dust bunny hostage @dbhostage

Eccl. 3:20 All came from the dust and all return to the dust. **My house isn't dirty, I'm just living in my natural environment** she/her/mom-like💛 Deep South, Y'all Joined March 2008

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dust bunny hostage @dbhostage

2 days ago

Message for one specific person: I’m not going to text you and take a chance on waking you up BUT if you are awake and scrolling - HI!! I got the class time wrong. Of course I did. It’s SIX, not 5:00. Gonna get an Arby’s ham and Swiss and pout for an hour. 😁

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Wholesome Side of 𝕏 @itsme_urstruly

2 weeks ago

every time I buy a new notebook there is a brief but powerful moment where I genuinely believe I am about to become the most organized human alive

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Todd Spence @Todd_Spence

a month ago

Someone edited THE THREE AMIGOS vs. TOMBSTONE and it fits so perfectly 😂🔥

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YOWSA! @_Yowsa_

a month ago

Wonder Woman chasing a car on a skateboard is everything I love about cheesy tv shows. Plus, it's Lynda Carter as #WonderWoman. 😍

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Wholesome Side of 𝕏 @itsme_urstruly

2 months ago

Don’t let anyone talk you out of that thirty minute before bed read. Those two hours will be the most relaxing five hours you ever spend.

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dust bunny hostage @dbhostage

2 months ago

@ronniesquirrel Ooooh!! That’s nice 😍 I have fine straight hair - wonder if it would curl like this.

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FireFighterDev @fire_starter457

2 months ago

Dear Christians, Jesus didn’t warn us about LGBTQ people or atheists. He warned us about religious people who love power more than the truth. I hope this rings a bell.

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dust bunny hostage @dbhostage

3 months ago

@PastorTrey05 “Shoot, me neither.” I laughed out loud but also, it’s refreshing.

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Wholesome Side of 𝕏 @itsme_urstruly

3 months ago

His family decided he was ready to be left home alone for the first time today. As it turns out, freedom can be a little awkward. I feel like he climbed on the table just to see what it felt like to be a rebel. 😂

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CooperBaggs 💰🍞 @edgaralandough

3 months ago

you only get: 1 summer with them as a baby 3 as a toddler 5 as a child 3 as a preteen 6 as a teen so let them run barefoot, turn on the sprinkler, cut up the watermelon, chase fireflies under fading golden skies because the summers of sticky hands, sun tired kids, and slow evenings filled with the sounds of childhood do not last forever 🤍

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PUNS @ThePunnyWorld

3 months ago

9 year old "Hey Dad, I have a pun for you" "Ooh what is it"? 9 year old "It's like a joke, where you play with words". I JUST GOT LESLIE NIELSENED BY MY OWN CHILD.

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PUNS @ThePunnyWorld

3 months ago

Interviewer: Can you perform under pressure? Me: I can do the Bowie part, but I don't have the upper range to sing the Freddie part.

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We don't deserve cats 😺 @catsareblessing

3 months ago

When your cat becomes the most perfect geometric shape ⭕

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James Lucas @JamesLucasIT

3 months ago

We grew up watching hand drawn Disney and now it's just gone. We don't talk about this enough.

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bonky • exmo priestess @KirtonMcBonky

3 months ago

🎂 I volunteer to bake birthday cakes for kids in Foster Care/shelters This girl turning 4 asked for an Elsa cake I tried sugar work and it turned out so cute! I had 3 mini heart attacks and 1 existential crisis while breaking those sugar glass shards but LOOK AT THIS CAKE!

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Trey Ferguson @PastorTrey05

3 months ago

Good morning, beloved. You have what it takes to make a difference. Today is a great day to overcome evil with good.

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‏ً @omgsidewalks

3 months ago

A lot of "mental health issues" disappear when bills are paid, rent is secure, and the fridge is full. Peace is expensive. And pretending money doesn't affect mental health is privilege.