Tim Vine @RealTimVine
Comedian. Plastic Elvis. https://t.co/V1C4agGVpJ https://t.co/qwcXHSNiwa timvine.com UK Joined July 2011-
Tweets14K
-
Followers322K
-
Following124
-
Likes519
When it comes to curtains what’s your preference, eyelet or rod pocket?
When Judge Judy goes off to her little office to make a phone call I know we the viewer can hear what she’s saying but can the people in the courtroom? @JudyJustice
How about we have VAR but it’s there at the ref on the pitch’s discretion to look at it. In other words the pitch ref makes decisions and it’s only if HE wants that VAR is consulted. That would be better for the crowd in the stadium.
Tim Vine retweeted
@RealTimVine I’m following the 2 blokes talking, I’m a commentary supporter.
I may not be from Coventry but that equalising goal just bounced me out of my seat like a Jack in a box.
Everyone thinking the same thing. Can Man United beat Coventry like Sutton did?
If Coventry get a third the old Wembley towers are going to tremble in their graves.
What’s this called? I need a new one.
If there was a computer, so zero sentiment involved, just going on stats from the last month. Just hard cold stats…What would England’s starting 11 be if they were playing tonight? Someone ask AI that question.
What a great bloke. Very inspiring.
What a great bloke. Very inspiring.
Every comedian with props will have had this conversation. I know I’m not the only one.
It’s had it coming for years to be honest.
Victoria Coren Mitche.. @VictoriaCoren
707K Followers 687 Following writer, broadcaster and poker player
Mark Watson @watsoncomedian
262K Followers 4K Following ‘One of the most genuinely joyous presences in comedy’ - The Times. Tour dates and book details on website. Personal messages https://t.co/4P0kjAp17O
Milton Jones @themiltonjones
384K Followers 387 Following 2024 Tour HA!MILTON on sale now! https://t.co/d3sOZ748va Hee/Hee rep: [email protected] voices: [email protected]
Taskmaster @taskmaster
280K Followers 160 Following Official account for #Taskmaster. New episodes Thursdays at 9pm on Channel 4. Watch full episodes on All4 and YouTube.
Gary Delaney-next tou.. @GaryDelaney
114K Followers 2K Following One-liner comic. New tour Gary in Punderland on sale. Joke book 'Pundamentalist' out too. Jokes tweeted aren’t in the live shows. First 2 tours now on YouTube.
Alex Horne @AlexHorne
375K Followers 1K Following Will tell you about things I do here: Taskmaster Universe, Horne Section nonsense, occasional other stuff.
Mortimer & Whitehouse.. @MWGoneFishing
142K Followers 1K Following Twitter home for Mortimer & Whitehouse: Gone Fishing. Series 1 - 6 available on BBC iPlayer. #gonefishing @ted_gonefishing on Insta!
Danny Wallace @dannywallace
196K Followers 1K Following Coming to Nottingham, Brighton, Bath, Hay and many more soon https://t.co/hlXpS3nTiE
Les Dennis @LesDennis
136K Followers 1K Following Never had a proper job. . Agent @misstoogood @toogoodmgmt https://t.co/Myp0fMUtxE
Greg Davies @gdavies
695K Followers 805 Following Full Fat Legend tour tickets available via https://t.co/3AFSyykLay, if you fancy coming
Ed Byrne @MrEdByrne
433K Followers 2K Following Stand up comedian except when on panel shows. Then, sit down comedian.
Reginald D Hunter @reginalddhunter
111K Followers 4K Following Comedian swashbuckler dabbler-scientist rapscallion poof reader shockmocker and libertine
@mrchrisaddison@dizl... @mrchrisaddison
364K Followers 2K Following Spy. Dammit! Ex-spy. “Imagine a child’s drawing of a magic leek.” - @captainward who/whom Contact: [email protected] Avi pic: @ClaraMolden. I mute killjoys.
Al Murray - DKMS.ORG... @almurray
423K Followers 2K Following Alter ego's alter ego. Culture war conchie. @britishdrumco. IC/OC: @wehavewayspod. Also: https://t.co/p3Ha7c0R1o! Contact: [email protected]
Kerry Godliman @KerryAGodliman
206K Followers 938 Following #WhitstablePearl #AfterLife #Derek #SaveMe #LiveAtTheApollo #MockTheWeek #Taskmaster #AdultMaterial #TriggerPoint #Bosh https://t.co/3o1yqOQItU
MrsZest @MrsZest
56 Followers 211 Following
peezy mullins @peezymullins
75 Followers 431 Following KC attorney specializing in healthcare and employment law and the intersection between them.Primarily on the plaintiff's side now. Also a proud mom and liberal.
Michael Calvo @MichaelCalvo_5
0 Followers 66 Following Port St. Lucie HS (FL) I| 5’6’’ 132 || QB |3.6 GPA || Class of 2028 I [email protected]
Louise Gregory @LouiseGreg9100
2 Followers 33 Following
Nicki💙 @NicolaD93239082
46 Followers 721 Following
William Main @WilliamWinch10
8 Followers 99 Following
Alasdair Scott @alasdairscott
12K Followers 12K Following Self-facilitating media node. Wannabe astronaut. Questionable Hair Choices. (portrait © Rankin, 2023)
Shurlaar Harod @aceilawoh
2 Followers 225 Following
Hewasgivingmekisses @toomaniproblems
4 Followers 31 Following
Rhiain @SaffySays
76 Followers 167 Following Internet addict, non-domestic goddess, volunteer dog walker for Cardiff Dogs' Home. Programme Director, PGCE PCET @CardiffMet_PCET @cardiffmet
Dr NO @NO86074961
7 Followers 222 Following
John Mill @Johnny_Hypno
7 Followers 15 Following Hypnotherapist, Counsellor, Master Life Coach, Author, Trainer, Director of Possibilities
myopinion @justmyopinioneh
42 Followers 321 Following Football, Food, Cooking, Music, Films, Fitness, Books, Cars, Relationships, Politics, I'll give my opinion on them all, just my opinion.
Peter @Peter3275359208
13 Followers 25 Following
The Holidays @ThickerWater
38 Followers 328 Following An American Mom seeks the perfect holiday season but modern science and her own secrets threaten to destroy her family. A timeless American Family story #LAthtr
Stasia Taylor @StasiaTayl76967
40 Followers 1K Following
RoastCocoPops @RoastCocopops
92 Followers 151 Following
Ziggy Heide @HeideZiggy71827
2 Followers 41 Following
Autumn @AutumnM60512
24 Followers 492 Following She/Her 🏳️⚧️ 24 My main aspiration in life is becoming hot. I swear I'm not a bot. twitter just thinks I an and won't let me change my name
bill bill @billbill275700
62 Followers 763 Following
Richard H @the_offbeatpoet
99 Followers 253 Following Y6️⃣& English Lead 📚 | Teaching 20+ yrs | Former Head for 13yrs | Love the Beatles🎵| ⚽️Bradford C | ❤️Dogs |Published Poet ✍️’A Good Title Is Hard To Find’.
Jason Beckley @jrbeckley
24 Followers 221 Following
Stuart @StuartL1990
59 Followers 261 Following
NosajCFC⭐️⭐️ @CFC8605
985 Followers 1K Following Chelsea FC - Collector of Football Shirts & Memorabilia... Football - Darts - Rally... Music - Metal, Hip-Hop, DnB... Films - Series - Comedy - Books...
Elon musk(parody) @EMusk48109
8 Followers 506 Following Who Controls The Memes, Controls The Universe - Elon Musk Parody Account • Memes
Janet Mawer @mawer_jane17456
0 Followers 8 Following
Dom Ule @dom_ule
71 Followers 224 Following German cat whisperer of French origin and at home in the UK.
Kyra hot @freelance81099
5 Followers 258 Following
Jonathan Browne @JonathanBr45497
7 Followers 123 Following
Ellen Harrison (Guy) @Ellen_Guy
321 Followers 1K Following
Gareth Wilson @garywilson2040
30 Followers 77 Following
Spilleroftruth @spilleroftruth
4 Followers 53 Following
ROLLER 6IX @Float2024
1 Followers 102 Following Five piece indie rock band from Halifax, West Yorkshire, UK. First formed in 2001. Back in 2024.
randombarking @randombarking
88 Followers 554 Following Steve & Monique post our views and observations from the middle of the Canadian Prairies.
rob williams @robwilliams17
56 Followers 98 Following Husband, dad, Christian, primary school teacher
Steve @MisterS008
0 Followers 2 Following
Gary Patrick Lukas @hickslv426
737 Followers 2K Following A Scotsman who lived in New York. Celtic FC fan, Animal lover, Photographer, Hobby writer, 80s Movies & Music lover, Horror fan, Top Gun, Roadhouse, Aliens
Marc Micklewright @Marcmick65
22 Followers 164 Following
Hicksy_21 @21Hicksy
1 Followers 213 Following
Paul Myles @MylesPdmyles
36 Followers 250 Following
Alayah Mario @alayah95846
27 Followers 423 Following
Everlee Titus @EverleeTit88640
31 Followers 374 Following
Danny Baker @prodnose
504K Followers 2K Following Prodnose: The Treehouse Podcast & A Thousand Fresh Delights. Do join us: https://t.co/OLSu1uryzv All New Material, Lady...
Mark Watson @watsoncomedian
262K Followers 4K Following ‘One of the most genuinely joyous presences in comedy’ - The Times. Tour dates and book details on website. Personal messages https://t.co/4P0kjAp17O
Milton Jones @themiltonjones
384K Followers 387 Following 2024 Tour HA!MILTON on sale now! https://t.co/d3sOZ748va Hee/Hee rep: [email protected] voices: [email protected]
Alex Horne @AlexHorne
375K Followers 1K Following Will tell you about things I do here: Taskmaster Universe, Horne Section nonsense, occasional other stuff.
Danny Wallace @dannywallace
196K Followers 1K Following Coming to Nottingham, Brighton, Bath, Hay and many more soon https://t.co/hlXpS3nTiE
Ed Byrne @MrEdByrne
433K Followers 2K Following Stand up comedian except when on panel shows. Then, sit down comedian.
Al Murray - DKMS.ORG... @almurray
423K Followers 2K Following Alter ego's alter ego. Culture war conchie. @britishdrumco. IC/OC: @wehavewayspod. Also: https://t.co/p3Ha7c0R1o! Contact: [email protected]
Matt Forde @mattforde
96K Followers 13K Following Comedian. Political Party, British Scandal, @RnRFootball and @downtdog host. #NFFC fan
Tommy Cannon @TheTommyCannon
39K Followers 8K Following Entertainer/Actor/Father/Husband /Half of Cannon and Ball⭐️ management: [email protected]
Mike Fenton Stevens�.. @fentonstevens
13K Followers 3K Following Actor and family man - any family will do. The Wizard in Wicked at the Victoria Apollo, London. My Time Capsule @MyTCpod podcaster
Ricky Grover @RickyGroverUK
21K Followers 1K Following Actor, comedian, dyslexic-writer, East London but now living in the Scottish Highlands #MentalHealth Patron @theaaazone Acting: @gdamanagement @thejonesesvoice
Sally Phillips @sallyephillips
85K Followers 4K Following Official account of actor Sally Phillips. Enthusiastic about Finland, seriously over having a serious side.
Sutton United FC @suttonunited
34K Followers 1K Following The official X home for Sutton United FC 🟡🟤 Match updates, news items & more. Proud members of EFL SkyBet League 2 ⚽️ #SuttonUnited | #ForeverAmber
Mark Simmons: UK Tour.. @JokesWithMark
11K Followers 2K Following UK Comic’s Comic Best Act 2022. For Tour Shows & Everything else click here: https://t.co/8MvNj2L8f8
Phil Tufnell @philtufnell
346K Followers 436 Following Ex-England spinner. BBC TMS & TV commentator. Former QofS Skipper. 'Tuffers' Tipple' wine range. NEW book Out October: https://t.co/lqjdqqcNDl
Dan Walker @mrdanwalker
799K Followers 2K Following That tall fella off the telly, President of #EggClub and, new for 2024, the bloke off @ClassicFM breakfast
BBHandTC @BigBuddyHolly1
46 Followers 30 Following Big Buddy Holly and the Croquettes are a part parody, part tribute, part-time Buddy Holly fan band. Rock and Roll with a smile and often a chuckle.
The Prince and Prince.. @KensingtonRoyal
3.0M Followers 497 Following The official account of The Prince and Princess of Wales, based at Kensington Palace.
Paul Young @PaulYoungParlez
51K Followers 448 Following Singer, band member, cooks a bit, loves all kinds of music! FB/PY: https://t.co/PRACscemvg FB/Pacaminos: https://t.co/GdVTFOzTXK
Matt Gray @MattGray25
2K Followers 489 Following Former Manager @Suttonunited and assistant at Eastleigh, Aldershot Town and Crawley Town. Director of @PSDCoaching.
Super7 @super7store
52K Followers 306 Following Official X of #Super7. We are a collector toy company based in the 415. No one made what we wanted. So we made it ourselves.
Virgin Media 🐐 @virginmedia
376K Followers 435 Following Why stumble when you can soar?🐐 🎮💻📱❤️Part of Virgin Media O2 #SeeWhatYouCanDo
Russ Bray @Russ180
60K Followers 1K Following Professional Darts Referee: Sponsored by: Unicorn and Interwetten. My contact is: [email protected]…Also: https://t.co/fWNZqaGE3p
Andrew Pipe @twelvecaesars12
481 Followers 263 Following Guitar player with Twelve Caesars' - our single 'Ride the American Wave' is available now on Ramrock Records. x
Mike Batt LVO @Mike_Batt
23K Followers 5K Following Artist/Singer/Songwriter/Producer/Composer/Director etc. I've conducted more orchestras than you can shake a stick at. https://t.co/v3U4jeFwwV
ROBERT SMITH @RobertSmith
261K Followers 541 Following FOUNDING MEMBER OF / SONG WRITER SINGER GUITARIST IN / @THECURE
BG5 @b_goody5
493 Followers 202 Following Professional Footballer @suttonunited 💛 Represented by @worldinmotion_ ⚽️
Jentezen Franklin @Jentezen
1.0M Followers 731 Following Senior Pastor of @freechapel, New York Times Best-Selling Author, and Director of JFM Media.
Target Darts @TargetDarts
66K Followers 679 Following The leading brand in #darts. Working with the best professional players in the game, it is our mission to inspire all #dartsplayers to step beyond their limits.
Davo @davogoon
104 Followers 661 Following
Spencer Jones @spendals
16K Followers 887 Following Herbert Clunkerdunk, Mr winner, Big Babies, Ted Lasso, Upstart Crow
WAYNE MARDLE @Wayne501Mardle
174K Followers 2K Following MY VIEWS ARE MY OWN! Brand Ambassador for William Hill. Mission Darts. Legend Darts. Contact.. [email protected]
'Rapid' Ricky Evans�.. @goodevans180
36K Followers 830 Following Professional PDC Darts Player. Managed By @mdaevents
Death by Toys @danpolydoris
28K Followers 10K Following I make custom toys/collectibles/garbage for a living.
Raymond van Barneveld @Raybar180
250K Followers 4K Following 5 x World Darts Champion • Manager Ben de Kok 📬 Management: [email protected] 💻 Check out our website: https://t.co/ApByOot0ZH
Danny “The Gambler�.. @TheBaggish
10K Followers 432 Following Former pro dart player.I use the best darts 🎯out there @TargetDarts. Sponsored-by #reaperdarts. Fan of #LUFC #SF49ers #Braves #ChiBulls
Joan Armatrading @ArmatradingJoan
23K Followers 58 Following My first-ever Symphony, Symphony No.1, is available to listen to on BBC Sounds. Click on the link here.
Zoe Ball @ZoeTheBall
404K Followers 1K Following @bbcradio2 #zoeballbreakfastshow from 6.30am mon - fri 🌅 [email protected]🎙
🎶🦋Jeany🦋🎶 @jeanjeany111
2K Followers 4K Following RT is not an endorsement..No DMs Thanks.. Politically homeless 🦋😉
Gail James @witchwaylancs
738 Followers 1K Following Visually impaired, Mum Grandma Retired Nurse Carer Love Chris de Burgh Neil Taylor The illegal Eagles , Mentor for Cherished Gowns UK
Mark Mothersbaugh @mmothersbaugh
12K Followers 157 Following Conceptualist, film and TV composer, frontman and co-founder of Devo. Official account of Mark Mothersbaugh. Managed by Mark’s team.
DEVO’s Gerald V. Ca.. @Gvc3Casale
8K Followers 7K Following New Action Figure ➡️ https://t.co/ldG54dSwMl
Lantern Arts Centre @lanternarts
822 Followers 558 Following Founded 25 years ago - Arts Centre in SW20. Productions, children's theatre clubs, studio hire, costume store, film clubs, dance classes and much more...
Iain Channing @iainchanning
913 Followers 1K Following Lecturer in Criminology at the UniversPlymouth. Interested in police/crime history, public order law, political violence and extremism. https://t.co/lmo1bR7lw9
Lene Lovich Band @LeneLovichBand
2K Followers 123 Following The New Wave rock legend and her band, who drive around the world in a van playing shows and solving mysteries. All other Lene Twitters are fakes.
Katie Melua @katiemelua
39K Followers 137 Following Official Account For Katie Melua. Click https://t.co/wTFfgNMvpo for upcoming live shows.
T-Mobile Help @TMobileHelp
421K Followers 23 Following T-Force = Customer service gurus: Un-carrier fanatics: Supporting Social from 3:00 am - 9:30 pm PT. Also available here https://t.co/ljUWRtxOJq
Simon Aldridge @simonaldridge27
132 Followers 208 Following carpenter and cyclist and duathlete 🏴🇨🇦
Peter Duncan @peterduncans
5K Followers 418 Following Showrunner: https://t.co/8aZ2QSEmin Actor: https://t.co/Ot7xwNdkZf Travel: https://t.co/ETwU3v22yt
Whitney Kumar @whitneykumar
1K Followers 1K Following Court stenographer to Judge Judy Sheindlin on @JudyJustice ⚖️ New episodes weekdays on @imdbtv 📺 I've got the receipts ✍️
Judy Justice @JudyJustice
126K Followers 8 Following New cases. New team. Our same favorite judge. New season of #JudyJustice premieres on 1/22! Stream on @AmazonFreevee or @PrimeVideo!
hamilton @hamiltonuk
10K Followers 470 Following Next Generation Records ➖Blatant Beats➖Stimulant Records➖Ram Records➖Tidy Trax
Chinese Elvis @chineseelvis
364 Followers 690 Following The King from Beijing. First Elvis in Doctor Who. Thangyuveramuch...
Emma Raducanu @EmmaRaducanu
639K Followers 13 Following london|toronto|shenyang|bucharest insta:emmaraducanu
Well done lads
You'd think these lads were bad news wouldn't you? Actually, they call themselves "Rubbish Robbers" and go around Redruth cleaning the streets, bushes, parks, and town center, when nobody is watching. How ace are they?
@RealTimVine Joe Strummer once asked a few of us to choose the best material for his new curtains and then have a vote to decide which one to go with. I thought velour and velour won!
Those joyous Coventry celebrations taken away…for this?
@RealTimVine I’m following the 2 blokes talking, I’m a commentary supporter.
Remembering Victoria Wood: Acorn Antiques From the first series of Victoria Wood: As Seen On TV, from 1985. The best soap ever! 😂More technical mishaps ensue including Berta sitting in a visibly awkward position! Brilliant. Comedy genius! R.I.P. Victoria Wood 1953-2016
@RealTimVine That’s a good little boost for my morning! Glad to be of service. 🎶
@RealTimVine A trigger! One of my songs is a trigger! I hope it makes you happy, Tim, that feeling of being about to go on stage. 👍🥳
@RealTimVine the reference to cannabis immediately caught my eye, but on 2nd glance it actually says 'filing cabinets'
@RealTimVine Knowing what a fan you are of watching nuthatches...
I will have to charge for this vandalism .... some potential tenants of this furnished apartment have taken a dislike to some of the decorations. Instead of letting me know, they decided to remove it themselves! 😱😯 #GwylltHollow
@RealTimVine We've measured this door handle at 1 lobster
Let’s build a LEGO ring for Parker v Joshua 2 @anthonyjoshua 🥊 🎥🎞️: @kerryrusselltv
@RealTimVine Conditioner Gordon would be a great pun if it was part of a BatMan hair care range. But it isn't. Ta.
Just caught the wife trying to sign a cheque… Did she learn nothing from @RealTimVine
𝗙𝗨𝗟𝗟-𝗧𝗜𝗠𝗘 | 1-2 Another MASSIVE result on the road. 👊 A superb performance delivers 3 wins on the spin! ✅ Good Friday U's! Safe travels home Amber Army. 💛 #SuttonUnited
Rutland Weekend Television. The Old Gay Whistle Test Eric Idle as Bob Harris, catches up with Toad the Wet Sprocket.
Great show last night @RealTimVine & @TheArchini . You had us howling. If you've got some spare time, feel free to come in and see us today. You can bring Fmqpa!🐶🤣
Great show by @RealTimVine and @TheArchini in Liverpool last night. Went home with a stomach ache from laughing so much!
@TheArchini @RealTimVine thanks both for an amazing night at the @LivEveryPlay last night it was fantastic me and the family loved it
@RealTimVine I'm in the States waiting for this DVD. Hope you have a good show. Break an antler 🫎
Trends for United States
52,1 B posts
14,9 B posts
7.302 posts
29,4 B posts
19,9 B posts
34,1 B posts
6.448 posts
20,4 B posts
1.811 posts
11,5 B posts
25,6 B posts
203 B posts
114 B posts
5.363 posts
5.788 posts
20,2 B posts
1.967 posts
10,3 B posts
You might like
bob mortimer
@RealBobMortimer
1.2M Followers
Greg Davies
@gdavies
695K Followers
Richard Osman
@richardosman
1.3M Followers
Dara Ó Briain
@daraobriain
2.6M Followers
Charlie Brooker
@charltonbrooker
1.2M Followers
Joe Lycett
@joelycett
1.4M Followers
David Mitchell
@RealDMitchell
2.3M Followers
Bill Bailey
@BillBailey
3.4M Followers
Victoria Coren Mitche..
@VictoriaCoren
707K Followers
Susie Dent
@susie_dent
1.1M Followers
Rob Beckett
@robbeckettcomic
588K Followers
Sara Pascoe
@sarapascoe
361K Followers
Aisling Bea
@WeeMissBea
554K Followers
Have I Got News For Y..
@haveigotnews
1.1M Followers
Rob Brydon
@RobBrydon
2.1M Followers