Resist defining a person by the behavior you perceive. It reduces their humanity. It's unlikely the person is always "difficult" as a parent, partner, sister, spouse, community member, or friend. Instead, say, "This is a human being behaving in ways I perceive as difficult."…
The best antidote to burnout is not teaching people coping skills to handle stress. It's redesigning work to reduce stress. The cure for exhaustion is removing overwhelming demands and the norm of self-sacrifice. Healthy workplaces value well-being as much as performance.
There should be no such thing as an “unsung hero.” Great leaders illuminate the difference others make daily.
Time and attention are the fundamental ingredients of care. No words can make up for a lack of presence.
Leaders should give positive feedback with the same amount of thought, energy, and time as they give negative feedback.
Reminder: You can't "hold people accountable" if you don't first care for them. For anything you say - especially your critical feedback - to matter to someone, they must *first* believe they matter to you.
It’s impossible to develop trust without first demonstrating care.
The best leaders spend less time fixing what’s “wrong” with people and more time cultivating what’s *best* in people.
The most underrated human skill is showing up; being fully present *in* the joys, successes, struggles and failures with another human.
Two powerful questions to ask yourself at the end of each day to experience more meaning: 1. Who did I help today? 2. Who helped me today?
In transactional relationships, people only reach out when they want something from you. They use your connection to achieve their goals. In meaningful relationships, people get in touch when they think of you. Staying connected and being helpful are their goals.
The most common product of a deficient culture is a "difficult employee."
Too many leaders mistake compliance for commitment. Compliance is doing something because someone wants you to do it. Commitment is doing something because *you* want to do it. Getting people to comply is easy. Getting people to commit takes intention, skill, and work.
In a world that wants you to spend all your time trying to get attention, remember that true leadership comes from GIVING attention. #leadership
You can't "put people first." People are *always* first. Any and every result comes from people. It's inescapable. You must recognize the truth that people come first and then treat them accordingly. #leadership
“Humans are driven by two fundamental needs and two primal fears: The need to feel valued and the need to add value; and the fear of being devalued and the fear of being helpless.” – Isaac Prilleltensky, social psychologist #mattering
Giving advice isn't a sign of bad listening. Giving advice without first ensuring someone feels heard and understood is a sign of bad listening. Don't expect your voice to be significant to someone else until they first believe their voice is significant to you.
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That's what we mean when we talk about culture as the invisible leader. Zach Mercurio, author of The Invisible Leader, wrote:
In transactional relationships, people only reach out when they want something from you. They use your connection to achieve their goals. In meaningful relationships, people get in touch when they think of you. Staying connected and being helpful are their goals.
I feel seen.
The most common product of a deficient culture is a "difficult employee."
Sanojen vaikuttava voima! 🧡 @ZachMercurio Esimerkiksi nämä lauseet tekevät toisen näkyväksi: ✔️Huomasin, että... ✔️Kuulin sinun sanovan... ✔️Kirjasin ylös, että sinä... ✔️Kun viimeksi puhuimme, muistan... ✔️Olen ajatellut sitä, kun sinä... #työelämä #johtaminen #arvostus
To be seen is to be noticed, remembered, and thought about. To be seen is to be real. If attention is your scarcest resource, it's also the most meaningful gift you can give someone. #mattering
“People who make a difference do not die alone. Something dies in everyone who was affected by them.” — Daniel Kahneman
“The responsibility of a society is to reduce misery, not to increase happiness.” RIP Danny Kahneman—a paragon of intellectual integrity, humility, and curiosity tinyurl.com/nsaszumw
@ZachMercurio It’s ALL about being proactive & positive to elicit behavior CHANGE #ProblemsWithPunishment
Just accepted in @JDisorders. Now exploring the relational darker side of not mattering: Nepon,T., & Flett, GL. Interpersonal features associated with feelings of not mattering assessed with The Anti-Mattering Scale: An analysis of interpersonal closeness, connection & conflict
In business, shared values form an 'Invisible Leader', says @ZachMercurio. They hold everyone accountable and streamline decision-making. #nstxp #culture #values
In dating, most people focus on expressing themselves. But the most attractive partners express a desire to get to know you. It's good to be interesting. It's better to be interested. We gravitate toward people who want to understand us. Feeling seen is core to feeling loved.
I know it's not proper to post a link that opens an new window - however this is too long to post here. I'm hopeful you'll take a couple of minutes. @NFL @NFLnetwork @gmfb @WomensSportsFdn @_WomenLeaders @BillieJeanKing linkedin.com/posts/scott-pi…
A key to steady progress is prioritizing goals over moods. Whether you aim to get in shape, learn the guitar, or write a book, the question is not whether you feel like it today. It's who you want to become tomorrow. Enthusiasm fluctuates. Consistent action accumulates.
A math bookstore in NYC in the Flatiron district ! @MoMath1
Zach, Courtney, congrats !
Excited to announce I'm partnering with @HarvardBiz to publish my new book, "Mattering Comes First." This book is about translating the science of mattering to interpersonal skills leaders anywhere can use to ensure people around them feel valued and know how they add value.…
@ZachMercurio @HarvardBiz Congrats! Can’t wait to read it!
@ZachMercurio Mine is "so that, we can be open to a world of possibilities". It's the impact I strive for which stems from my Why.
Because = why = purpose -= “so that…”
A quality I've noticed about the most fulfilled people I've interviewed: They have a "so, that" mentality. They can visualize the impact of what they do while they're doing it. "I'm doing this task 'so that...'" "I'm exercising 'so that...' "My job exists 'so that'..."…