Alex Major @AlexMajor97
Salem, MO Joined May 2013-
Tweets1K
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Followers368
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Following313
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Likes4K
happy large boulder the size of a small boulder day to those who celebrate
happy large boulder the size of a small boulder day to those who celebrate
Don't mind me. I'll just be taking the next 1-2 years as a period of mourning for yet another internet dog that I had become wildly attached to 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
When I get on the internet and see these scandals, I get closer and closer to fully becoming 85 years old because I have no idea who anyone is 🤷
I vote that tacos are the best meal based on cost/easiness to make/yumminess ratio 🌮😍
Not gonna lie, every time I hear about a couple getting married that met on an app I die a little inside 🙃
People buying extremely cheap clothing online and then being shocked when it looks cheap is something I just do not understand 🤔
I got a light sunburn on my face today because I left my visor at home. I'm always so careful and when does this happen? The day before a dermatologist appointment. 🙃🙃🙃🙃 They're gonna yell at me, I can feel it
I'm about to start an anti-smoking campaign in TN cause there are more smokers here than I have ever seen in my life 😳
Feeling rich because I bought name brand contact solution 🤑
I have never seen so many people smoking cigarettes as I have since moving to TN. What the heck is happening here? 🙃
Considering taking some time at the pool today to just scream under water. It's called therapy look it up 🙃
Ah nothing like experiencing great healthcare... Aka having a mental breakdown in the Walgreens bathroom because you can't get a prescription because it's $800 🙃
Is today going to be a bones or no bones day? 🦴 @jongraz and Noodle the pug are back in studio!
Man is it gonna be a blast moving to Tennessee the day before my job starts 🙃🙃 But also remaining ~positive~ because I'm starting my dream job and have a place to live 🥰
Today is the first day in months that I didn't have to wake up for something. There's nothing I have to do today, which feels insane. I'm so happy ☺️☺️☺️
I pretend I’m OK but deep down I miss Abbott Elementary. ☹️
oh sweetie you must not hang out with enough over-educated, under-loved millennial women. we make charcuterie boards for one now.
I really do not understand the point of having a drive thru at Sonic... Is it for people who do not know how to back up? 😂
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happy large boulder the size of a small boulder day to all who celebrate
Large boulder the size of a small boulder is completely blocking east-bound lane Highway 145 mm78 at Silverpick Rd. Please use caution and watch for emergency vehicles in the area.
hey can i get an ETA on that this too shall pass?
Sim: hooba noobie oh feebee lay Pentecostals: this guy gets it!
no one: Russell Crowe in Les Mis:
There's gotta be a woman out there somewhere who is trying to do a temperature blanket and an embroidery journal and a daily meditation and keep a diary and log all her meals and meet her Goodreads goal and do 1k outside and she's probably in the middle of a panic attack rn
im offering this simple phrase to kids from one to ninety two: hell yeah brother
Rizz? You mean the old razzle dazzle???
Just Amazing …I bet he doesn’t even know he has been rediscovered…as a result of being blind ….
deleting dating apps because i want to meet someone the old fashioned way (returning home after quitting my job in the city to help save the local bakery and learn the true meaning of christmas)
Everyone has their talents. Mine is picking the grocery store checkout line filled with people who apparently have never gone through a grocery store checkout line before in their life.
@jimmyoutsold They mad she didnt sing at one part. Shes just getting in her zone to tour. They act like her dancing isnt one of the reason most people are there
Was feeling a little reckless so decided to sit at the wrong end of the sofa. The room looks different from over there. It's not natural. I fear I may have witnessed sights that were not mine to behold.
Well if the government shutdown, who am I paying my student loans to?
Found a very sick email I sent to Club Penguin in 2008 that’s so slay
Whoever keeps putting gray hardwood floors in apartments, i need you to know that you are ruining everything for all of us
every time I write an email I think: “you need to be professional. no smiley faces. no exclamation points. use big, smart words. you are so so brave” and then I’ll get a reply from some 60 year old VP named Mike that’s like, “thx. have a gr8 wknd! Get Outlook for iOS”
She’s taking selfies—people are literally being murdered in her building and she’s taking selfies
Found the video...Danny bet Ashton to french kiss 14 year old Mila during one of her first scenes. Notice how he downplays his actions. No wonder Ashton covers for Danny, they have dirt on each other! Birds of a feather...
oh they really fucked up
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