irritable @virtual_summer

Chief Butt of the Guild of Fools and Joculators cyberspace Joined December 2008

Tweets

18K
Followers

511
Following

562
Likes

64K

irritable @virtual_summer

2 days ago

Criminal that I have to go back to work next week after basically living in my own opium den on the couch all week healing from surgery what a cruel world

0 0 1 34 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

4 days ago

My face feels like it got hit by a truck but I had to make myself do something and eat something good

0 0 2 39 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

4 days ago

@elsathora You’ve gotta try the Velveeta macaroni and cheese too, it comes with a packet of bright orange goo and it’s so salty and wonderful

0 0 0 33 0

View Details

meg “Yooper” bitchell @MeganBitchell

5 days ago

This sounds like a spider made it

so my best friend sent me this song that Tyra Banks made herself for a dystopian young adult book she wrote over a decade ago and i'm being so serious i think she officially made the worst song of all time

548 3K 36K 5.8M 16K

24 822 11K 473K 1K

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

4 days ago

@somethings_awry The gray Bic is so good for a pen so commonplace and cheap

0 0 1 52 0

View Details

merrin @wowzowee

5 days ago

When the stuff at target starts sounding like a diy venue lineup

30 946 22K 351K 602

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

4 days ago

Besides all of the negatives at least I can revel in the time-honored American/Appalachian pastime with less guilt: taking opiates and sleeping on the couch watching recordings of Adult Swim from 2002 with commercials on YouTube and eating mac and cheese and chicken nuggets

0 0 1 50 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

5 days ago

(Weakly) I lived bitch

2 0 6 295 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

5 days ago

@rxckrxdxscxlvxs Thank you!!!! Feeling confident so far but that could be some anesthesia still in my system hahaha

0 0 1 11 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

5 days ago

@rxckrxdxscxlvxs @wonton_sarah They don’t know any mid 30s alcoholics

0 0 2 9 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

7 days ago

This could be healthy except for you can tell just by looking there’s like 4 tablespoons of bacon fat and 3 of butter involved in the process but we can pretend that there’s enough vegetables in here to balance it

0 0 2 45 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

7 days ago

Have surgery on Monday so I meal prepped a bunch of badass fucked up burritos to freeze

1 0 2 59 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

2 weeks ago

Drank a couple of glasses of wine while cooking and accidentally maybe turned my miso butter sauce into whole ass gravy when I went too hard on the flour but now I’ve invented miso butter gravy and it’s delicious and fine

0 0 4 79 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

2 weeks ago

Every time we go to my husband’s mom’s house I remember this high school photo of him where he looked exactly like Reese from Malcolm in the Middle

0 0 1 64 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

2 weeks ago

@rxckrxdxscxlvxs Come to WV!!!!

0 0 1 15 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

3 weeks ago

I boutta bounce my piss out

0 0 0 33 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

3 weeks ago

When you’re cat sitting and someone says you’ll probably never see one of the cats but you’re pure of heart

0 0 0 35 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

4 weeks ago

Gonna be honest idk if I’ve baked anything since October and it took 4 feedings from the fridge to awaken my starter but this loaf was made with buttermilk and it was so goddamn good my husband and I just ate half of it smothered in butter. I just gained 5 pounds

0 0 0 78 0

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

10 months ago

Haven’t used my starter since July and accidentally fell asleep all day while I was working on the dough and way overproofed it so I made focaccia for the first time and it was pretty okay. A little dense for focaccia but tastes good

1 0 0 74 1

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

2 years ago

I have received my first sourdough starter I am sooooo scared have I entered into a nightmare

1 0 6 2K 2

View Details

irritable @virtual_summer

4 weeks ago

@alaskastardust Cucumbers are one of my favorite vegetables because of the water yet the crunch but I would never say they don’t have a flavor. There is a distinct scent and taste to cucumber