A lot of women and girls simply do not know their past or current relationships are or were abusive because the general public is so misinformed about what abuse is. I regularly hear and read words like “toxic” to describe what is actually abusive.
The distinction is important for several reasons. One, abuse is a crime. “Toxic” doesn’t necessarily mean there was a victim and a perpetrator. In abusive relationships, one party is harming the other via power and control. There’s no shared blame. One party is the abuser.
@kattenbarge Not to be 'that guy' ... but how does a male realize he may be in a toxic or abusive relationship, either as a perpetrator or a victim? I feel when you focus the framing on always gender specific roles in abusive relationships it puts men automatically on the defense.
@kattenbarge I've been told on many occasions "he doesn't hit you, you aren't abused." Abuse seems to still equate to violence and not coercion and control tactics and verbal abuse.