SAM 🌟 @sachsta
Pro Oxford comma. PA Joined August 2012-
Tweets6K
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Followers103
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Following94
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Likes63K
SAM 🌟 retweeted
i’m like if a corpse was high-functioning
SAM 🌟 retweeted
shaving my entire body before I go play trivia at the dive bar
SAM 🌟 retweeted
a special place in hell? for me? that's actually really thoughtful
SAM 🌟 retweeted
Protein drink? You mean prosecco and a piece of cheese
SAM 🌟 retweeted
I’m a human being in the same way a tomato is a fruit
SAM 🌟 retweeted
hot girls are single and have no valentines
SAM 🌟 retweeted
“wHaT RaDiCaLiZeD yOu?” idk, im not a piece of shit
SAM 🌟 retweeted
Holy shit, this “American girl” ad from @senecaprojectus is amazing!!! Hard to see the letters I’m typing through the tears streaming down my face though.
SAM 🌟 retweeted
this is the week I’m having btw
My spotify wrapped this year is about to be all lawn mower yard work white sock new balance dad music
I never thought owning a house at 27 would mean fighting with my township’s “shade tree commission” would be my biggest annoyance but yet here I am 🥲
SAM 🌟 retweeted
Saturday night after you turn 27
Being a new homeowner is realizing the things you thought were expensive are actually relatively cheap and the things you thought were cheap are actually relatively expensive. I’m looking at you, door knobs and bathtub 👀
Adulthood for me is when my ideal Sunday is spent at the gym and then buying bath towels and hand soap 😌
Gonna start doing these again just to feel something
SAM 🌟 retweeted
☎️ New pep talks + jokes just dropped! Dial (717) 772-4737 for the You’ve Got a Friend in Pennsylvania Pep Talk Phone Line!
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