trader joe @jimmysjawnson
drip severe Joined November 2023-
Tweets500
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Followers17
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Following23
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Likes328
scrolling through my twitter feed be like “aw cute puppy” then bam execution video
need a candle that is crafted with enzymes that help eliminate fart stank, not smoke
shoutout spell check for making me seem sober when in reality i’m typing like “mfhdjays widjdby lakers”
gotta stop swearing my bets are gonna hit when i’m hammered af
pov my gf is at the wheel and just dropped her vape between the seat and console
heroin assisted treatment can't be effective there's j no way
just got back from clash royale camp and it’s safe to say my opps are cooked
free balling it in harris teeter in board shorts for the love of the game
forced to watch real housewives of beverly hills and it actually pissed me off so badly. these ppl are actually insufferable
threw a drunk temper tantrum (electronically) because people think i’m a free vape giveaway
twitter comment section beginning to look more like the insta comment section. slowly but surely. the world is healing
could not be more down bad at the workplace rn. idk why I made the conscious decision to cover a shift
don’t mind me, just sucking the freeze dried strawberry from the teet that is my pink drink
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Certified Gas Passer @fartdoublejump
14 Followers 15 Following So you jump once normally, then before you land, you fart, and this propels you into the air again. Thank me later.
Schlond Poofa @KateyPolovin
40 Followers 72 Following when he fuck me good i take his ass to red lobster
Jian Yang @crosswalktheory
82 Followers 85 Following Notorious hater of jimmy kimmel and jj mccarthy. Casual enjoyer of HBO Max’s “Young Sheldon”
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98 Followers 120 Following existentialist, chronically unhappy, devout to onions; 6’9 btw, 377 lbs (?) kg. occasional focaccia enjoyer.
Wonder Boy @wetsocks34
117 Followers 207 Following KINGS BACK 👑 717 #TTP 🫣 the boys in the 🕳️ Environmentalist 🦹🏽♂️ Always Wet 🌊 Stay Toxic ☣️ Constantly Inebriated 💅🏾 Male Manipulator 😏 Feminist CHA
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Certified Gas Passer @fartdoublejump
14 Followers 15 Following So you jump once normally, then before you land, you fart, and this propels you into the air again. Thank me later.
𐕣 @kencarson
369K Followers 18 Following
Criminal Posts @crim_tweets_
1.0M Followers 0 Following sources for twitters most criminal tweets | turn post notifications on
Jian Yang @crosswalktheory
82 Followers 85 Following Notorious hater of jimmy kimmel and jj mccarthy. Casual enjoyer of HBO Max’s “Young Sheldon”
Ryan Logan @RyanLog03741105
7 Followers 20 Following
Wonder Boy @wetsocks34
117 Followers 207 Following KINGS BACK 👑 717 #TTP 🫣 the boys in the 🕳️ Environmentalist 🦹🏽♂️ Always Wet 🌊 Stay Toxic ☣️ Constantly Inebriated 💅🏾 Male Manipulator 😏 Feminist CHA
Etherium.lug @OgPJohnson89
118 Followers 139 Following Touch Grass + Seek Ass + Seek a job application + Seek Help
Mistah Soprano @SkinnyGuinea33
98 Followers 120 Following existentialist, chronically unhappy, devout to onions; 6’9 btw, 377 lbs (?) kg. occasional focaccia enjoyer.
hoodzilla @hoodzillaa
23 Followers 32 Following
5. Locked in/Diamonds (Personal favorite) (Snippet)
4. Bring yo friends/Rover (Car ride) (Snippet)
Do esports players get drug tested? Like could I just pop in an addy and go crazy
Waterrrrr
Roger Goodell to Jamaal Charles during the NFL Draft
For whoever needs to hear it, red gatorade and tequila do not mix well
The NFL is so wrong for sending Jamaal Charles up there knowing he can’t read 😭
u ever tar and feather a guy and realize ur out of feathers so u just give it to him straight and say listen buddy. gonna be mostly tar today
I cry every time I jerk off. I’d like to see these liberal snowflakes try and explain that one.
Me about to take a bowl and 3 shots before going to do service with the kids. #taus
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