Profanisaurus @VProfanisaurus
Tweeting profane words and expressions from the Profanisaurus. UNOFFICIAL. PARODY. The Bigg Market Joined January 2013-
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Profanisaurus retweeted
Vin Diesel: 1. n. prop. Gravel-voiced, bald actor who always wears sunglasses. 2. n. Happy Shopper wine costing less than £2, and which leaves one gravel-voiced, bald and wearing sunglasses. Screwtop.
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Profanisaurus retweeted
tea strainer: n. A bowel movement that is forcibly withheld during teabreak so that one can have a tom tit and get paid for the pleasure. Time and a turd, taking one on the company's time.
Profanisaurus retweeted
M & S turd: euph. A shite which is worthy of special attention due to its exceptional quality. “This is not just a turd, this is a five-day matured, chicken vindaloo with garlic naan and eight bottles of Cobra turd.”
Profanisaurus retweeted
R Kelly weather: n. A chill in the air during the summer. When the temperature is "dipping into the teens". From the singer's alleged, though we must stress completely unproven, penchant for cooling meteorological conditions.
nangerine: adj. The characteristic orange skin tone of biddies who over-winter in Tenerife.
drop shot: n. An expertly executed hockle, neatly nutmegged between the thighs, the rim of the shit-pan and the Autotrader while sat on the shitter.
mid-loaf crisis: n. Anything that spoils the enjoyment of a good tom tit, eg. A doorbell or telephone ringing, a dawning realisation that there is no bumwad, or a policeman approaching the shop doorway.
virgin poo: n. The first turd laid at work after the cleaning lady has scrubbed the rim.
Profanisaurus retweeted
gentle giant: n. A shit so big that it brings tears to your eyes, but which gently kisses you on the cheek just before it leaves. A French lodger.
greggings: n. The seemingly standard lower-body attire of ladies about town who have, one might infer, a penchant for pies.
coke zero: n. Bacon powder that contains little or no genuine sniff.
owner operator: n. A lorry driver who sheds his load wherever the fancy takes him.
meat and two veg: n. A gentleman's undercarriage. A pork sausage and a couple of love spuds.
plasterer's radio: sim. Descriptive of a lucky lady who is heavily adorned with jelly jewellery. Frequently found on Japanese and American cyber-scud.
chin: v. To successfully belabour in a bout of fisticuffs. 'I could fucking chin him, easy.'
fubes: n. 13 amp, usually ginger, pubes. Contraction of fusewire + pubes.
Greggs tie: n. The vertical pasty-flake mess that adorns the front of your shirt, jumper or vest following the swift and careless consumption of a prolish comestible.
tea chicken: n. Game played by severely hungover flatmates, whereby they all sit immobile waiting for the first one to bottle it and offer to put the kettle on.
bum lungs: n. Additional, apparently rectally situated, breathing apparatus which allows members of the fairer sex to speak for extended periods of time without pausing for breath.
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