Love Letters to EPCOT @ToEpcot
A letter a day while I’m kept away. Lover of EPCOT. Doing my best to keep my sanity in these dark times. Sort of a parody account. Currently in exile Joined March 2020-
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Dear EPCOT You can take my temperature I’ll complete a questionnaire You can take a nasal swab I’ll wear a mask I’ll bring my own sanitizer I’ll remain 6 feet away from everyone I’ll sign a waiver saying I entered you at my own risk Please, for fuck’s sake, Let me come home!
Dear EPCOT: I’ll do whatever you want. I’ll tend your gardens. I’ll feed your manatees. I’ll find Nemo. I’ll believe LeFou is Cupid. I’ll clean up the the drunk spewed vomit every night during Food & Wine. Whatever it takes, I’ll do it. Please, just let me come home.
Dear EPCOT I WANT YOU BACK! Oh baby I need one more chance I tell ya that I love you Baby Oh, baby (oh), baby (oh) I want you back! I want you back!
Dear EPCOT Remember those after close walks together? I’d stroll through your World Showcase with no one else around. When that was done, you hid me in a corner of Future World & I listened to your melodies & stared lovingly at your neon. We can have that again. Let me come home
Dear EPCOT Since you are never letting me come home, I demand you return what’s rightfully mine My Orange Bird AP magnet My Electric Umbrella Menu The Innoventions Loop Club Cool The Fountain of Nations My Colortopia Paint brush My ❤️ Please let me come home!
Dear EPCOT: I’ve found Buzzy. He was naked & afraid when I located him, but I took him in & gave him shelter. He says he’ll only agree to return to The Wonders of Life Pavilion if I am allowed to come with him. He says we are a package deal. Please, let us come home.
Theme park rides are being recreated at home, but what about ones that were ERASED FROM EXISTENCE!? Jump in a time machine and go BACK IN TIME to re-live BACK TO THE FUTURE... THE RIDE! youtu.be/bOLdX_NGZvY #HomeMadeDisney #HomeMadeUniversal #BackToTheFuture #UniversalStudios
Dear EPCOT: Why do you remain silent? When are you going to speak up and admit I’m to be kept away even longer? I just wanted to let you know, no matter how long we’re apart, I’ll always carry a torch for you. I’m still waiting to come home.
Dear EPCOT, I stayed when Horizons fell; when your dinosaurs became extinct; when Tomorrow’s Child moved out; when your fountain ran dry; even when Dreamfinder flew away, I stayed by your side. What do I get for my faithfulness? Exile. How can you force me out? Let me come home
Dear EPCOT So, you saw those pics of me with Universal. I’m sorry. Yes, she’s younger, & it was thrilling at first, but she lacks your depth. She means nothing. It’s you that I love. I’m never going to see her again. Not even when she calls in a few weeks. I just wanna come home!
Dammit EPCOT It’s not just about you! Figment called. He’s terrified. Channing doesn’t even pretend to care. That bruiser Ralph stole his toilet paper & threatened to wreck his house. Joy’s off her meds & just cries constantly. He’s truly suffering. Let me come home, for his sake
Dear EPCOT: I’ve done what you asked. I thanked the Phoenicians. I listened to the land. I helped you find Nemo. I’ve soared over the earth. I even went to Mars for you. I’m trying to make things right & all you say is, “Let it Go“. We can still make us work. Let me come home.
Dear EPCOT: I never meant it when I said the wand made you look fat. I’m sorry for saying you shouldn’t try new things. You can keep the Beauty & the Beast Sing-a-Long. It doesn’t seem so bad now. Your new Canada movie is cute. I’ll love you no matter what. Can I come home now?
Dear EPCOT: I’ve dealt with your moods & changing looks. I even tolerated all the walls you put up between us, but I can’t handle you locking me out like this. I know you say being together is just not healthy for me, but I miss being with you. Please baby, let me come home.
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