Defunct.Underscore @Defund_
Sacrilegious? Fuck yeah I'm sack religious. Worship that mf sack 🏳️🌈 My Location Joined November 2019-
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Defunct.Underscore retweeted
@fesshole “their nan’s roast will change your life bro” meanwhile it’s just dry beef, burnt potatoes and social obligation
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Defunct.Underscore retweeted
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
was talking with a normie co-worker and he brought up his friend who works at Lockheed Martin and I said, "Oh shit, is he working on the child seeking missiles" Let me tell you, that was NOT the correct dialogue option.
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
My son was just born and another dad at the nursery congratulated me and said his daughter was born yesterday. He said maybe they'll marry each other. Sure, like my son is going to marry someone twice his age.
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
Guy who sucks at building boats: no, it's supposed to be like that. I made it like that on purpose.
This boat is called a “Log Bronc” and is used to move logs around in sawmill ponds
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
This insinuates that Hitler existed in the zootopia universe
So... Is this a "Wolfswagen"? 🐺 #Zootopia2
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
Visiting my best friend’s cat and she’s trying her best to explode me with her mind
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
So excited for my baby’s first sentence. I speak only Finnish to him while my husband speaks only Afrikaans, often simultaneously, all while speaking English to one another in front of him. I cannot comprehend how he is going to form a sentence, but trust the plan
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
Discovering tool use and the first thing you do with that monumental power is scratching your testicles
So, like... that tool use in a boviid, isn't it?
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
To the lady who made my bagel today I actually love you
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
How do you know he’s not doing this out of hate and spite? You don’t.
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
party rocking with a mouse tonight piece of cheese im gonna have a big bite
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
@hausofdecline mtf deer girl getting my bedsheets tangled in her antlers and leaping out the 4th story window in a panic
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
I was 30 miles from home when I realised there was a bee stuck in the car. I felt strangely guilty and drove all the way back home to let her out so she didn't get stranded with no hive.
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
do NOT wear a shirt that says "kiss me it's my birthday" to a queer event, i had too many girls approaching me and only two lips
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
@booktycoon I love my sludge wife
Defunct.Underscore retweeted
Me: do you love me? *400,000 gallons of drinking water are converted into an infinitely dense toxic black sludge that is excreted out from the effluent pipe on a Nevada server farm* ChatGPT: Yes -- Im wife . Not only that, mmm but lnnb , largge Wife Me: oh my God it's human
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