i will act so so weird to you!!
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