Satirical Saviour @SatiricSaviour
Son of myself here to bring peace, reason and humour to the world Pronouns: God/Godself Favourite bible story: The one where I kill everyone in a flood #atheist Joined April 2023-
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While Christians are busy celebrating Christ’s rising from the dead, the rest of us are enjoying another April fools day.
Anyone who has been persuaded that it is their religious duty not to question their faith has been partially disabled. - Dan Dennett
Religious faith gives people a gold plated excuse to stop thinking, and this makes it one of the greatest dangers to civilisation.
Geography seems to be the most reliable indicator of what your religious beliefs will be. This can only mean one thing... That the one true god is the god of geography!
As easter comes around another time, let's not forget the true meaning of easter and how Mary laid a holy chocolate egg bringing the saviour to our world...
So God commands, “You shall have no other gods before me." - Ex 20:3 but also states "I am the LORD, and there is no other; apart from me there is no God" - Is 45:5 So he will happily to punish you for breaking a commandment that is not possible to break?
What is the difference between the following statements: “Jesus rose from the dead” And “I believe that Jesus rose from the dead” I suspect that at most only one of these statements is true…
How can you be sure that people with tattoo's will not go to heaven? The same way you can be sure that they won't end up in Narnia. Real people don't end up in imaginary places. Only imaginary people can go to imaginary places!
Any person that lives long enough will eventually develop a cancer, and similarly, any society that exists long enough will develop religions. Now that we are finding ways to immunise against and cure cancer, there is hope that the same can be done for religion.
Religion offers easy answers to hard questions so that you don’t need to worry about thinking and can spend more time obeying. Where did we come from? God did it What will happen when I die? God will save you. What should I do with my money? Give it to God!
Religion is the original chain mail. Pass it on or you will go to hell.
Where were you when you first learnt that Donald Trump's real name was actually: Ronald McDonald Trump?
$ cat prayer.txt >/dev/null Ironically this probably does more than an actual prayer…
Religious Belief (n) The ability to be certain of things you cannot know and sure that everyone else with a different view is wrong. Synonyms: pig headed, blind, holy. Antonyms: thinking, sane, level headed, intelligent, uncertain.
“They were never really a Christian” is what believers need to tell themselves when another one leaves the faith. Otherwise they would be forced to consider the truth, there was never really a God.
It is strange that God can create a universe, and heal the sick, wants to be known but doesn’t seem able to tweet. I mean computers and the internet are a little tricky for older people, but I imagine an infinite age would create an infinite problem…
To maintain a devout following, it is key for the church to isolate and alienate its people. This minimises questions and allows the answers to be controlled. Sadly, often people can't see when they are vicim to this. What some of the ways that you have seen followers isolated?
Is it possible that God could create the whole world and everything in it by just speaking his word, but then not be able to create a bible that contained his clear and concise instructions? The human authors of the bible, and the mistakes it contains speaks volumes...
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@SatiricSaviour Love it! Get those Easter memes ready!
@SatiricSaviour So when my son says “which came first, the Jesus or the egg,” I can confidently say “the egg!” ‘Cause without the egg, Jesus would have melted? He’s going to love that yolk.
@SatiricSaviour That would make evangelicals a pyramid scheme.
@SatiricSaviour Different empire, same scam...
@SatiricSaviour He use to tweet and I loved him. @TheTweetOfGod I miss god.
The reason I forbid masturbation is not that it's a sin but that every time you do it, I have to watch.
@SatiricSaviour Lots of church social functions reducing social interactions with non-believers, encourage restricting TV/movie and music intake, promote home schooling, etc. Basically eliminating potential means of exposure to people and ideas that may trigger critical thinking and questions.
@SatiricSaviour By framing any information not “Christian” as demonic. I remember being literally afraid to read a book written by an atheist for fear it would ruin me. What I didn’t realize at the time, it was fear that it would convince me. Answer my cognitive dissonance,
@SatiricSaviour When I ask apologists that question, they explain it thusly: The Bible is both inerrant (it contains no error) and infallible (it cannot mislead the faithful reader). Therefore, those who misread it are not faithful Christians. See how simple it is! 🙄
I’m abit nervous re scans next week. Whatever revealed, I’m so proud of invaluable world 1st scientific data from my worst subtype brain cancer. Only possible because had riskier open craniotomy 1st then combi immunotherapy b4 major surgery. Next step: clinical trial 2 c if helps
@SatiricSaviour Our imaginary fantasy lovers always love us. Christians even get promise rings and wedding dresses for their fantasy lover. Each to his own.
@SatiricSaviour When you are in need, Mormon leaders tell you 1st go to your family, then to government systems (which they otherwise denigrate because it’s created by liberals), then as long as you are still paying tithing, they may help you. But first they want to delve into your finances.
@SatiricSaviour She did not consent
@SatiricSaviour A portrait of Jesus with a magic wand.
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