East Village Guy @eastvillageguy
Jaded FinTech PM | White shoes, ABC pants, and a mint puff bar | Interests include birth control and gut health NYC Joined September 2023-
Tweets2K
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Followers7K
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Following2K
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Likes4K
Everyday I see girls hotter than Sydney Sweeney on the subway
Sex is cool but have you ever made a group of black dudes laugh so hard they fell out of their chairs?
The quickest way to spend $80 in NYC is to walk outside and breathe air
Just now realizing, as I suffer at my desk, that I’m too old for Sunday funday End of an era.
Visited Stanford while I was out there too Hadn’t seen that many virgins in one place since middle school.
soldier: SIR THEYRE ATTACKING WHAT ARE YOUR ORDERS general tso: okay first of all calm down. u look famished. here try this chicken, it’s my secret recipe.
Forgive me father, for I have sinned
All I want to do is get back to NYC and my flight out of SF is delayed 3 hours 🫠
Going to dye my hair blue and join them
Lots of Asian chicks with purple hair in SF I think they’re onto something here.
“My name is Patrick Bateman. I'm 27 years old. I believe in taking care of myself and a balanced diet and rigorous exercise routine.”
“My name is Patrick Bateman. I'm 27 years old. I believe in taking care of myself and a balanced diet and rigorous exercise routine.”
Honestly idk how y’all do this 9-5 shit
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It's the season of idea lunches, group outings, and rooftop dinners/drinks. Time to make sure that sales people know what to do. Get me off the desk and out of the office.
@eastvillageguy Yeah, I was eating beans in a movie theater
hitting on someone with way fewer followers than you is a form of grooming btw
@the_P_God @BacardiCapital @eastvillageguy May I think?
@eastvillageguy Tf takes the subway guy
@BacardiCapital @flexupfirstyear @eastvillageguy Just wanted to take a swim
@eastvillageguy @the_P_God Come to printing house
@eastvillageguy im just trying to make society a better place. we were happier when le creuset discourse dominated our lives
babe wake up le creuset 2024 color guide just dropped
@eastvillageguy What a privilege it is to live in NYC
@eastvillageguy Have proudly stated this theory for over a year now. Although mine was the “Park Ave” test vs. subway, but still applies. On a given summer day (and most days for that matter), you see several women on Park more attractive than SS. Few understand this. EV WV as well
The final boss of the reply bots will be like: N U D E S O N L I N K E D I N
deleting hinge to focus on finding the loml on twitter
Brb getting 4 hours of sleep then leaving
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