CAPTAINSWERVYNERVES @CToddMcCormick1
HELPING GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO NICE PEOPLE. NYC Joined August 2020-
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IF RERUNS OF "KUNG FU" HAVE TAUGHT US ANYTHING, IT'S THAT THERE WERE ASSHOLES IN EVERY TOWN IN THE AMERICAN WEST.
APRIL SHOWERS BETTER BRING MAY FLOWERS. I ORDERED 2 STRIPPERS DAMMITT!
TODAY ON "HOUSE HUNTERS"....."I'M A STAY AT HOME PARAKEET MOM AND MY HUSBAND IS A FREE LANCE MIME. WE'RE WORKING WITH A BUDGET OF $1.6 MILLION DOLLARS".
"UH OH, SPAGHETTIOS" IS A HORRIBLE THING TO HEAR FROM A PLASTIC SURGEON.
"CINCO DE MAYO" IS AN OLD MEXICAN PHRASE THAT TRANSLATES TO "WHITE GIRLS MAKING BAD CHOICES".
ONE SURE INDICATOR THAT ADULTHOOD IS ON THE WAY IS WHEN THE "BIRTHDAY MONEY" GOES AWAY.
ELON MUSK TO BUY TWITTER AS DONALD TRUMP ATTEMPTS THE SNOOPY DANCE.
IN THE COMPETITIVE WORLD OF AMERICAN MOTHERHOOD, YOU CAN'T GO WRONG WITH FRESH CUT FLOWERS ON MOTHERS' DAY. "HERE, I KILLED THESE FOR YOU BECAUSE THEY'RE PRETTY".
ALL UNDERWEAR IS CROTCHLESS......EVENTUALLY.
TO MAINTAIN PRICING POWER, JETBLUE AIRLINES HAS REPLACED THE TERM "FIRST CLASS" WITH "RINGSIDE SEATING".
SARAH PALIN FEELS THAT NORTH AND SOUTH KOREA SHOULD GET ALONG HARMONIOUSLY BECAUSE THEY'RE BOTH JAPANESE.
PAUL SORVINO WAS ONLY ON "LAW AND ORDER" FOR ONE SEASON. THE WRITERS FOUND IT IMPLAUSIBLE THAT HE KEPT FINDING EGGPLANT PARMESAN AT EVERY CRIME SCENE.
I THINK THAT WHITE PEOPLE CAUSE FARMER'S MARKETS IN THE SAME WAY THAT TRAILER PARKS CAUSE TORNADOES.
ANYONE ELSE NOTICE THAT THE ROLLS ROYCE NEW CAR CONFIGURATOR SEEMS A BIT WONKY THIS MORNING?
How would YOU use YOUR Anker PowerHouse?? 🤔⚡️ ankerfast.club/3Ev0kQi #AnkerPowerHouse
IF YOU THOUGHT A LOT OF IDIOTS WERE KILLED TIPPING OVER VENDING MACHINES, WAIT UNTIL THEY START SELLING MARIJUANA IN THEM.
IF YOUR FIRST CHOICE FOR BEER IS DOS EQUIS, THAT DOESN'T MAKE YOU INTERESTING-IT MAKES YOU UNINFORMED.
WOW, WHEN MY MAID BRINGS OUT THE RECYCLING SHE REALLY LOOKS LIKE SHE HAS A DRINKING PROBLEM.
Crawmpar @crawmpar12129
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mne525jnqw @u45rrnnrmvw
4 Followers 443 Following The team offers short-term investments in cryptocurrencies. With a rigorous plan, you can earn between $500 and $5,000. Click to join TG: https://t.co/ZV2gyqTnP7
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WEEX Global, Sign Up .. @r0a1w8sze17
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28 Followers 5K Following gamer squad 🚀 hihi 🌈👾 follow my main: @x_kristinab
Anasta ❣️ @JanasenaCh38886
38 Followers 5K Following your fav 🎶 music 🎧 junkie 🎵 follow my main: @anastasiaxcutie
Aleigha Cichowski @CichowAlei
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Anasta ❣️ @titianas679900
52 Followers 5K Following your fav 🎶 music 🎧 junkie 🎵 follow my main: @anastasiaxcutie
Maude 🍧 @maudexoxx13998
51 Followers 4K Following your fav 5'2 whore 🙈 follow my main: @xMaudeHottie
Rena @rena_pundt
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Lucy Hibbets @HibbetsLu
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Barbara Morgenroth @BarbaraMor43217
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Volume.com @GetOnVolume
2K Followers 3K Following See the show, be the show! 🎤 Creators - Sign up to stream at any time, make money with tickets and earn tips. Fans - Watch or stream from anywhere 24/7.
Masterworks Broadway @SonyBroadway
6K Followers 2K Following 🎭 #SonyBroadway https://t.co/fFbczi4Exv https://t.co/zYdTVd0jfY
Ari's Take @ArisTake
29K Followers 5 Following 🎵💡 @AriHerstand • Best-seller How to Make It in the New Music Business (3rd Edition) OUT NOW • Webby winning #NewMusicBusiness pod • 6k+ ATA students
She & Him @sheandhim
68K Followers 5 Following New red & green splatter paint vinyl of ‘A Very She & Him Christmas’ is available for pre-order now
Lurvz @LurvzUs
2K Followers 4K Following To all the lurvz in the world, we wanna be sharing and giving back to the community, let us all love and be loved. Check out our bio to be updated !
Max Baker @maxbaker
21 Followers 195 Following
Rose.Pachecoq6854 @pachecoq6854
681 Followers 471 Following Athens🌗🐯24yo💝😌Click here to meet me or live cam:♀️🐚
Ted Cruz @tedcruz
6.3M Followers 5K Following Father of two, @heidiscruz's husband, fighter for liberty. Representing the great state of Texas in the U.S. Senate.
Kayleigh McEnany @kayleighmcenany
3.5M Followers 3K Following Co-host @OutnumberedFNC. Fmr. White House Press Secretary. Author of "Serenity in the Storm.” Harvard Law. Georgetown SFS.
Rand Paul @RandPaul
5.2M Followers 716 Following U.S. Senator for Kentucky | I fight for the Constitution, individual liberty and the freedoms that make this country great.
Kimberly Guilfoyle @kimguilfoyle
2.2M Followers 4K Following Mother, Sister, Proud American Latina Patriot, MAGA, Host of The Kimberly Guilfoyle Show on Rumble 🇺🇸
Mark R. Levin @marklevinshow
4.0M Followers 5 Following THIS IS THE OFFICIAL MARK LEVIN SHOW X PAGE. DOWNLOAD MY PODCAST FOR FREE https://t.co/LbO9BeMtMZ Join me at https://t.co/ARrBQZKtMb
The Police @ThePoliceBand
22K Followers 3 Following Now Tokking On The Moon! 🌙🎸 https://t.co/n484A1MV1W
K-Doll @kdollsweety
119K Followers 33K Following Just a girl who wants to bring back common sense! Joined Twitter because it’s better than talking to myself. #politicaljunkie #historynerd #booknerd
Matt - Stock Options .. @MarketMovesMatt
11K Followers 254 Following 📈10,000 students coached 🔥 Daily fire content making trading simple 👇Trade with me 7 Days Free
Tracker Network @trackernetwork
132K Followers 142 Following We love stats. Tracking leaderboards & stats of over 200 million players worldwide in all your favorite games: Fortnite, Warzone, Destiny 2, and more.
G1 @G1Official
32K Followers 33 Following The Official Twitter of G1 | Content, Culture, Competition
EVOLVE @EvolvePCs
22K Followers 213 Following #EvolveYourGame with our custom PCs for every budget. NO-CREDIT financing available! DMs are open. Email: [email protected] | https://t.co/IoOoV6maaq
Moog Synthesizers @moogmusicinc
146K Followers 278 Following hand-crafted analog synthesizers • continuing the legacy of Dr. Bob Moog
Summer Cummings @xxxsummerc
151K Followers 268 Following Adult model, Actress, Pro Domme,Award winning Exotic Dancer
Palm Beach Tan @PalmBeachTan
10K Followers 3K Following Palm Beach Tan Inc.'s Official Twitter Account. A Better Shade of You.
VSP Vision Care @VSPVisionCare
34K Followers 3K Following We’re committed to providing access to high-quality, affordable eye care and eyewear. #VSPVisionCare Advocacy = #WeAreVSP
Midas Gold Group @group_midas
481 Followers 143 Following Midas Gold Group is a veteran-owned and operated, second-generation precious metals dealer headquartered in Phoenix, AZ and local presence in Thousand Oaks, CA.
Bike.com @wwwBikecom
3K Followers 8 Following Official Twitter account of https://t.co/iOeeRLekNV. For support please visit https://t.co/iOeeRLekNV or call (877) 755-2453 (BIKE). HQ: 3700 West Royal #160, Irving TX 75063
Denago eBikes @DenagoEbikes
4K Followers 37 Following WINNER: Bicycling's 2023 E-Bike Award "best city step-thru" WINNER: 2023 Electric Bike Report "best electric bikes for seniors" Share your ride with #Denago.
Skies Magazine @SkiesMag
7K Followers 484 Following We are no longer updating this account. Find the latest aviation news at https://t.co/v7N7XJEpPA
JohnGalt 🇺🇸🇮.. @JohnJGaltrules
27K Followers 26K Following Leftists are fascists, make no mistake.They must be defeated. Army combat vet. (de oppresso liber) proud Israel supporter 🇺🇸🇮🇱 ✝️ ✡. #KAG
Alex MacGregor @alexmacgregor__
5K Followers 6K Following I have no idea what I'm doing. Co-host https://t.co/6OaOfinyjZ.
Chelsea Pereira @ChelseaPereira_
46K Followers 756 Following When life gives me lemons, I make chicken picatta. 🍋 Model 📸 Cook 👩🏻🍳 Interior Designer
t.j. miller @nottjmiller
273K Followers 925 Following Comedian. Died in 2010 of an AVM. The “MOSTLY EUROPE WORLD TOUR” begins May 10th in Paris- tickets on my website. Have you seen Gorburger? Look it up.
Adam Carolla @adamcarolla
803K Followers 412 Following Host of the @AdamCarollaShow on @PodcastOne. Three time @NYTimes best selling author.
Doug Benson @DougBenson
721K Followers 710 Following Free podcasts: @DougLovesMovies & @WIDEWORLD0DOUGS GDWH on Patreon for only $4.20/month. https://t.co/h5TSWUbCfz https://t.co/mFxyG8qFq1 for tour dates
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Visit Mountaineer Cou.. @VisitMtnrCtry
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jason alexander @IJasonAlexander
724K Followers 321 Following Kindness, decency, humanity, empathy, curiosity and the desire to laugh just a little bit - let’s try for those and see if we make the world a little better
Colin Mochrie @colinmochrie
402K Followers 1K Following the real Colin Mochrie. accept no substitutes.
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WashingtonPATourism @Visit_Wash_PA
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I just got more details on the GOP plans to decimate Joe Biden's Ministry of Truth. They are not just going for "defunding," this is an all-out war footing. Impeachments, congressional hearings, public humiliation of people behind it, harsh laws AGAINST this ever happening again
🚨 BREAKING: Republican Members of Congress tell me that legislation is being drafted as we speak to Defund the Joe Biden Ministry of Truth. The backlash is here. GOP Leadership better get on board.
If you spent the weeks before the 2020 election spreading and ratifying the CIA lie that the Biden family emails were "Russian disinformation," and then never apologized or retracted it, you have *zero* credibility to lament "disinformation." You are a disinformation agent.
Tell me you get this and we can be friends.
And now, without further ado, I give you Mandy Patinkin macking on a horse.
Listen to this 😂 He’s in lala land.
Makes you wonder, is there *any* level of clear cognitive decline that Democrats would agree is too much for a sitting president of their party? What would that be, if we are not already there?
I know i'm not perfect but my heart is full of love and happiness ❤🌸
@Jim_Jordan Thank you Jim Jordan.we need more people like you for getting the truth out ..
Got this sweet girl yesterday evening. Named her Maggie. This is my wife and I’s first Australian Shepherd. Wish me luck on the potty training!
I hope that even my worst critics remain on Twitter, because that is what free speech means
Thanks to new ownership, I’ve decided to come back! 😊
Live shots of Twitter headquarters this morning with top headline news around the world announcing Elon may purchase Twitter.
MMA fighter confronted by guys in a parking garage The Joe Rogan Experience Episode 1808 - Dan Soder @DanSoder @joerogan Listen Here: spoti.fi/3EHPdU5
Yeah the Trumps were really trash, guys, really just gauche awful people. Nailed that one, libs
I’ve been holding this position for over 20 minutes and I have no intention of letting go
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