Jacob 🎗 @I_miss_Samuel
Brain cancer took Samuel 1/19/22. This account exists to connect with others who understand. Replies not expected. Likes are hugs. Vancouver, British Columbia Joined August 2022-
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“I have heard it said that the greatest loss of a human being can experience is the loss of a child. This is true. It doesn’t just change you, it demolishes you. The rest of your life is spent on another level.” Written by Gloria Vanderbilt ❤️
Day before school starts. Samuel would be starting Gr 10. Tears won’t stop. It hurts less often. But it doesn’t hurt less. Today it hurts.
Want to help a #grieving friend? Let them be sad. The trick is to lean into your helplessness in the face of your friend’s pain. Feel awkward and stay there anyway. It is an unfathomable relief to have a friend who will sit with you and let you feel exactly how you feel.
Woke up. Fell back asleep for only 10 minutes. Dreamt our family was whole again and Samuel was well. It was so real. When I woke from it I didn’t realize at first that it was a dream. And then tried but failed to go back to it. 💔
@nathanand @maria_sam22 My son died.
@refugeingrief From CS Lewis, A Grief Observed. So poignant but so accurately reflects what those who are bereaved are experiencing- has also helped others to understand their responses..
@alexeades1 I always wish I would’ve taken more pictures, especially videos of my Ashley to look back at. Cancer SUCKS! I am so sorry. 💔
“…deep memory of mortal dread”. Yep. From this article theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2…
I believe it’s important to understand that dying from cancer isn’t always snuggles, smoked salmon and freddos. It is also painful. If I don’t share this aspect, you won’t understand why we need paediatric palliative care. This is N, in a lot of complex pain.
Only 6 drugs have been approved in the entire history of the FDA, specifically for #ChildhoodCancer
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This puts it perfectly for me
Grief feels like when you want to go home, but you can’t.
“I have heard it said that the greatest loss of a human being can experience is the loss of a child. This is true. It doesn’t just change you, it demolishes you. The rest of your life is spent on another level.” Written by Gloria Vanderbilt ❤️
My patience is at an all time low and I feel like a coiled spring, ready to let rip. This was not me in my previous life, the one before I lost Owen. I was always so calm, collected and happy. This ‘after’ life is turning me into somebody I don’t like and I can’t stop it. #grief…
@2StefanMoore After 30 years after our 6 year old daughter's death I still have a permanent tear in the corner of my eye and an ache and wondering in my heart.🫂❤️🫂
When you lose a Child, there's a lump in your throat, you don't know whether you're going to choke to death or throw up. Your stomach is in a knot & your heart literally hurts in your chest. You look for things that can smell like them, you look through pictures hoping there's…
@I_miss_Samuel Our sons both died on January 19th. Love you and you family ❤️
This is what it was like spending time with our son’s dead body. He had cancer so there was nothing we could do to stop it. I think I’m posting this because many making/avoiding decisions right now haven’t held their child’s corpse.
@refugeingrief From CS Lewis, A Grief Observed. So poignant but so accurately reflects what those who are bereaved are experiencing- has also helped others to understand their responses..
Thinking of all the families who have an empty doorstep this week instead of a back to school doorstep photo 💔 This week always feels particularly brutal. Ben should be starting secondary school. Another milestone erased. #CCAM #ChildhoodCancerAwarenessMonth
I started using X (Twitter) shortly after my 13 year old Daughter died from brain cancer. It’s been an outlet to get my voice heard in our #ChildhoodCancer community & thankful to have made many amazing friends who encourage me to keep going. My hope is for the public to wake…
"It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone." ~ Rose Kennedy
I saw someone saying that someone else had cancer "but she never felt sorry for herself". And I'm like okay, but if she did feel sorry for herself that would be completely reasonable, it's cancer ffs. Kinda weird how people are applauded for not showing emotions? @ThanksCancer
@ThanksCancer I must admit that hearing about @LibbyMbc passing has really taken its toll on me. I did manage to message her on and off and I thought she was doing better. I'm praying for you, Libby.😢😕❤️
@AmandaHaddock Unfortunately I know x
The worst part of cancer is everything. All of it.
I asked him if he felt sad and he squeezed my hand yes. I asked him if he was sad because he was in the hospital and he squeezed my hand again. This isn’t the first time he has indicated the same. I usually don’t ask because I know I won’t like the answer.
@DefectiveBecca Squeezing hands can be such a powerful way to communicate. I am glad he felt safe enough to tell you this, even though it’s so painful to hear. Maybe sharing his sadness with you will help him feel heard, even if nothing can change.