Indie Film Guide @IndieFilmGuide
Handy guidelines for the budding, uneducated indie filmmaker. Courtesy of Daily Contributing Writer to The Onion, @mcs212. Joined January 2010-
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Indie Film Guide retweeted
I bet a few unicorns thought they were a lock the morning of the Tri-Star logo audition.
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Indie Film Guide retweeted
I received a 389-minute standing ovation at Cannes for my interactive documentary "Cattle Prods: An Abusive Form of Control."
Indie Film Guide retweeted
On my deathbed, I'm going to look back and realize just how many different ways Ferris Bueller was edited for television.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
Tarantino's an insufferable car buyer, insisting trunk space be measured in cubic cameramen.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
If Jurassic World doesn't have a gag "No dinosaurs were harmed..." mention in the credits, the theater burns. Everything burns.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
It was a shockingly short time ago that a movie director had to publicly deny that hoverboards existed.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
"I can never read you! Are you happy? Hungry? Horny?! JUST TELL ME!" -- Kuleshov's wife.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
Man, Michael Bay's gonna totally RUIN Ninja Turtles! [Watches one one-billionth of a second of the 80s cartoon] ... Carry on.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
I think the teardrop tattoo just means they've seen Dancer in the Dark.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
John McClane mispronouncing Pomona should've been a runner. Never gets it right: Tacoma, Lymphoma. Everyone corrects him...except Bill Clay.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
Beetlejuice doesn't appear for real IN HIS OWN MOVIE until minute 47. That is the most badass shit ever.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
The Coen Bros. wrote Barton Fink during a 3-week break from Miller's Crossing, just in case you felt the least bit positive about your work.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
I've yet to see a movie that passes the Bevel Test: 1) Two bevelers 2) having a conversation 3) about something other than beveling.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
"Doc, are you saying you built a time machine but didn't know Old West whisky could ruin the fuel line?" "Who cares. This movie sucks."
Indie Film Guide retweeted
2 Live Crew's Full Metal Jacket samples were overt, but did you catch all the Barry Lyndon quotes they put in Pop That Coochie? (I count 38)
Indie Film Guide retweeted
It's 40% more efficient to summon Beetlejuice than Candyman.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
Haven't read the leaked Tarantino script yet, so nobody spoil which cereal commercial he quotes in it.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
Nothing that De Niro does in Cape Fear is as chilling as the family choosing to go see Problem Child in the theater.
Indie Film Guide retweeted
A113 is Pixar's CRM-114.
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