Lord Flashheart @Lordflashh3art
‘Chavtastic debt enthusiast’ with a beautiful boy & girl, patient wife and a healthy distaste for our current politicians. Steak | Rants | Gratuitous Porschery England, United Kingdom Joined May 2009-
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After an onslaught of in laws, leftie Aunts, finicky Dad’s, drunken friends and trips away, I finally have a completely free weekend 🥳🥳 It shall consist of a takeaway tonight, gym tomorrow morning, surf and turf Saturday night and a slow roasted leg of roast lamb for Sunday…
This morning, I took my dressing gown off of the towel rail, put it on and actually said out loud to myself ‘Mmm, it’s like a big warm hug’. Then I paused in horror and just looked at myself in the mirror in silent disgust. I need to give up vaping ASAP 🥴😩🌈
I love stupid things that make me laugh against my will 🤣🤣 Thankfully, so does my wife 🥴🤣
I love stupid things that make me laugh against my will 🤣🤣 Thankfully, so does my wife 🥴🤣
Sir, you look like a jacket potato rolled in toxic waste and pubic hair 🥴🤦🏻♂️ Keep at least 500 metres away from schools, nurseries, children and actual lesbians at all times and we won’t have a problem👌🤡
For tonight’s dinner, I whipped up a garlic chilli chicken, lamb and king prawn Saag Balti finished with a drizzle of single cream, flaked almonds and chopped coriander 🍛😋 Sadly, it was served with a shop bought garlic and coriander mini naan which tasted like Angela Rayner’s…
Happy St. George’s Day, my fellow extreme far-right fascist patriots! 🏴🏴🏴
Well, that’s the best thing I’ve ever seen 🤣🤣👏
Well, that’s the best thing I’ve ever seen 🤣🤣👏
Wedding anniversary tomorrow and true to form, I completely forgot to buy a card, flowers and a present 😬😩🤦🏻♂️ Thankfully Amazon have got me covered with next day delivery… all I have to do now is figure out how to last 10 bastarding hours in bed until they bloody arrive 🥴🥲🤣
Little man back in nursery, Alice asleep in the pram and not back in work until Wednesday so nipped out for a swift half with wife! 😋🍻 Had worse Monday’s tbf 🤷🏻♂️😃 Hope your day is treating you alright too 😎🫡
My good friend @BritishBull78 asked a favour of me last week. He had caught an unfair ban and asked that I let people know of his unfortunate, desperately sad and unjust situation. Alas, being a self centred, juggernaut egotist of epic proportions, I promptly forgot 😮💨👀 Might…
Those fillet steaks I had from the local butcher on our mini break were so damn good, I had to buy four more on our way home 🤷🏻♂️🥩 Sunday lunch was kicked firmly into touch; I couldn’t go another week without having making the meal we had for our lad’s birthday again: - Fillet…
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@Lordflashh3art Sounds wonderful. We were looking forward to similar but have now been dumped with grandchild No1 because his dad can't be arsed. It never seems to end
@Lordflashh3art Doesn't look like a problem to me. In fact, they all look delicious.
@Lordflashh3art Definitely no problem xxx Better than master chef xxx
Who is the character you're slowly turning into?
Who is the character you’re slowly turning into?
@brightsider123 @jk_rowling Have you watched the video?
@Lordflashh3art Better to have OCD than CJD after all that Beef !🤣👍
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@g_lamarche @veritasalways1 I'm not reading all of that, Mary. Do you have a favourite cheese?
@Lordflashh3art Steak almost everyday for me 😋You pictures put my cooking skills to shame 😳
Home 🥰 Thank you for everyone's kind words and well wishes. Mother and baby are doing so well.
Anyone remember Special Brew? Have just been sent 4yr old me... Would explain a lot 🤣😬
@Lordflashh3art Are you mooing at night??? Do you have a craving for milky drinks??? Do you find yourself hanging around fields with cows in them??? No? Well, I wouldn't worry, pet.
@Lordflashh3art @campbellclaret It’s the “checking out for size” part of this. As if anyone bothers checking him? Everyone knows he’s the biggest prick there is.
@Lordflashh3art Me too, different pics different problem, still involves flesh 😅
@Lordflashh3art Change your name. Lord Flashfried. Easy peasy.
@Lordflashh3art Busy decorating the lounge with my other half. Out for a Thai tonight with friends and a roast chicken with trimmings tomorrow. Have a good one 🤗🤗
@Lordflashh3art Sounds idyllic Flash …. Enjoy 😊 🍷 🐑
@ElCapitan_Chaos Is the blue one the Porsche Telling Volume increase button? Obligatory to ensure people know what you drive, can be replaced by branded keyring in pictures @Lordflashh3art
@Lordflashh3art surely time for a quick jaunt to Monaco soon - take the Yacht out for a spin back for dinner in the Harbour ….maybe for the GrandPrix?
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