Cormac McCarthy (parody) @CormacMcCrthy
My publicist insists this parody is a worthwhile use of my remaining time. Says parody makes good metrics. Parody. tinyurl.com/Cormac-McCarth… United States Joined September 2018-
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Followers39K
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A gas station man wandering around with a plastic bag tried to sell me brand new jeans at the pump. Now he's jaywalking across a six lane boulevard As he stumbles past an F-150 I stare in awe and try to conjure the daisy chain of thoughts which lead from "I have a plastic bag…
Never cared for line dancing. Always struck me as vaguely fascist. Makes me feel like I'm in the presence of incompetent Gestapo.
I knew O.J. Simpson before the dark times. Which is what I call the part of the 1990s when everyone wore plaid We ate hamburgers at a fat burger in Silverlake with Kato. Rain dripped through a hole in the roof and the meat was burnt and Kato picked at his ear with a finger…
I remember the eclipse of 1970 Woke from my whiskey nap to the darkened sky. Grabbed the 35mm and looked up No sun Kept searching. Sky still dark. Still no sun. How long do eclipses last? Checked my watch. Half past 9 In the evening. Damn whiskey. Overslept by 7 hours
Why do ice cream trucks play the Entertainer How did that become the anthem of frozen treats
I eat burnt toast and scowl at my publicist. Eighth day in a row he's worn this ill-fitting houndstooth suit. He thinks we don't notice Oh we notice For Terry, every day is a fool's day
Last night the nurse left the television on and I don't know how to turn it off. Consequently I fell asleep unwillingly watching Planet of the Apes I dreamed it was real: the apes had become sentient and were taking over the world. Except they were tiny. Reduced to the size of…
Joe Lieberman used to phone me on Friday mornings. In the cool dim neverlight of the morning Lieberman's drawl carries over the miles of vacant american desert, traversing Bell's wires like those guys in my books about horses and murder. Check the machine, Cormac. I won't hear…
The city converted the library into a postmodern monument to nonsense A municipal library doesnt need a freestanding faux fireplace in its magazine section. Nor a Starbucks where the encyclopedia used to be I complained but the clerk said I had to send an email Is this email
I use Facebook to disparage millennials and yell at my publicist These are unfit for my purposes
I use Facebook to disparage millennials and yell at my publicist These are unfit for my purposes
Case in point is a phrase used to describe an illustrative example of something Case AND point is used to reveal the person using it is an idiot
I met Toby Keith only once. He sauntered up to me in 2003 at a hoedown, which is what you call a barbecue when you live in the South and voted for Pat Buchanan more than once. I called it a barbecue but everyone else there called it a hoedown. My publicist dragged me there to…
Blood Meridian @BloodMeridianQT
6K Followers 178 Following Nonsequential quotes from ‘Blood Meridian or The Evening Redness in the West’ by Cormac McCarthy, 1985 // Header: “The Phantom Cart”, Salvador Dalí, 1933
Laurel Hightower @HightowerLaurel
11K Followers 4K Following kinda bad about notifications. Author of CROSSROADS, SILENT KEY, BELOW and EVERY WOMAN KNOWS THIS. she/her. Media rep: @spinablackyarn Lit rep: @BeckyLeJeune
Philip Fracassi @PhilipFracassi
6K Followers 1K Following THE THIRD RULE OF TIME TRAVEL (2025) SARAFINA (Fall '24) NO ONE IS SAFE! (OUT NOW!) BOYS IN THE VALLEY GOTHIC A CHILD ALONE WITH STRANGERS Rep: @elizcopps
Russ Ramsey 🫀 @russramsey
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4K Followers 880 Following George. Explorer of used bookstores. Supporter of indie authors. Recently voted Most Likely To Be Found Rooting Through Paul Tremblay’s Trash. He/Him
Katherine Silva💀 P.. @KatherineSilva_
3K Followers 3K Following Maine grief horror author. Coffee lover. Victim of cat antics. 🏳️🌈 THE WILD FALL '23 | UNDEAD FOLK May 2024. HWA/NEHW. Editor @Strange_Wilds_P. she/her
Brennan LaFaro - Demo.. @BrennanLaFaro
3K Followers 1K Following Author/writer/wordslinger. SLATTERY FALLS TRILOGY🏚️ BUZZARD’S EDGE SAGA 🤠 LAST STAY 🪓 ILLUSIONS OF ISOLATION 👻. He/Him.
S.K. Edman, Stout Gir.. @SherriKEdman
906 Followers 2K Following If you don’t like my tweets, complain to @pledman. 6 kids. Philadelphia homeschoolers. @messiahanglican @the_adlw Opinions are all mine, poor things. 🦅🦅🦅
C. J. Bow @C_J_Bow
1K Followers 1K Following That reader/writer guy you might know with some stuff you might've read. Bow not Box not 🤖. I'm a gd animal. (He/Him)
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stacela @stacela
228 Followers 169 Following 𝓵𝓪 𝓿𝓲𝓮 𝓮𝓼𝓽 𝓫𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓮 🇺🇸 🇮🇱 Am Yisrael Chai. “The thing about smart people is that they seem like crazy people to dumb people.” - Stephen Hawking
JD'oh @JDoh2983
2K Followers 5K Following brutally honest, Misfit Toy thats bout peace & love. Change lives 4 tha better ❤ weird, controversial & horror films, a noob tho - follow back not required 🙂
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Grandpa Ty @Big_Tyree_Is_Me
147 Followers 309 Following GOOOOO BRAVES ⚾️⚾️⚾️ #UGA, #Auburn, #SEC, #NCAA sports, and #CollegeFootball. #UNC #Tarheels and #Duke basketball is ok.
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🪻 may queen überm.. @sissyfistt
15 Followers 101 Following when you look into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you - nietzche 🍒
Carolyn L. Davis @CarolynLDavisME
465 Followers 697 Following Devotee of all things natural gas-related, aided and abetted by very good dogs. All opinions are my own. 🇺🇦
deede gee ⚖️ @deede_g23
2K Followers 2K Following Crime is contagious. If the gov’t becomes a lawbreaker, it breeds contempt for law; it invites every man to become a law unto himself; it invites anarchy - LB
ASTRAL GAMER @oooo0o0o0ooooo
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j @jiovanni_ortiz
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Projeto Notorious @Notorious962
0 Followers 256 Following Invicto no Tinder (23-0). Autor de “Porsche Clube”. Por pouco não me tornei Hall da Fama, mas de qualquer forma sou lendário. #Notorious #PorTheNotorious ✊🏻
Weird OJ Simpson story.
I knew O.J. Simpson before the dark times. Which is what I call the part of the 1990s when everyone wore plaid We ate hamburgers at a fat burger in Silverlake with Kato. Rain dripped through a hole in the roof and the meat was burnt and Kato picked at his ear with a finger…
Happy April Terry's Day
I eat burnt toast and scowl at my publicist. Eighth day in a row he's worn this ill-fitting houndstooth suit. He thinks we don't notice Oh we notice For Terry, every day is a fool's day
@CormacMcCrthy Not every walrus is the same walrus.
Cool story about Toby Keith
I met Toby Keith only once. He sauntered up to me in 2003 at a hoedown, which is what you call a barbecue when you live in the South and voted for Pat Buchanan more than once. I called it a barbecue but everyone else there called it a hoedown. My publicist dragged me there to…
@weatherchannel @bmsnews x.com/cormacmccrthy/…
On a harrowing Spirit Airlines flight I met a steward named Raheem. He took umbrage at the term steward. Thenceforth I summoned him by annihilating the call button with my cane and screaming flight attendant, drawing out the vowels like Andrés Cantor. He didnt care for that…
On a harrowing Spirit Airlines flight I met a steward named Raheem. He took umbrage at the term steward. Thenceforth I summoned him by annihilating the call button with my cane and screaming flight attendant, drawing out the vowels like Andrés Cantor. He didnt care for that…
@CormacMcCrthy I’m currently at a book shop at Hartsfield hoping that I look over and find the IRL account holder ranting to the proprietor in the same terms.
@CormacMcCrthy @DevinCow I bet. A tear comes to my eye for my loss.
@CormacMcCrthy Your book "The Passenger" was a horror to read. Well half of it, I tossed it. And yes, I know you're a real as @DevinCow . Still, I wanted to vent.
Do you eat twelve dozen eggs a day? Especially good at expectorating? Use antlers in all of your decorating? Then come to Lowe's! They've got an entire aisle targeting men named Gaston who want to kill the Beast
@Chris_SactoCA x.com/cormacmccrthy/…
@Runemarauder63 @othergaystoner @Chris_SactoCA Years ago I was forcibly ejected from a Radioshack because I refused to stop yelling. Thing was I couldn't hear what the clerk was saying because I am deaf due to my misspent youth, during which I spent too much time canoodling with Janis Joplin. She was a loud woman. Anyone who…
@Runemarauder63 @othergaystoner @Chris_SactoCA Years ago I was forcibly ejected from a Radioshack because I refused to stop yelling. Thing was I couldn't hear what the clerk was saying because I am deaf due to my misspent youth, during which I spent too much time canoodling with Janis Joplin. She was a loud woman. Anyone who…
@othergaystoner @Chris_SactoCA Fun fact, CA has a law that gives damages of 4,000 if there’s a violation of the ADA, plus attorneys fees. You should be able to find someone that would take it on contingency.
@CormacMcCrthy 😂😂😂😃😃😃😃👍 Im an old fogey and I still write checks… getting older is not for the faint-hearted, and neither are your books 😅😅😂😃
Cormac's commentary on CNN coverage.
Again CNN is wall to wall on an event that happens every year automatically By celestial imperative Which we knew about in advance And which changes nothing but the date on my checks No one understands checks any more anyway. That's why I dont go to the store Happy new year
I wonder if he met Sandra Day O'Connor. @CormacMcCrthy seems to know everyone.
I met Henry Kissinger in 1982 at an intellectual salon, which is what he called his dinner parties because he was an asshole Eyes drooping like that Hanna Barbera dog, Kissinger leans over the table and waves his glass to punctuate his rambling diatribes about realpolitik this,…
@3YearLetterman, this is rank President Franklin denialism.
America's national bird wouldve been a turkey if ben franklin had his way. Franklin was a man of talent squandered. He spent his vault of intellectual coin not on matters of state - as history would have you believe - but on ever more creative ways to light himself on fire.…
@CormacMcCrthy This account is one of the last remaining reasons I stay here.
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