Chocolate Teapot @mand_brun
Pendle Witch on the south coast. Hove, England Joined May 2011-
Tweets130K
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Followers13K
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Following2K
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Likes176K
Today I have been out with @teresajanedavis for a glass of wine which turned into 3 😁 lovely !
Dear Heavenly Father, this time, please can my lillies open before they fucking die? Amen
I dont know what to make of things right now, after the trauma of my ex, quickly followed by cancer, I've been in no mood to meet anyone yet here I am dating a bloke who just seems to love treating me, with no expectations. So patient and undemanding. Dunno 😕
I sent my sis a pic of the bloke I've been out with. She said ' ooo he's wearing sunglasses, you don't get that in Colne' haha
Still paying for pet insurance and expensive hair do's for Molly but haven't got the pleasure of her company. It's like having a kid in boarding school ! Received this today 🥰
Lovely day in Hove
The 3 piece suite we had when I was little was black plastic with orange seats and was so light that when you sat on the arm, the whole bloody thing would tip up !
I love how sometimes you can go out, have a disappointing night and feel a bit 😕 but then you look at Twitter and see lots of friends and familiar faces there, it’s a comfort ( I haven’t had a bad night btw, but had plenty before)
Anyway enough of fellas love and stuff and on to the serious stuff. My good friend @goldilocksrocks sent me Lancashire crisps. They are the best crisps I have had in MY LIFE! After wolfing them down I got Waitrose and not a patch on the Lancashire 🙄
The fella I went on a date with I met a few months ago, he said he hasn’t stopped thinking about me since. I didn’t know that! Anyway he’s taking me to lovely restaurant at the weekend. Isn’t life strange ?!
Blimey, I’m on a date and having the best time ! X
My neighbours have made some lovely window boxes so I've just been to buy some plants for them and do you know why ? Because I'm very fucking nice 💅
FFS the surgeon's secretary totally messed up the booking for my op so now have to wait until end of May. What a carry on !
Watching Mammals reminds me of when I used to work in Ellesmere Port, I used to get the bus that went via Chester Zoo and would regularly see a rhinoceros, giraffe and such like en route 🦒
I was perfectly happy with one bottle between me and my friend but she ordered another 😩
Watching Pingu and she’s wearing her Easter socks
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Ćh💋ryl 👩🏼�.. @clumsyoaf33
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Chris @ChrisB180716
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𝗣𝗲𝗿𝗿𝗶 .. @perrigame
31K Followers 2K Following Came with a warning label but I ate it. Low riding junkie girl🌷Owner of Amooz Boosh 🍭 🍰 🍪 🧁 🎂🍿𝙄𝙣𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙢📸 perri.nicole and amooz.boosh
Grant @Grant_Colgate
14K Followers 1K Following
Ćh💋ryl 👩🏼�.. @clumsyoaf33
40K Followers 6K Following Clumsy Oaf A bit Feisty🔥Happy to take the piss out of myself 😉Typo twat 🤦🏼♀️ Outfit tweeter 👗 #ClumsysCloset
🌳🐈🐈⬛Cat.. @MumbrianSpinner
10K Followers 5K Following Small, noisy, critter-loving nurse. Throws horns a lot 🤘 Frequently outdoors, goofing with the bees 🐝
Gwendolyn @GLB_88
18K Followers 875 Following Arsenal, new shoes, boobs, Ibiza! I don’t like people so don’t talk to me. 😎
Flups @TheRealFlups
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Ms Parsnip @parsnip45
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Yes. @beck1sm2
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12K Followers 4K Following Here’s to the light in your eye and the sunshine in your smile 🥂
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When it comes to bein.. @custard71
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Stephanie Orange @StephanieAVFC
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In not at all creepy news, Splodge keeps telling me that someone called Jack is by the window and now apparently he has gone into the floor. I don't know anyone called Jack. Or anyone who can disappear into a floor.
I’m always mildly aggrieved when someone I like likes someone that I don’t like on here. I’m glad that we can agree that this is a you problem.
@mand_brun Oh Mand she’s driving me to distraction! She told me a teacher was a misogynist c u n t as well haha
I've said it before & I'll say it again. For the love of God stop making women dance in adverts. You don't see men having to dance while eating their cereal or putting on their deodorant because NO ONE FUCKING DANCES WHEN DOING THESE THINGS so stop making women do it in adverts!
My pre op assessment nurse just told me I need to remove the gel varnish from my fingers AND toes and I’m sorry but
I find myself drawn to the new Loaf dog beds…. But also. Know Richard shits his pants sometimes…. But….
Addiction is such a fucking cunt not just for those who are addicted, but for the people who have to live with them. If anyone has any tips, pile them on as I’m doing it all wrong and well, last fucking thread and all that.
Just resigned despite not yet having written confirmamtion of the job offer I’m told is on the way. Spices things up a bit doesn’t it?
If you bring lunch to work and do not eat it by 10 am, what kind of a psycho are you?
Mr Fq has made a thing out of his toy trunk, some sort of small hydraulic lift, and a turntable. Here it is in action. Look.
Another day begins and so with it so does the bombardment of texts from youngest on her way to school. Baby Jesus please give me strength, did laugh at the last one though…
@mand_brun I’ve just finished at the Osteopath and told him we had just one. Didn’t we have just one? 😂 Lovely to see you as always ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Luxembourg City, you are spoiling us 🇱🇺😊
Got a date tonight, lads. With the Spanish Historian. Wasn’t going to this holiday, but then I thought… you’re only young once, and being as I’m no longer young, I need to make the most of it even more!
One day off my phone and I missed the chance of grabbing a free horse in London.
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