Ian kerr @praiseallah420
mcdonald apple pie and big mac and sprite Kaysville, UT Joined August 2017-
Tweets154
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Followers21
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Following28
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Likes43
it is our responsibility, nay, our duty to separate grift from the grifter
my political beliefs are that of the nearest suitable mate
happy to say prostate cancer finished the job that the LAPD couldn’t 🙏
hoping punxsutawney phil gets turned into a pelt for lying
when your card declines at the shrimp fried rice factory they make you face the shrimp
when your card gets declined at the duty free and.. uh… they put the duty back in (??) i don’t know how this works
eating a dangerous amount of pasta since gaining my own kitchen
cheetos in my cabinet are calling to me like the green goblin mask
hey bro you might miss that shot. might as well not take it.
i put my schrödinger in her box till that kitty dead
Imagine ur card declines at the hookah lounge and they delete your snapchat stories
my twelve step plan is 6 beers and then 6 more beers
i can’t wait till i’m older so i can say shit like “to what do i owe the pleasure”
running 2.5 miles fueled by nothing but sweedish fish and artisan water
when she’s laughing a little too hard at laser maestros jokes
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thank you for this @dril
1.8M Followers 425 Following My posts help mentally ill peoples brains. I want to do good. I Want to bring value to this platform. That is my Quest. My Dream
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Imagine ur card declines at the hookah lounge and they delete your snapchat stories
56 minutes into 2024 and bad things already happening to the people who wronged me in 2023 god bless
I’m not studying for my finals. I’ll be in the gym getting up shots so I can play in them
I just thought about Henry Kissinger throwing it off the glass to Kobe to win the Hell Finals and got chills
The 19-year-olds who attend my favorite university didn’t score enough touchdowns today so I’m blacked out, facedown in the driveway. My wife is crying, begging me to come inside & sing Happy Birthday to my son. “Please just reverse the Rav4” I whisper into the concrete.
The college student seems to ride the train at night (at at at night)
I’m going to be the first white guy to gentrify O-Block
Anyone else think A24 is lowkey Marvel movies for people with mood disorders?
Just slammed by forehead on a door frame (average door frame in the United States is 6’7”) and tripped over my pair of red october air Yeezy’s (average price of $20,000) worst day ever
its that time of year i say "Hlaloween? Everyday is halloween, in our life. We all wear a mask" and get 300 death threats for being Truthful
when my enemies go low...... i Suck their DICK !!
Dude there’s no way you built this city on rock and roll
If I was Kurt Cobain I would’ve shot some hoops instead of myself
Although I’m a jock I secretly enjoy sensitive music like phoebe bridgers
Ferrari trailer and Napoleon trailer playing back to back before Killers of the Flower Moon
*in china* wow, it’s incredible that your child knows how to speak chinese at this age
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