Last year, my daughter got cut from her 7th grade volleyball team. She made the first cut, and thought she had a good chance. But on the second and final cut, they called her name, and she put her head down and walked out to the car where her mom and I were waiting. She opened the car door, sat down, and started bawling. It was so hard to watch. She wanted to be on that team more than anything. I thought she was good enough, but the coach didn't. My heart went out to her. But we didn't sugarcoat things for her. We told her we understood how much it stings. I've been cut before. Her mom had been cut from sports before, too. It's an ego shot and a gut punch. We told her to go ask the coach what she could work on for next year. The coach gave her good feedback. And told her she was the "first girl cut". Which sounded promising, but only added to the sting. She said to me, "If only I had been a little bit better and made a few more serves..." We told her she had a few choices. She could let this be the end. Or she could use this as fuel and fire. And to use it as motivation to work hard to make the team next year. For a solid year, she practiced 4-5 times per week minimum. She went to every camp, every practice session she could find, found a travel team she could play on, and spent her entire summer at camps, practices, or in our backyard smashing the volleyball against our house (and denting our siding lol). She had her tryouts this week. In the first tryout, she unleashed her new jump serve and hit 20 straight volleyballs over the net. The coaches were stunned. She said all the coaches came up to her immediately in the first 5 minutes with their clipboards and said, "What's your name?" They started using her as a demonstrator, saying "Hey, Brooklyn, can you show everyone how to do this?" Even over the returning starters. I asked her how she did when she got back. "Hey, you've been around a lot of volleyball in the last year. How did you do? Were you in the upper half of the players?" She's a humble girl. And she proudly said, "I was the best player on the court." She made the team, obviously. I'm beaming as a father this week. I told her how proud I was of her. But not just because she made the team, or she's a great player now. But because she didn't give up. She didn't cry about it (after that first day). She didn't ask mom and dad to go lobby for her to be on the team. She got after it and worked hard for a full year, taking no breaks. Her other volleyball friends were for sure taking it easier. Chilling out and vibing during the summer. She was attending camps and practicing and getting better while they were relaxing. Sometimes as a parent, you hope you're teaching your kids how to do things. But this was a case where she taught me how to do things. 100%.
I'm overwhelmed by all the responses here. This resonated with a lot of parents. I will show Brooklyn all the love. And there's a lot of stories in the replies about kids who got cut in middle school who went on to play in college... I'll show those to her for sure! Onwards!
@anymanfitness @courtllong What kind of a school is cutting seventh graders? Is this a public school? We don’t have any type of cutting at that level in middle school. They might not play a lot and ride the bench if they’re not that good, but they don’t cut them. Even at the high school level we don’t.
@anymanfitness @LeeSmithDC It also resonates with this semi-retired HS coach. Coaches should try to give positive feedback when cutting. It’s rare to see a young athlete take feedback and turn it into a positive, but it happens. Those are the best stories. Congrats on teaching your daughter a life lesson.
@anymanfitness What you taught her is much more important and longer lasting than volleyball. Congratulations, you’re doing a great job! I had a similar issue with my daughter, (academic), and what she learned from that have propelled her far beyond anything else I could have taught her.
@anymanfitness This should be shared by many. I have two teens and we often talk about hard work. Hats off to your daughter!
@anymanfitness Best thing that happened to me was being cut in hockey my sophomore year. Got brought up that year but the 3 weeks on JV changed my life even today.